(Closed) Tell me you REGRET your first look

posted 11 years ago in Photos/Videos
Post # 32
Member
313 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I did a first look and did not consider at all waiting until the ceremony. Our ceremony and reception were at the same location, and I did not want to have an extended break between the ceremony and reception to take pictures. I also did not want to miss the cocktail hour, because I love cocktail hour!

I also was glad to be able to have my then-fiance around for support during the early hours of the wedding day. It seems weird to me that the tradition is to not see each other before the wedding, when that is a stressful day and you are pledging to be support systems for each other in times of stress!

Waiting until the ceremony to see each other may be the right choice for you, but it does not mean that other people who chose to have a first look have to regret it to justify that choice for someone else. Some people do a first look and love it, and some people wait and love it.

Post # 33
Member
1799 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

@2peasinapod Oh i know there is no “right” or wrong way in this situation..and thats the point! Like PP after me…no one knows which one is better as you have done either one or the other and will think that choice is best. It just seems there is always posts about “should I or shouldnt I do a first look” and then its just a constant stream of do it bc its such a special moment…and then dont do it cause its such a special moment.

Basically PitBullLover sumed up what i was trying to say 🙂

Post # 34
Member
805 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I don’t regret the first look, but the whole thing was just stupid. It didn’t feel emotional to me at all. I think Fiance and I could have just met up by the limo for pictures and that would have been fine, lol

So first look was dumb, but taking the majority of our pictures before the ceremony was probably the smartest planning decision I made. It truly made the day run smoothly and we were able to mingle at our cocktail hour right after the ceremony.

Also, when I walked down the aisle I was feeling very emotional. I think I would have been fullo ut crying if that was the first time I saw my hubby.

My opinion…first look premise is dumb, but taking pictures before the ceremony is a really smart idea!

Post # 36
Member
1211 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

If you do a first look, your husband still sees you for the first time, and it can be as dramatic as you want it to be. We did it because it saved a TON of time for photographs, it was  REALLY fun-we were in the lobby of the hotel where we were getting married, I came down the stairs and I felt like princess Diana or a movie star or something. A bunch of random people started clapping and cheering when he turned around. It wasn’t intimate, but it wouldn’t have been at the ceremony either so I wasn’t too worried about that. I loved every second of it! Afterwards we walked around Philly (where we live) and tooks some awesome pics-it was so fun to be in my wedding gown and going to places that I usually frequent in jeans.

Incidentally, I don’t remember a thing about walking down the asile, I can’t even remember hearing the music so if you do go that route I recommend mentally practicing having all of your wits about you and mentally preparing to notice everything, because it is totally nerve wracking. When I think about that part now all I see is black space and hearing cameras.

EDT: Sorry-I thought this said tell me you DON’T regret your first look!

Post # 37
Member
153 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010 - The Atlantic Beach Club

I was originally on the fence about the first look. Mr Starfish was really opposed to it, so we decided to skip it. I was extremely surprised that the walk down the aisle, seeing him for the first time was my absolute favorite moment of the day. I literally locked eyes with him and it was this totally surreal moment.

That being said, we had a gap between the cermeony and reception, so we had plenty of time for photos. We were able to take great photos and still make it to our coktail hour. I think if you have logistical reasons why it wouldn’t work, it makes sense to do the first look. I know so many people who loved the first look, but I think no matter when you see each other it will be special. Your photographer can still capture your husband’s face and your reaction if you have 2 shooters.

Post # 38
Member
201 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@Baileyh:  I am actually really enjoying this thread.  Some of us are really torn and it helps to read about other people’s experiences.  I can see where maybe you have read this thread a million times before, but not all of us have. 

Post # 39
Member
4460 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

It depends on what kind of couple you are. We live together and have sex mostly every night. At this point we aren’t even sure if we are going to walk down the aisle. I mean, if we do, it will probably be together as equals. My dad is no longer living. Who knows…I’m not that far yet. Anyway, I don’t see the difference in the magical look whether it’s before or during the ceremony. Either way, you are both seeing each other before you are married. We want to do a first look because we want a private moment to ourselves before everyone surrounds us the rest of the day, and we want time to get lots of photos so we can enjoy our cocktail hour and enjoy time with our guests. Some of his family will be flying in from Ireland and we want to spend as much time with them as we can.

it’s not for everyone, and you have to be really honest with yourself. Don’t try to force something you won’t be comfortable with. We don’t see it as “seeing each other for the first time.” so that’s probably why we are more comfortable with it.

Post # 40
Member
821 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@cabanagrl9: yeah I’m with you. I’m still really on the fence about this one, so reading everyone’s responses is really helpful to me.

Post # 41
Member
2593 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@Baileyh: EXACTLY! Either way there’s a first look, it just depends on if it’s before or during the ceremony. We did a first look and LOVED it! Such a special moment, some amazing pictures, and we got to drive around in a golf cart and take pictures together! Plus, we got to enjoy all of our private cocktail hour with the bridal party. Win-win-WIN!

Post # 42
Member
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I don’t regret doing it, I just regret how it was done.  I always seen it as the bride sneeking up on the groom so I assumed that’s what we were going to do but instead our photgrapher had me wait and the groom come up behind me.  I wish I spoken up about it cuz he’s already seen my hair and makeup trail so if he walks up behind me there wasn’t that much of a surprise since he can kinda see the dress as he’s walking up.

otherwise I loved how we had time to do all our portraits beforehand and then spend some time during the cocktail hour to take more photos of just us.

Post # 43
Member
1407 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

We didn’t do one, and I’m glad the first time we saw each other was at the ceremony.

Post # 44
Member
201 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@Miss Tattoo:  I am digging your response, but what does sex everynight have to do with a first look?  hahahahahaha.  It is pretty impressive though!

Post # 45
Member
340 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’m super glad we did, and my guests actually appreciated it too!  I’ve gotten MULTIPLE people saying how nice it was that our wedding flowed so well – we went straight from the ceremony into dinner, no time in between for pics, since we had gotten them all earlier in the day!  It was great!  sorry, no regrets here. Wink

Post # 46
Member
211 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

It was actually some of the only “alone time” we got to spend together that day. We were together most of the day, but we were always surrounded by other people and there was always something going on. The first look and the hour after that we spent taking photos was super special and intimate, even though our photographers were there. Once that time was over, the rest of the day was like a whirlwind, so I’m really glad we had that time together.

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