tell my ex husband im getting married??

posted 7 years ago in Encore
  • poll: do i need to inform my ex husband im getting married?
    yes- especially if you still have some kind of ties with him : (30 votes)
    30 %
    heck no : (69 votes)
    70 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    7431 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    he’s an ex for a reason, you don’t owe him anything. Are either of you paying alimony? That would be about the only reason you would have to tell him

    Post # 4
    Member
    6015 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Why would you tell him?  It’s none of his business and it’s not like you have kids together.  the less he knows about what’s going on in your life the better.

    Post # 5
    Member
    236 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    nope dont tell him!!! if you dont have any children involved he doesnt need to know

    Post # 6
    Member
    5181 posts
    Bee Keeper

    nope, say nothing

    Post # 7
    Member
    7431 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    so, 4 people have said yes, but didn’t respond to explain why???

    Post # 7
    Member
    7431 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    so, 4 people have said yes, but didn’t respond to explain why???

    Post # 8
    Member
    827 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    @MrsSl82be: I said yes because I agreed with the point you said.  I guess I wouldn’t tell him if there’s nothing attached, but the preface of “yes-especially if you still have some kind of ties with him” made me say yes.  If anything, I would check with the attorneys who still might be handling your assets to ensure that you getting married doesn’t change anything in the divorce agreement.  If it makes no difference in terms of legal proceedings or with foreclusing your assets then no, you have no obligation.  I just wonder if there is some way (considering the divorce, from what it sounds like, was not amicable) he could use this new marriage against you. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    7431 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    @NauticalBride2011: I get your point, which is why I asked about alimony. I definitely think its a good idea to discuss with her attorney, but not something to discuss with her ex.  

    Post # 10
    Member
    602 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I think telling him is the bigger person thing to do. He’ll probably find out eventually, so you may as well mention it and get it out of the way. A good way to do it would be in one of your phone calls, right at the end, just say something like, by the way, I just wanted to let you know that I’m getting married again. If he gets upset or starts yelling or something you can always hang up.

    Post # 11
    Member
    2600 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    As long as you have no legal reason to tell him based on your shared assets – I wouldn’t.  I’m not telling mine, though we still have some mutual friends on Facebook, so I’m sure he’s found out, but I didn’t make it a point.

    As long as your lawyer finds no reason to, don’t worry about it.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1843 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I would talk to your attorney like a previous poster said and see if your marriage will affect the jointly owned property.  If it does, then yes, I would tell him.  If no, then I wouldn’t.

    Post # 14
    Member
    827 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I don’t know where you live, but many law schools have clinics where students volunteer.  You could maybe see if they can help.  But I would have someone look over your assets agreements just to make sure that there’s no way he can try to take things from you.  Any legal bees have any advice?

    Post # 15
    Member
    1843 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    There are also legal forums online – I would definitely find one and post your scenario and see what they say.  If you and the ex don’t get along, I would definitely be ensuring previous to the new marriage that this can’t come back on you and your Fiance (and your new house or anything else).

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