(Closed) Tell me you REGRET your first look

posted 8 years ago in Photos/Videos
Post # 3
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I’d love to hear this too bc my fi doesn’t want to do one and its making things very. very. complicated!

Post # 5
Member
1940 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Honestly, I was initially very hestitant about doing a first look and absolutely did not want it.  I wanted to wait to see my husband until I walked down the aisle.  Eventually we decided to do it for logistical reasons, and honestly, it was my favorite part of the day.  Sorry, it’s not the answer you’re looking for…  just trying to show it all works out, no matter what you decide (and for whatever reasons).

Post # 6
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’m sorry because I don’t regret mine, but we struggled with it almost our entire engagement. At first I was appalled my photog would even suggest it, then I started to see the light, then went back. Darling Husband and I went back and forth about it, but ultimately decided to do it.

I will give you some downsides though. I had to have my hair and makeup artist stick around for a touchup, since we were gone all day taking pix and I wanted to look nice again for the ceremony. Also, it was really hot that day and I didn’t have time to really freshen up, so I didn’t feel my cleanest by the time the ceremony came around. We all had to get ready really early (starting at 8:00am) when the ceremony wasn’t until 5:00pm. And we STILL weren’t able to do all the photos before the ceremony, since the reality is you can’t force non-wedding party members to be ready at a certain time. I mean, kudos to you if you can, but our families refused to be ready for pix before the ceremony.

But I will say it didn’t take away from the ceremony like a lot of people worry it might. If you’ve seen my wedding video (which I posted a while back), after hours of taking pictures Darling Husband and I were both super emotional during the ceremony, it was really magical.

Post # 7
Member
6009 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

We DIDN’T have a first look, and we’re glad we waited.  🙂  I will never forget the way my husband looked at me when I was walking down the aisle.  He had tears in his eyes, and I was crying, and it was like we were the only two people in the room.  I think the anticipation of waiting to see each other added to the emotions we were already feeling; it was incredible.  I think having a first look can be special, too, but we will never regret foregoing the first look. 

ETA:  I was fine with having a first look, but my husband really wanted to wait.  In the end, it was one of my favorite memories of the day.

Post # 8
Member
171 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’ll chime in–in the the fact that I didn’t do a first look, and that I would really regret having done one because that moment when I turned the corner and saw my now Darling Husband was 100 times worth the wait! IMO it wouldn’t have been as magical if we had already been together and had pictures ect done before the ceremony. I come from a rather traditional family though. I love some of the first look pictures I see though!

Post # 9
Member
6597 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

Or maybe everyone who did a first look loved it!

Are you on the fence about doing a first look or do you know that you don’t want to do one and are just looking for someone who regretted it?

There are many brides on the boards who will NOT do a first look because they want that moment to be the first time their groom sees them. Or they don’t want any pictures taken of them as a couple before they are married. Which are both valid reasons.

However, I am not sure what you are trying to achieve with this post!

Post # 11
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

@FMM: I can’t speak for the OP but I can make a guess that her reasons are the same as mine. I kind of want a first look because it makes so much sense PRACTICALLY. It means more time for pictures and being able to attend the cocktail hour– so it makes a lot of sense, right? Except my Fiance doesn’t want to do one because he thinks it will ruin that “moment” he is supposed to have during the ceremony. I don’t want to push my Fiance into doing something he doesn’t want to do… but at the same time it is SO HARD because all we ever see on the boards is “omg i did a first look and it was sooooooo great.” So I kind of like to hear people say “i’m glad I didn’t do a first look” because it makes me feel like we are not making a mistake by going the traditional route. 

Post # 12
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

Sorry, can’t give you what you want – loved that I had a couple hours of private picture time with my husband before things got crazy! Wouldn’t have it any other way!

Post # 13
Member
405 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

We had a first look and loved it! Lol!

I just wanted to add that even though we did a first look…my husband still got choked up and teary as he watched me walk down the aisle and I was beaming when I saw him there waiting for me…seriously…I had a HUGE goofy smile! lol! The fact that we saw eahcother beforehand didn’t detract from the ceremony at all.

Post # 14
Member
2714 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’m curious about this too — I really, really, really DON’T want a first look. I just feel like there is something special and unique about not seeing my Fiance until that moment of walking down the aisle. I have found that I am a bit more traditional than other brides on the bee though. 🙂 

It makes sense to do it, and I wish I wasn’t so deadset against it, but I think it will feel weird to me to have pictures of us taken before we are actually married and to see him before the ceremony.

Post # 15
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

@CorgiTales: My Darling Husband was also a holdout for a while, I had to convince him in the end to do it. The way I saw it was we were going to see each other that day at some point. Why does it have to be when I’m walking down the aisle? We still didn’t spend the night before together and we got ready separately. And we were really ABOUT to get married when we first saw each other. Our first look was at 1:30 and the ceremony was at 5:00pm.We got to do it in private (minus the camera crew) and the major upside was we didn’t have a gap between the ceremony and reception. Otherwise we would have since we wanted a lot of photojournalistic shots of the two of us. People who don’t care about that can probably skip it, but we wanted it.

And it was REALLY fun to go all around Philly that day with my groom in my wedding gown. That was awesome, I will never forget it.

 

Post # 16
Member
1820 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I will give you my very honest answer, although it is not what you want to hear.

I don’t remember anything about my ceremony, or most of my reception.  There is so much going on, so many emotions, so many people to talk to, so many obligations.  People walked down the aisle in completely the wrong order did not sit where they were supposed to – and I didn’t even notice until I got my pictures back.  I have no idea what my husband’s face said when I was walking down the aisle.  I have bits and pieces of memories – twisting off my engagement ring half-way through the ceremony because I realized I had forgotten to take it off, laughing because I forgot my ring vows and said the wrong thing.  But that’s about it.

I do, however, have wonderful, lovely memories of the calm and relaxation I felt during our first look.  I have great memories (and great pictures!) of my husband’s face when he saw me for the first time.  I treasure the hour we spent – just the two of us and our photographer – holding hands, walking around the estate, drinking champagne, and taking pictures.  That was the most relaxed and happy I felt all day, and that experience cemented in my mind the importance of the day – that I was marrying this man, and that the rest was just window dressing.

I also LOVE that I got to enjoy my cocktail hour.

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