(Closed) Talk me down, ladies. Am I being irrational? Or not?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

Yes, I do think you are being a little sensitive

1) Some people just like to call people by full names, nicknames, etc. Its their style and doesnt matter what other people in your SOs life call him

2) Knowing his full name is a non-issue. When you work together many conversations come up randomly

3) Info on FB. Another non-issues. She probably just didnt think to update it. Now that I am thinking about it I never changed mine when I got laid off.

4) being “hot” So if she wasnt hot, you wouldnt care? Just because she is hot doesnt mean she is up to no good.

Post # 4
Member
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

ugh. double post

Post # 5
Member
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I don’t know how some of you ladies are so very patient. I mean, I wouldn’t post here until I got some answers from Darling Husband first! LOL. I guess I’m just a hothead. Anyway…You see the mini skirt first. I understand that. But it’s just a skirt, you know? He is marrying you.

As for what her connection is to him, I can’t comment on that because only he knows.

Just talk to him to ease your mind. He is your partner and shouldn’t get all upset that you are asking. Darling Husband would ask me if roles were reversed on my FB and some shirtless hunk were tagging me like that.

Try not to worry until you speak with him.

Also, could she possibly work in HR and that’s how she knows his middle name?

Post # 6
Member
3943 posts
Honey bee

@Wonderwoman217: Ummmm yes, you are way overreacting. She knows your SO’s full name and that bothers you? They worked together. When you work with people you learn random things about them, like their middle name. Actually one of my friends calls my Fiance by his full name, because she loves his middle name (its really unique). That doesn’t mean she wants to do him.

Post # 7
Member
858 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think it is absolutely nothing to worry about.

Yes, she sounds like an attention whore. Yes, she was flirting, which is how she learned his middle name in the first place. However, it is the harmless flirting, that, while annoying, you really probably won’t get anywhere by attacking.

I’d be annoyed too, but at least she moved away, right?

Post # 8
Member
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

Your feelings are your feelings and they’re never wrong. I would probably be a little sketched out if some random chick posted that on FI’s FB, too. You said yourself you’re not worried that anything would ever happen between them so I would just turn it into a joke and leave it be. Make fun of her for a few minutes with your SO. Laugh at how bold she is and then forget she even exists. 

Post # 9
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

@farmgirl2106: Why is flirting necessary to learn a middle name? I knew my bosses middle name. A 60+ year old VP. I wasnt flirting. It was a conversation one day in a meeting.

Post # 10
Member
858 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

@lefeymw: You’re right. You don’t have to. But the whole, “John Jacob Schmidt, I miss you!” is where I am getting that she learned it by flirting. I have never heard a girl say that in a non sing song tone, and the OP makes it sound like his middle name is not something he brings up. It sounds like she brought up middle names to talk and flirt. Once again, I said it was harmless flirting and the OP should leave it be, so I am glad that you singled out my post since I took a different opinion than you and yet still agreed that it wasn’t good to let this bother her.

Post # 11
Member
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Yeah, I think you are overreacting.

Post # 12
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

@farmgirl2106: It wasnt singled out because you disagreed. I didnt say I disagreed with your view. I only disagreed with your large gap in logic “Yes, she was flirting, which is how she learned his middle name in the first place”. That is a large assumption to make without having been there, knowing the SO, the female involved or their work environment or relationship.

Post # 13
Member
6825 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Completely over reacting! I know plenty of people’s full names and I soo did not flirt with them to find that out.

As for FB completely non issue

As for being hot, so what your he is with you correct? I really wouldn’t worry about it and step away from FB and cool off

Post # 15
Member
485 posts
Helper bee

I really don’t think you have anything to worry about.

Post # 16
Member
420 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@farmgirl2106: I heart what you said, in both your statements. (Are you from Canada?)

I immediately nodded my head and sighed with relief when you wrote:

“Yes, she sounds like an attention whore. Yes, she was flirting, which is how she learned his middle name in the first place. However, it is the harmless flirting, that, while annoying, you really probably won’t get anywhere by attacking.”

I find it odd how some people don’t think like this. She is very obviously flirting. Come on people.

On the original post…I would so be annoyed, but again, I don’t think your Fiance will even notice what she said, unless you point it out. Calling him by his full name is likely annoying to him. I’m sure he secretly can’t stand her. I wouldn’t be worried about him. But I would be irritated by her.

I have a feeling if you don’t even say anything, he will just be thinking how annoying she is/was.. but you saying something might make him ‘unthink’ that…. you know how men are!

But your idea of saying, “hey, ummm, what’s up with random hot chick’s FB message? Kinda weird, huh?”, is so super funny. I’d say it. Laughing I couldn’t not say something about this hyper-bouncy chick, jumping up and down (in my imagination – that tends to run off…) on his FB page… they weren’t even close right.. Ugh…. Annoying. Desperate. Needy… Those are some words that come to mind when I think about this girl, and others like her. Undecided 

 

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