Tell me there is hope!

posted 7 months ago in Parenting
Post # 2
658 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2018

Not sure if you’ve tried turning it into a game? When my son was little I threw a few Cheerios or fruit loops into the toilet and told him to aim for them ( saved my floors and walls too! ) he loved it and it made potty training easier :). 

candy11 :  

Post # 3
780 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

Does he go to school or daycare with other kids? We tried a couple of times with my daughter and failled so I feel you there. Then she went to prechool and saw all the other kids and got it, just like that. From that first day she started wearing pull ups and used the potty and a couple of weeks later she switched to underwear. (She didn’t go to daycare before) So maybe your son is visual too or he’s just not ready. Does he talk (much)? At my daughter 2,5 year appointment the doctor told me, if she isn’t able to tell me she needs to go, potty training won’t work. She went to school a month later and was fine so this wasn’t true for her, but it may be for your son..?

Post # 4
577 posts
Busy bee

Some children take longer, he will let you know when he’s ready. In the meantime, read some potty books, make it fun for him. I used to have a sticker log for my children and they would get a prize. They say boys take longer then girls. 

Post # 5
858 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

I can imagine this must be really frustrating…my son was super quick but we did it over summer and let him be completely free down below. He totally got it when he saw the actual wee running down his legs. Quick let’s catch it in the potty! Matter of days! Also there are some great books. My son still loves ‘Even Firefighters go to the Potty’. Hang in there and GOODLUCK

Post # 6
6317 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

My oldest was the same way. He even once said to me, “You change ___’s (his younger brother’s) diaper; you can change mine.” I realized at that point that he had ME trained instead! So one day we all just pacled up our books and toys and went to the kitchen where there is a tile floor. I told him that we had no more pull-ups and that I could not risk the rugs and furniture getting wet, so that we would be spending our time in the kitchen until he could use the bathroom like a big boy. As I said, it wasn’t a punishment of any sort; we had books and toys and we played together like normal – I just didn’t want to ruin the furniture.

Funny, he was trained THAT DAY (because he didn’t want us to spend the day in the kitchen). He told me didn’t need a pull up overnight; we decided to try it, and sure enough, he was not wet. He never again wet his pants or his bed after that, which isn’t really a success story for me as a parent. As I said, he had me fooled so well that I obviously had him in diapers and pull-ups for far longer than he needed to be, and he only gave them up when I called his bluff!

So I guess from my experience, they will NOT always let you know when they’re ready. Sometimes they are just used to the way things are and have no incentive to change. I absolutely DO NOT believe in any sort of punishment for not using the toilet or for making mistakes, but in our case, a little bit of incentive went a long way. Once my son had a reason to use the toilet, he did, but he did not volunteer for it before that.

Post # 8
2584 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

candy11 :  many people swear by the ‘be naked for three days’ method. I echo the pp who did it in the kitchen. But I’m not a mom yet (13 weeks pregnant) so what do I know?

Post # 9
6446 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

candy11 :  i was going to suggest the three day method too. I’ve attended seminars at work where it’s highly recommended for special needs kids because they learn to associate the sensation without the diaper in place. If they can do it, your son certainly can. I’m planning to try with my son this summer, though he’s a little young. 

Post # 10
3210 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

candy11 :  Honestly, I worked in daycare and potty trained way too many children. I would keep waiting. If you wait until he is genuinely interested and ready (like he tells you I want to wear big boy underwear), it will take like a day or two and he’ll be totally trained. If you try and force it, well… you see what happens! Things can change quickly in a matter of weeks/months at this age so just leave it open and maybe ask him every other week or so if he’d like to pick out underwear to wear. If not, no big deal. 

Post # 11
494 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

We’re in the same boat exactly. We even bought fancy underpants for our son. No luck. We’ve tried bribing etc. I think he’s just not ready. Let me know if you find anything that works! Until then, solidarity in diapers! 

Post # 12
2966 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2006

My daughter started potty training at 2, then we moved so it upset her progress and we didn’t get there until about 2 1/2. In hindsight she probably wasn’t ready at 2 anyway and later on a switch just flipped and she got it. I think potty training was about the most stressful thing for me as a new mom for some reason. 

My dad’s best advice ever: “She’s not going to college in diapers. Calm down.” 

They get there when they get there! Every kid is different. 

Post # 13
2552 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

How far into 3 is he? My son didn’t potty train til after he was 3.5. Boys are typically later potty trainers. You honestly cannot force it, when they’re ready it makes it so much easier for you and your son. Once my son felt ready, he was potty trained basically in a day. Nighttime was a little more difficult but it comes with time. 

Post # 14
9815 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

How far into 3 is he?  If he just turned 3 I would give it more time.  For the most part, I would wait until they are ready and asking to use the potty.  My first was 2.5 (girl) and we waited until she asked both and home and at daycare before we did the 3 day method (we only did 2 days though). Then we switched to underwear after that.  My second is about 26mo and he has been peeing periodically in the potty at home since 18mo but he usually says “no” when asked if he wants to use the potty at daycare.  Last night was the first time in 6mo he has told me he had to poop and said “yes” to using the potty.  I’m still going to wait until he asks at school and then do the same thing (2 days at home and then into underwear).  He’s still pretty young so I’m guessing it may be a few more months.

I don’t think it’s worth the effort to push them into something they are not ready for unless there is a very good reason.  I would just keep offering and make it fun.  Right now my second likes to be naked and strip his diaper and clothes off so I always tell him that he has to wear his diaper since he won’t go poop in the potty.  I tell him when he is ready to poop in the potty he won’t have to wear them anymore.  They have to be emotionally ready in addition to physically.

Post # 15
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2016

candy11 :  I have five sons. With my first son, I had a nurse at a pediatrician’s office tell me that boys will just get it. It might take some time, but it will click for them. My oldest son was a bit older than 3 when it just happened like a light bulb went on! With subsequent kids, the more I pushed “potty training” the more they resisted, until I gave up and just went with the flow. And they all figured it out. When that lightbulb came on (all usually around the time they were 3 or so), there were very few accidents. My one daughter (my second child) figured it out early, but had many accidents for several years. 

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