Takes forever to respond to my text ?

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
4021 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

If you want to hang out then suggest something. If he wants to see you too then he will agree. If not..he won’t. Don’t let your night be held hostage because he MIGHT ask you to hang out. 

Post # 3
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2018 - City Hall

This is when I would make other plans. My motto is “you snooze, you loose”. 

Side question, does he have a very demanding job where he cannot always be available to text or something?

Post # 4
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2018 - City Hall

I also don’t like to “chase” men because the biggest indicator we have of how much they like us is how much they initiate/contact/SHOW us. If they’re really into us, they normally do.

Post # 5
Member
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2021

Your text makes you sound quite boring to be honest. You should have a full and exciting life already, one that he adds to and wants to be apart of. Saying that you have absolutely nothing going on at all when it’s the weekend doesn’t create any intrigue. Don’t wait around for him.

Matthew Hussey has great tips on his site and YouTube channel on how to handle dating and communicating over text especially.

https://www.academia.edu/35592679/9-texts-matt_hussey-new.pdf

Post # 6
Member
265 posts
Helper bee

Definitely give yourself a mental cutoff time and be busy if he contacts you later. He’s waited too long already.

Post # 8
Member
1694 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
sarahj1238 :  I agree with the suggestion to take a look at some of Matthew Hussey’s posts and videos. They are quite entertaining.

The point is, at this point in the relationship if he wants to makes plans with you, they need to be concrete plans, and they need to be made ahead of time, not day of. Next time he asks if you can hang out Saturday, let him know he’ll have to make plans earlier in the week because you are usually busy that day. Seeing you is a privilege. If he texts day of – make something up: say you are meeting with friends, catching up on some work, or seeing the latest exhibition. You’re not waiting for him.

Post # 9
Member
2046 posts
Buzzing bee

I asked my SO what he thinks and he said to just make your own plans and don’t bother with a cutoff time. Don’t text him again. let him come to you. 

He thinks maybe your guy was just gauging what you were doing along with other people he may have reached out to as well to see what is most appealing. He may just not be super into it

Post # 12
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2018 - City Hall

View original reply
sarahj1238 :  can we “shoot” for tomorrow? As in, let’s aim for tomorrow and “we will see”.

Nah bruh, that is not concrete. 

 

Post # 13
Member
2046 posts
Buzzing bee

Yeah you’re exactly right OP. Tell him you’re busy. This way he will learn that if he wants to see you, he has to make solid plans in advance. It will also help you guage his interest level. If he doesn’t want to make the effort, then he won’t and you can move on without any loss of your dignity. And if he’s interested, he will make plans ahead of time next time.

You are showing him that you are no one’s backup and that you have an exciting and busy life! He will find that enticing and want to schedule the next meetup if you aren’t as available. Good luck!

Post # 14
Member
414 posts
Helper bee

Nope… you’re busy tomorrow. He needs to make plans with you. Not leave you hanging with a “maybe tomorrow”. I would never make plans with a date at the last minute. You’re not his back up plan. You should be THE plan.

Post # 15
Member
1172 posts
Bumble bee

I think he was waiting on another date to pan out. Looks like it has so you got bumped to tomorrow (maybe tomorrow).

View original reply
sarahj1238 :  

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