(Closed) T-minus 2 weeks til his timeline ends…thoughts?

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: When and/or will he propose?

    Yes! before Florida

    Yes, in Florida

    Yes, in March... (why)

    Yes, in April (why)

    No, not ready (why)

    Didn't read, too long!

  • Post # 197
    Member
    520 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @WannaBeeMrsB:  you can always hit the “report”button. Your behavior isn’t any better or above this conversation just because you decide to arbitrarily single someone out for being rude. 

    Post # 199
    Member
    296 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    My guess was an April proposal because of how long it might take to actually make the ring.

    Post # 200
    Member
    2567 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Here’s the thing. The OP is exhausting in her relentless pursuit of an engagement ring. The advice for her to learn how to be patient and how to compromise might put her on a path to a long, healthy relationship.  Sugar-coating it by guessing random dates for her anticipate proposal only reinforces those habits, partially because it gives her the attention she craves, and partially because no one tells her that she might be taking things a bit too far.  And encouraging such persistent, exhausting behavior might put her on a path where her SO eventually finds her equally overwhelming, which is not exactly a recipe for a long and healthy marriage. 

    So is it really better to not say anything at all just because no one wants to say what the OP wants to hear?

    Post # 201
    Member
    310 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @subtlebee You say a proposal is something that both parties should be happy with. How is he happy if you are ruining the effort he puts into proposing. You sound very selfish but I guess youre not going to let it go. Good luck with the proposal and probably controlling every other aspect of his life. 

    Post # 203
    Member
    751 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @ChemistryBride:  +1.

     

    One year?? And pushing THIS hard? Yiiikes.

     

    I totally agree with

    View original reply
    @SnurfMurph86:  who wrote:
    “Also, the whole “I am sooooo impatient tee hee!” thing is one of those quirky personality traits that can be perceived as cute a year into a relationship, it does not bode well in a lifetime together. He might love it about you now, but it gets old fast once the engagement, wedding, and honeymoon excitement wears off.”

     

    Not cute. Engagement should be about BOTH of you, and you’re probably ruining the fun for him on some level… even if he acts like your impatience is cute or endearing now, it’s gotta be frustrating that it doesn’t seem like you want him to have any say in how this is carried out.

    Post # 204
    Member
    510 posts
    Busy bee

    @Wonderstruck:  +1000!

     

    I’ve seen her posts, and oh well, I’m kind of curious to see what happens in March?

     

    I have my popcorn ready!!

    Post # 205
    Member
    510 posts
    Busy bee

    @SnurfMurph86:  I’ll put $10 and say he’ll propose on February 23rd at exactly 4:54pm too!!

    View original reply
    @jehembee:  she just sounds desperate, just let it bee 😉 desperation never sounds attractive, but you never know, some guys may like it! lol

    Post # 207
    Member
    510 posts
    Busy bee

    @subtlebee:  so what if he proposes in March, and you said no, and he decides to walk away . What will you do then?

    Post # 208
    Member
    118 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    @subtlebee:  I think you don’t realize but he has taken your opinions into The proposal, and so it is not only about him but also you. Just as you said you would like it. He’s decided on a ruby, he wont’t propose in March, and I’m sure he will do it in a fashion that you will appreciate (you said you want it to ne just the 2 of you). If he didn’t take any of these things into consideration then, maybe, you would have something to complain about with the proposal not being about the 2 of you, but it sounds like hes doing it the way you would like it. 

    You said you just want him to propose, with or without the ring, he sounds like he may be more traditional and want to wait for the ring. For that reason I think you may have to wait a Bit longer. 

    Regarding the whole March situation, I believe it would be helpful to seek some sort of grief counselling, as others have also recommened and you haven’t acknoweldged. I know dealing with loss is hard, but a whole month set aside to mourn the loss is unhealthy, your brother wouldn’t want you to do that. I also think the reason you’re pushing for a Feb proposal is because you likely want something happy to go into March with, rather than waiting through an already tough time with something else weighing on your shoulders. 

    Unfortunately, I think you need to drop this timeline. You’re BF likely gave it to you to keep you from pestering him, but seeing as it hasn’t worked, he has no reason to stick with it. He knows you’ll bother him anyway, so the timeline was really a moot point. If you had held up your end of the deal (ie. Not bothering him constantly) Then he likely would have been inclined to propose by the date he first agreed. 

    I also think that you should think hard about your actions, you say you pout all the time, havd to patience, etc. think about how this will look when you have children, if you parent them with no patience it will show in their personalities. Having an impatient adult is one think, but a child who constantly pouts and always wants their way is another. At least you know when to stop, and hoping don’t take it to far, children don’t know these things, and will throw tantrums. You won’t be teaching your child(ren) anything helpful, only how to be a brat. (i realize this is completely off-topic, but I just wanted to put the whining and pouting into another perspective, ome that you can maybe see how it is unhealthy, and something you need to work on. We all have flaws, so please don’t take this as a personal attack). 

     

    Post # 210
    Member
    592 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    To me it doesn’t sound like you take engagement or marriage seriously. You sound like a kid who wants her icecream NOW and wont wait five minutes for it. This is a huge, life-changing thing for your SO and if he wants to wait a few more weeks to pop the question, for gods sake let him wait a few more weeks. In the grand scheme of things, it’s not going to make a world of difference.

    Post # 211
    Member
    6580 posts
    Bee Keeper

    He’s going to propose. When? I don’t know. But it’s obviously soon. It sounds like he loves you and wants to make it perfect. Sit back and just let him make it perfect.

    The topic ‘T-minus 2 weeks til his timeline ends…thoughts?’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors