(Closed) T-minus 2 weeks til his timeline ends…thoughts?

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: When and/or will he propose?

    Yes! before Florida

    Yes, in Florida

    Yes, in March... (why)

    Yes, in April (why)

    No, not ready (why)

    Didn't read, too long!

  • Post # 108
    Member
    2424 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I’m sorry OP but I agree with the majority. As I said earliet, I just don’t think he’s ready (which is how I voted). You keep repeating that it’s “his” timeline, but think about it this way. You proposed to him over the summer, after only about 6-7 months of dating. He decides that he wants to do the proposal (I see nothing wrong with that) but of course he is going to feel pressured to do it soon since you already obviously want to be engaged. So even if he came up with the date of February, he still felt pressure to do that since you had already proposed, so I don’t think that insisting it’s his timeline makes any difference. He’s still be walking around with this weight and pressure of you expecting to get engaged for almost half of your relationship!

    Once you’ve jumped the gun and started pushing engagement so early, it’s impossible to put it in a vacuum to know if it’s what he wants or if he is just trying to make you happy so he can still be with you. I suggest following the Bees advice and cooling it with all the engagement talk and pressure, for real. I don’t see it achieving anything other than resentment and possibliy sabotaging your relationship. When he is ready, he will propose, and there will be no more questions.

    Post # 109
    Member
    3751 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    This thread is hilarious, all the OP asked was when you think her SO is going to propose. She didn’t ask if she’s been dating long enough, if she’s old enough, mature enough, to question her status as a doctoral candidate, etc. 

    Sounds to me like he’s enjoying this game of pushing back at your pushiness and making you wait until HE wants to propose. I don’t think it’ll be long, can’t say if it’ll be feb or april.

    Also, I’m very sorry for the loss and pain you’ve endured. I can’t even begin to imagine what that’s like to deal with. 

    Good luck with everything and try to give him a break! You know it’s coming and he knows you want it to be soon. It’ll happen!

    Post # 111
    Member
    1621 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I think the compromise goes something like this:

    He wants to propose with the ring + You don’t want a proposal in March

    = April proposal

    = everybody happy

     

     

    Post # 112
    Member
    3261 posts
    Sugar bee

    Wow, I feel really bad for your boyfriend because he has to put up with this level of crazy.

    Post # 113
    Member
    245 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    View original reply
    @subtlebee:  Just responding to your comment about March and your brother’s death. 

    My fiance was the same way when his father died. Didn’t really feel it at the time, but each year after he gets sick and depressed around the date. His brother is the same way. 

    I can see why you wouldn’t want to have a proposal overlap that period of mourning. The conflicting emotions would be more stressful. I’m guessing that one of the reasons you’re so on about him proposing soon is because you don’t want this situation to happen. I really hope that he’s trying to throw you off so he can propose next week or something. 

    Post # 115
    Member
    452 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    View original reply
    @cdncinnamongirl:  +1

    I also don’t think that being on the bee is helping your (im)patience – you spend most of the time on your multiple ‘waiting’ threads defending yourself and your relationship, and generally not getting the answer(s) that you want.

    Post # 116
    Member
    39 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: November 2008

    View original reply
    @subtlebee:  People were trying to be constructive, but you have just not really be receptive to it.

    Post # 117
    Member
    245 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    Some bees need to remember their manners.

    Post # 119
    Member
    245 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    View original reply
    @subtlebee:  🙂 <3 Love and best of luck to you. 

    Post # 120
    Member
    469 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    The very same weekend my finace had planned to propse, my grandma (who raised me), died. I was out of the state for about 15 days at the end of the summer, then tings got real busy, by the time he ordered my ring (and it took about 3 weeks to come in), it was already September. He had everthing planned and ready to go (he asked my parents permission in July)..everything was ready to go and my grandma died. He was bummed but didnt want to do it the same weekend of her death then her funeral was postponed for a week bc they pastor was out of town..so now he was looking at waiting even longer…He proposed the Saturday after my grandmas funeral which was the day before (Friday). It got to the point where he just got tired of every little thing coming up and stopping him from having the right moment. He threw out his whole cute proposal plan and just got down on one knee in our house bc he didnt want to wait any longer. 

    I think you are being dramatic about the month of March. I am sorry about your brother however I also think that you can celebrate death with another good milestone happening in life. I wouldnt rule out March. 

    Also, from the sound of it, you have only been together for a year? Whats the rush? Maybe he isnt ready, maybe he is annoyed with you pushing it down his throat every little chance you get (which is what sounds like you doing). 

    Relax. It will happen when he is ready and not a day before then. 

    Also, if you ‘love’ him SO much, what is more important…being engaged only after a year of dating and possibly rushing him into something or losing him because you wouldnt let it go and let him do it when he is ready? Are you willing to lose him just because you want it your way or no way? 

    The topic ‘T-minus 2 weeks til his timeline ends…thoughts?’ is closed to new replies.

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