Tacky or Nah?

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

You should register at Zola where they can gift you funds. That way there shouldn’t be too many questions but I’d consider adding a few small things to it also.

Post # 3
Member
5568 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

wathenwedding17 :  

You don’t put it on the invitation. If you have a website, you put your registry info on there, which is where you would talk about your renovations.

I don’t think it’s any different than a honey fund, you are still asking for money which never goes well on the bee.

But you never ask for cash or gifts directly on the invite.

Post # 4
Member
9595 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

If you have to ask…

Post # 6
Member
5568 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

wathenwedding17 :  

We don’t have a registry or website either. If you don’t have a registry or a website, people will give you cash and you can put it towards your renovations.

I don’t think I’ve been asked about a registry, and even if I am, I will just say, we have everything that we need, so we aren’t registered. I doubt people will push the issue after that.

Post # 7
Member
1090 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Have a small registry and then let people figure it out for themselves. That’s what we did, and we got a lot of cash.

Post # 8
Member
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

wathenwedding17 :  I don’t think so. You can read up on their policy. They do have some things they require for actual items but not funds.

Post # 9
Member
240 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I don’t think you should make any mention of it or sign up for any sites. Don’t register for any gifts and people will give you cash, which you can use on your house. 

Post # 10
Member
3224 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Just don’t register. People know cash is a welcome gift. 

Post # 11
Member
2527 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

Tacky.

 

Just don’t register, and people will get the hint you don’t want physical gifts. That’s all you need to do. 

Post # 12
Member
4586 posts
Honey bee

Just dont register and people will give you cash.  You’re allowed to use the cash for whatever you want.  If people ask, then just say you really don’t need anything and have been saving up for some home renovations.  Let people ask you, don’t beat them to the punch loudly declaring what form you want to be gifted in – that is always tacky, no matter how cute the poem.

Post # 13
Member
12239 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

No matter how you dress it up, it would be inappropriate and crass to ask for money. 

Registries are based on the idea that guests have to actively seek out the couple’s own list of items they are collecting for their home. There is no polite way for someone who says she already has everything she needs to essentially beg for something that is a luxury and a lifestyle choice. 

Don’t register, which properly only “implies” that you are not thinking of gifts at all.  People will either buy you gifts or write checks on their own. IF and only if someone asks you if you are registered, you can say no, you have everything you need, and are saving up for renovations. 

Post # 14
Member
351 posts
Helper bee

I agree with the above posters. My cousin and his Fiance did a go fund me for their wedding and I just thought it was so tacky. I would have given them a check anyway! If I google and can’t find a wedding registry I know they want $. I give a check anyway, but I think your guests will get it. the ones who don’t wouldnt’ give money anyway

Post # 15
Member
711 posts
Busy bee

100% Tacky – My stance holds true for couples asking for a “honeymoon fund” etc.  

 

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