(Closed) Tasting Troubles

posted 14 years ago in Food
Post # 3
36 posts
  • Wedding: August 2021

For our research/tasting at our reception site, we ended up inviting FI’s parents, who in turn invited his sister and her bf along.  My parents live far away and didn’t mind not participating.  But I do recommend not going by yourselves…the input from everyone was so helpful in figuring out our menu selection for the reception.  It was also a chance for me to get to know his family better and for them to participate in the whole wedding process.  If you don’t feel comfortable inviting both sets of parents, why not just invite one set this time and the other set next time? If you decide not to invite parents, I would go with just inviting Maid/Matron of Honor2/GM3 and paying for them.  I wouldn’t invite the mutual friend and his Girlfriend and not pay for them…but pay for everyone else…that would be kind of weird.

Post # 4
251 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

Honestly, I would take one set of parents only.  If only one set of parents is contributing money to the wedding (or if one set is contributing more than the other, or one is specifically covering the food costs) then bring that set of parents.

I think you may want to reset in your mind what the evening is about.  It’s a vendor meeting.  It’s research.  Fun research (!), but research and possibly negotiations nonetheless.  Don’t treat it like a chance to catch up with your friends or introduce your sets of parents to each other, because this is your one chance to really check out the food options and if you’re more focused on the party your best friend had last weekend than the presentation of the chicken dish, then you’re sort of missing the point.  You need to focus on the food, not the social interactions. 

Because it’s a vendor meeting, I would most definitely not bring the friend who has a brand new girlfriend you’ve never met.  Would you invite her to join you when you’re interviewing photographers or negotiating with DJ’s?  I would imagine not and I just don’t think it’s the right occasion for you to meet her for the first time.

Also, if you do end up bringing your friends, personally I would not pay for them.  I would treat it like any other night out in terms of paying the bill, and that means splitting it!  But I do think it’s a better idea to take parents instead.  That’s my two cents!

Post # 5
17 posts
  • Wedding: November 2007

I realize this isn’t an option, but I’ll suggest it anyway…

 Don’t bring anyone.

DH and I went to ours over lunch, just the two of us. It gave us an opportunity to really talk with the caterers and fine tune the meal to meet our expectations.

More importantly: we got to eat our wedding meal, together. You won’t get to do that the evening of your wedding. I say go by yourself and have a wonderful time. If you are really concerned about the parents’ opinions, go on your own and ask to have a meal boxed up so you can take it with you.


Post # 6
109 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2007

For tasting, keep it small inorder to keep opinions at bay.  Go with your fiance and whoever else may be helping you with the catering bill.  If it’s no one else, bring your mothers to help them feel included in the planning.  I would stay away from inviting friends since as somebody already mentioned, this is a time to get to your the food for your wedding and the people who are responsible for it. 

Post # 7
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2008

i agree with smartl that it is first & formost a vendor meeting, and too many other "things" going on (friends you dont see often, first time parent dinner) just make it more complicated than it should be.  If it’s at all possible, my advice is go multiple times, different people each time- once alone & once with parents. granted we live just a few blocks from our reception place and luckily they offer lunch & tastings weekly, so before we put down a deposit my Fiance & I went for lunch- same food as the tastings you just pay, and regular city workers go there too.  we could discuss the food & service quietly to ourselves w/o getting the full smoozing (for lack of a better word) factor from the staff.  the second time, we took our planner for lunch.  we all tried different foods & it was great to get an opinon from someone who has been around the block w/ wedding food.  that time the vendor knew we were wedding shopping & we did get smoozed a little but that was also good bc we were able to ask questions & make requests.  for our actual "tasting" (where we decide what specific foods we want at our wedding), we will invite both sets of parents, altho it only covers 4 people for free, and pay for them.  i think multiple visits will lessen the pressure you’re feeling about inviting just the right people, especially since it’s a nice restaurant you probably wouldnt mind eating at a few times.  or, maybe youd get sick of the food if you try it so much? let us know what you decide!

Post # 9
126 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

guess what? my fi and i live in massachusetts and planning a michigan (battle creek, to be exact) wedding too! hah! we’re also planning a boston wedding though.

anyway, i would say invite the parents! even though it’s awkward, i would want to know that my parents will enjoy the food. knowing that they enjoy the food will tell me that their friends will probably enjoy the food too. 

Post # 10
796 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I’m inviting both my sets of parents and my FI’s parents. This isn’t as big of deal for me as, with the expection of my mom and dad (sometimes) all 6 parents get along very well.

We are just going to all pitch in at the end (as ours ins’t covered in the fee for the reception) and make a night of it.


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