Post # 1
I am already nervous about my walk down the isle, with everyyone staring at me and all. I have a tendency to get dizzy when I’m nervous, which is usually resolved by simply sitting down for a bit. But I won’t be sitting down during the ceremony and I’m terrified of fainting or something. Has anyone ever taken some anti-anxiety meds that are appropriate for occasions such as a wedding (i.e., don’t make me too drowsy, etc.)? Thanks!!!!
Post # 3
I have not taken any anti-anxiety medications, but I am a physician. Although I highly recommend you speak with your doctor ultimately about it, as he/she knows more about you than anyone on this board, I wanted to make a suggestion.
If you tend to get dizzy or lightheaded, think back and remember if you noticed any palpitations or fast heart rate. If that is the case, a simple beta blocker(typically used for blood pressure) can be a safe and effective way to calm your nerves. It is prescribed by many doctors for people with stage fright who need to give speeches, etc. It also has the added benefit of not being addictive or harmful. Also, because it is not a sedative, you will not be drowsy or out of it during your wedding day.
I definitely would talk to your doctor if you consider something stronger, like a sedative/hypnotic(Xanax, Valium, etc.). They must be prescribed appropriately and carefully monitored, especially if you haven’t tried them in the past.
In addition, try looking up some biofeedback or mentalization techniques. They are very helpful with those types of situations(if practiced regularly) without requiring medications.
Anyway, I know the feeling – I hate getting stared at too! Still, I wouldn’t use anything stronger unless I had to. You wouldn’t want to sleep your way through your wedding, right?! 🙂
Post # 4
This is sort of an aside, but if you tend to get dizzy when you’re nervous, you should mention this to the person escorting you down the aisle. I also get dizzy and fainty when I’m nervous. Walking down the aisle, my dad had my arm gripped so tightly that he cut off the circulation to my entire arm, and the more I wiggled the harder he gripped! He had felt me get really hot then cold and he feared I was about to faint, so he was trying to prevent me from falling. So just tell your escort not to grip you too tightly!
Post # 5
- Wedding: September 2008 - A tiny town just outside of Glacier National Park
I took some relaxants to help me sleep, but they didn’t do much otherwise.
Make sure that whatever you take, you test beforehand on another occasion to see how the drugs affect you. You wouldn’t want to face side effects on your wedding day.
Post # 6
hokouk, I had the same fear- I would get dizzy & feel faintish at church on a weekly basis through my teen years- and was terrified it would happen during the ceremony where we had to either stand or use kneelers the entire time… I never thought to use an anti-anxiety drug (obviously talk to a doc as angel said), but I ended up being fine during the entire ceremony. I know everyone is different, but it really does help to not dwell on the fear too much ahead of time. Once you make it down you really do relax, and honestly you forget about the crowd since your back is to them the entire time! Plus, if possible try to stay in the limo (or sit where ever you are waiting prior to the aisle) until the last possible moment – it’s the standing that always gets to me – and don’t lock your knees, for whatever reason that seems to work!! Good luck 🙂
Post # 7
Consider this…the "everybody" that will be "staring" at you will actually be your friends, family, and other loved ones and they will be looking at you with love, not judging you or staring at you. The ceremony will go by so quickly, I promise!!!! Personally, I don’t think it is worth it to possibly be too drugged to remember what should be the most important day of your life. A friend of mine took xanax on her wedding day because she was nervous and didn’t want to be shaky. Well, she wasn’t nervous, but she also wasn’t herself. She ended up pretty much being high and she said her vows in a sing-song/broadway type of voice!! Also, she doesn’t remember a lot of the day and she made weird faces on pictures! I know that things effect different people in different ways, but she really regrets taking something. For me, I hate public speaking, even in front of a small group, but on my wedding day, I would have stood up there on the alter for hours so everybody could get a look at me!!! hahaha I mean I did spend a lot of time and money on the way I looked!
Post # 8
There are a couple of options for this. The anti-anxiety meds usually make you drowsy for about the 1st week that you take them (many use them for sleep). A beta blocker is a good option but can make your blood pressure drop and increase the dizzy feeling. A steroid is also an option but the side effects usually nix that one (can you say angry, hungry bride). If you are going to try something do a "trial run" first and see how the meds effect you and yes, always check with your doc 1st. (Info from a pharmacist). 🙂
Post # 9
Thanks everyone! I actually did talk to my doctor about this a while ago. I told him I am scared for the wedding, but I could also use something for my fear of flying (I curretnly have some Xanax froma freind which is a high dosage but knocks me out – great for flying, not for wedding). I did try the beta blocker while flying and it did not help one bit. I still felt panicky and my heart still raced when the turbulence hit. But I agree with everyone, better to fight through the nerves then to be drugged up. I think it will have to be a beat blocker or nothing. Can the pharamists tell me more about the side effects – i assume i can’t drink too much. Danaadell, you mentioned it would make me feel more dizzy. Is there a way to combat that?
Thanks so much for all your wonderful advice!!!!
Post # 10
Propanolol is the main beta blocker used for this. It can lower your blood pressure some and may make you tired or dizzy (or you could have no side effects). It is ok with some alcohol but it counters its effects. Other good things propanolol can is decrease flushing (so like you, like me 🙂 ) get red when people stare at you it can lessen that. You should tell your doc if you have any heart condition and you can’t take if you have asthma or COPD. Other than that few people get diarrhea or nausea (rare) but that is why you should try it before the day of the wedding. 🙂
Post # 11
I would definitely talk to my doctor about this before making any decisions. I’d also recommend making sure that you have something to eat about an hour before the walk down the aisle, and that you drink plenty of water beforehand. 🙂
Post # 12
Just as an aside(only because you mentioned it), if you like the Xanax, it’s best to get it prescribed from your doctor personally. I’m sure you are aware it is not a good option to take drugs from a friend, because often the dosage and type of medication effect varies between individuals. I just wanted to make sure that you stay safe, and make everyone who reads the boards aware of the issues that go along with taking someone else’s medication.
Now, back to your question. Danaadell was great in reviewing the information for propranolol. Still, I wonder about the dose of propranolol that you received from your doctor for the flying. Consider that a beta blocker may not be enough to curb the psychological fear of flying(I understand, I have a height phobia). Both the dose given and the higher stimulatory signals your body gets from a fear like that will decrease the efficacy of the drug.
Like Danaadell said, I would experiment(with supervision from your doctor) with the beta blockers. I doubt that your fear of your wedding day will be like that of your fear of flying, since walking down the aisle really shouldn’t make you think you’re going to die. 🙂
If that does not work, there are always other options that are nonaddictive, as well as very small doses of Xanax or other medications in the same class if you get no good effect from the other options.
Again, I don’t think I can stress enough the importance of involving your doctor in this. I see too many patients that use these medications incorrectly and end up harming themselves in the process.
Good luck again, and don’t stress. It’s your wedding day!
Post # 13
Dont do it! I wish I had thoguht twice about it when cousin handed me an anti-anxiety pill on the day of the wedding. I thought I would be fine, but cant remember much of what i was doing the whole time. I didnt feel like myself. The following day I said to my fiance I dont remember what happened! Reading the above posting made me more sad, I keep hearing “no one remembers their wedding day, because it goes so fast”. But I am fearful that I dont remember it because of the medication! I had no idea of the side effects! It was the worst decision I could have made!
Post # 14
um, i’ve been taking anxiety medication when needed for wedding related anxiety for about a month already, but i haven’t decided if i’m gonna do it the day of, i may just take my beta blockers and a glass of wine(if you take an axiety pill you should NOT drink so you have to factor that in also)
Post # 15
you may be on them now. I wasnt. It might make a difference if you are used to them, maybe it will hit you differently. I barely drank because I was afraid of getting too messed up (but I did have a cople beers hoping it would take my mind off the fact that I took this pill!)— its is crazy to think that the fact that I took the anxiety pill is now causing so much anxiety! I worry was I loopy in the ceremony? I didnt cry during my ceremony, and am worried the pill blocked my emotions!
Anything else that happens the day of can be brushed off, any mishap, or inperfection of the ceremony or the reception… this, I cant brush it off, I remember taking the pill, I remember thinking “should I take it?”, and I remember hating the fact that I was freaking out so I did. I wouldnt have been freaking out an hour later though! I was only freaking out because I wanted to get to the ceremony location. So when it hit, I was past the time I needed it!
If your beta-blocker is needed then take it, but dont approch the anxiety meds on that day… instead bring a watch so you arent always worried about what time it is. Arrange for transporation to the site days in advance and have a plan so your brides maids arent wondering where they are getting dressed… If you feel nuts, get away from EVERYONE for 5 minutes and have a cup of tea ! If I had slowed down and bought a cup of tea, I never would have made the mistake.
I was stressing, I just wanted to feel better, I wanted to stop yelling at people and stop being a bridezilla… so who knows, maybe it did help. Problem was, that it was on my mind all night, and still is on my mind 2 weeks later. I didnt feel like myself and I feel that it blocked the good emotions as much as it blocked the bad. I would have rather drank to much and forgotten the events of my wedding knowing I had a good time !!