(Closed) Teacher/former student relationship

posted 5 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 3
2555 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

how old are you and how old is this teacher?

Post # 4
4930 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I go visit my former kindergarten teacher every couple years. My middle/high school was rather small, so I go visit them a lot more often. I don’t see an issue with it, just as long as you’re not showing up at their house or at school in the middle of the day or anything. Any way you can contact the teacher first?

Post # 5
1458 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

At 21, I think you are still a bit in the “student” stage of things with high school teachers. Maybe email them and see when they have a planning period or free period at school during the day, obtain a pass from the front office, and stop by to chat with them or bring them something they like.


Outside of that, if they were really close to you (and it was mutual) maybe invite them out for dinner or coffee, but keep it early, professional (no alcohol or adult topics), and light. Don’t be offended if they decline; teachers can have hundreds, if not thousands of students per year and may have personal boundaries about meeting up with former students.




Post # 6
850 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

“See” as in date, or “see” as in get lunch together and talk about life, get some advice/mentorship? If it’s the last one, totally appropriate! If it’s the first one, it requires a lot more time/thought/discussions.

Post # 10
596 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I became wonderful friends with my 8th grade teacher when I was in high school. We kept in contact throughout hs and college. I still speak to her on occasion, but she has since moved, so our relationship is mainly a facebook one. I’m 26 now.

I thougth this thread was going to be about something I’ve seen a lot lately on facebook – girls dating their former HS teachers! I find it creepy. I mean I guess it’s possible that the relationship TOTALLY happened after graduation – but chances are Mr. X always though “Sally” was pretty hot- and then he was finally (LEGALLY) able to do something about it.

Post # 11
463 posts
Helper bee

@outgoingcutie15:  Totally normal IMO. For me this happened more with college TAs/professors, but I think it’s normal with high school teachers too. Heck, I’ve even hung out with some of the nuns who taught me elementary school!

Post # 12
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Date? No. Catch up over lunch? Totally fine.

Post # 13
1222 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve dropped by to see my high school Spanish teacher. I had her all four years and I baked her a batch of brownies once and took it to her. So no, I don’t think it’s weird at all. In my town, a lot of kids babysit for their teachers, or the families know each other through church, or they have a part time job that puts them in contact with teachers outside of school. I say go for it- worst she can do is politely decline. I would probably make it lunch or coffee instead of dinner though, because those tend to be more casual and appropriate for this kind of thing.

Post # 14
1075 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@outgoingcutie15:  Why would it be inappropriate? 

Just reach out to her and find out for yourself if she wants to meet up with you. If she wants to, then great. If not, she’ll let you know politely.

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