Tell Me About Your Pre-Wedding Events

posted 1 week ago in Parties
Post # 2
Member
1034 posts
Bumble bee

We didn’t have an engagement party because it was around Christmas time and I didn’t want all the fuss. I think lots of people skip that one. 

For my bridal shower, my sister hosted a chill BBQ style event at her house. She did a ‘books or bottles’ gift theme (and also mentioned gifts were not necessary) because we’d already lived together for a couple of years and didn’t really need anything at the time. The grooms party came over afterward so the whole wedding party could hang out for the evening.

Then we did our bachelor/bachelorette as a joint event at my family’s cabin. My best friend and bridesman is a guy and our friend group is quite mixed, so it would have been weird to separate the genders. It was also an awesome time for the whole wedding party to get to know each other better. 

That’s pretty much it!

Post # 4
Member
10631 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

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@castalia:  

l didn’t do anything at all. Well,  he and we might have got a bit stoned when we decided to spend our lives together lol.
For my first long ago marriage l might have had a hens night l think . The rehearsal was just us and parents and wedding party in the church  being told where to stand and how to respond by the vicar . 

lts so different for formal weddings now, more opportunities for fun and celebration but also more potential stress.

Post # 5
Member
150 posts
Blushing bee

I skipped the bridal shower because I’m uncomfortable with all the attention on me (though I did relent to the pressure of my husband and friends and had a small baby shower, which was nice) and we really didn’t need another gifting event. My bachelorette was an overnight in a cute town 45 mins away, just me and 3 other people. We went to a psychic, poked around some shops, had dinner, and were in bed well before midnight. Granted, we were in our late 30s or early 40, with 2 mamas, so old and tired! My husband didn’t have a bachelor party. My husband’s parents had a rehearsal dinner for family (our wedding party consisted only of family, so no need to invite anyone else). The idea of anything more than that seems like too much time and energy, for myself and others!

Post # 6
Member
6231 posts
Bee Keeper

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@castalia:  nothing but the rehearsal dinner, to which everyone was invited. We had a casual self-catered taco salad bar. I made the meat ahead of time and froze, the rest we spent a chunk of the day prepping. Really just a hangout, it was nice. Our families lived too far away for things like showers. Unlike many, I have always enjoyed showers so I was disappointed to miss out (I also like getting stuff, lol) but in the end it’s not the end of the world and I wouldn’t dream of asking people to travel for that. My girls did reach out to guests for photos and designed a puzzle for me (and husband) and guests signed the box instead of a guest book, so that was neat. my husband’s close coworkers and mine each gave a joint gift but that was all their doing and no party involved.  I’ve never had any interest in engagement parties or bachelorettes so no loss there!

Post # 7
Member
1410 posts
Bumble bee

I haven’t really had any events yet…

It was my birthday a few weeks after we got engaged and shortly after we had bought a house. I had friends over and received some “housewarming/engagement/birthday” gifts – usually people just bring a bottle of wine that they end up drinking, people were showing up with a bottle of wine AND a bottle of champagne haha.

I’d prefer to skip the shower although of my inlaws want to throw one I will graciously accept.

I would like a bachelorette night with my girlfriends.

Post # 8
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2021

No engagement party for us, because we got engaged in April of 2020! All non-essential businesses in our state were  required to close, and we were under an order to shelter-in-place. We technically could have thrown something together, probably, but we truly had no idea if it was safe to get together with even our close family, and we weren’t about to risk our health or anyone else’s health for a party.

I had a small “bachelorette party” when my mom and sister came to visit a couple months before the wedding. Our wedding was October 2021 and they came to visit in July. We basically just hung out all weekend and ate some good food, but it was wonderful since I hadn’t seen them in so long due to the pandemic. Once he and his friends were all fully vaccinated, my husband had a bachelor party. They just rented a cabin and had fun for a couple of days!

And then the only other pre-wedding event was the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding. We had it at the same cabin we got married at. It was super intimate and fun and laid-back. We ate spaghetti for dinner and just enjoyed each other’s company. 

Overall, even though my entire engagement and wedding happened in pandemic times, I’m super grateful for the time I was able to spend with my loved ones and I’m happy with how everything played out!

Post # 9
Member
1293 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2018 - UK

Bridal showers and rehearsal dinners are rarely done in the U.K., so we didn’t do those. I adamantly didn’t want a hen party, but my best friend wanted to do something, so we went for afternoon tea at a fancy hotel, just 6 of us. My husband did an escape room and went for a meal.

We didn’t have an engagement party either, I don’t actually know many people who did. My best friend always jokes that she didn’t have one because everyone we know who had an engagement party never actually ended up getting married, and it’s true! Bizarre coincidence or ancient curse aimed just at my group of friends… who knows!

Post # 10
Member
315 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

We skipped engagement party as didn’t really see the need though a couple of close friends took us out for dinner which was nice. 

No rehearsal dinner or shower not really done here but did have a hens. A  dinner cruise with close friends and the mums and then the mums went home and we went out for a bit dancing.

Post # 11
Member
1655 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2019

For my first marriage I did all the things, engagement dinner, bridal shower, rehearsal dinner, and bachlorette party. If it’s something you want to do, I don’t see the harm as long as it doesn’t put people out. 

The second time around we didn’t do any of that, ha! Instead of a rehearsal dinner we took everyone bowling and it was a huge hit and surprisingly inexpensive. 

Post # 12
Member
2153 posts
Buzzing bee

We didn’t have any!  We didn’t want an engagement party or a shower and Covid put paid to the rest.

We had planned on having a meal the night before the wedding with those who had travelled long-distance to attend (pre-Covid, we were expecting two families flying in from overseas and one flying cross-country) and I had planned a very simple hen do (afternoon tea and crafting with my four closest friends).  We would have liked to have done both these things, but overall, we’re just grateful we were able to get married at all!

Post # 13
Member
146 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2019 - Hyatt Regency Grand Cypress

No engagement party. We had a co-ed couples shower at a nice seafood restaurant in our town. Most of our guests were actually those who couldn’t attend our destination wedding, so it was nice to celebrate with them in advance. My husband went to Vegas with three of his groomsmen for his bachelor weekend, and I had a day/night the Thursday before my Saturday wedding at our destination location (Orlando). We also hosted a welcome party for everyone who attended the wedding the night before.

Post # 15
Member
3661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

We skipped everything but the rehearsal dinner since we did have a rehearsal. We rented out a room at a BBQ place and it was fun and delicious!

I honestly didn’t have an interest in doing any of the other stuff, though people offered to host them. Just seemed like a lot of extra time and work I could spend doing other things and one celebration (the wedding) was plenty for me.

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