Post # 1
I’ve been feeling discouraged lately. Seems like month by month, I’m gaining more weight than losing it. No matter how I’m working out or making healthier choices, I’m still gaining. My aunt made a comment recently saying that I’m using the cartoon pic on my Facebook because I’m too fat to be seen. So my mom suggested that I should get Lap-Band surgery. But Fiance wants me to keep trying. He doesn’t want me too skinny, just healthy for my own sake.
I just don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve been yo-yoing for years and every time I gain weight, I gain everything back and then some. It’s so bad that all I’m wearing are sweats and yoga pants because they fit me. I’m also planning to give up birth control altogether to help me lose weight. My mom felt that ever since I went back on the Pill, I gained the weight.
All I want is my face to look back to normal (and not look like a balloon) and to tone up to my previous size.
Post # 3
@BeeRod527: First off, HUGS! Second, I knew someone who did lap-band and it worked great for them. It’s a personal choice. If you feel comfortable with it and do your research then go for it!
My bestfriend in highschool always had a belly. People would always ask her if she was pregnant, she just couldn’t loose weight. She ate wayyyyy healthier then I did and worked out.
Post # 4
If you don’t mind my asking, what’s your current BMI?
Also, what health issues do you have which limit your activity, how much activity do you do every day and of what kind, and how are your tracking your food choices?
If applicable, describe a typical day from your food diary.
Now, I have also struggled to lose weight recently, but when I was a lot larger then it was easy peasy, so maybe other bees and I could offer diet and exercise advice?
Post # 5
That’s awful that your aunt said that. And I’m so sorry you’re feeling discouraged. I can’t really give you advice about whether you should get surgery, because I’m not a doctor and I don’t know your health situation. My only advice would be to talk to your doctor about it and see what they say.
My only weight-loss tip is doing the Whole 30, but it’s more of a get-healthy thing than a weight-loss thing, though many people lose weight on it. I’ve found that I feel so much healthier after I cut out refined sugar, dairy, legumes and grains. I have energy and all my digestive problems went away, and I don’t weigh myself but I think I may have lost a couple pounds too.
Whatever decision you make, do it because you want to be healthy, not because you want to conform to a ridiculous socially constructed standard for women. Your Fiance loves you just the way you are.
You will get through this I promise.
Post # 6
@Rachel631: BMI has been pretty thoroughly shown to be a poor indicator of health. She should have her doctor measure her body fat percentage instead.
Post # 7
Have you had your thyroid checked? Sometimes this can lead to unexplained weight gain and difficulty in losing weight. Good luck!
Post # 9
Have you gotten your thyroid and other bloodwork checked? If you are truly making the food changes, and working out, yet still gaining weight, there may be something else at play. Many, many people who get that surgery bounce back to their pre-surgery weight, so definitely do the research necessary before taking such drastic measures.
Post # 10
@BeeRod527: (((HUGS))) What your aunt said was completely inappropriate and I would let her know how it made you feel. Try not to let other people discourage you. And I applaud your FH for being supportive and not pushy.
My mom has had issues with her weight her whole life. She and my dad are both on Weight Watchers and dad has been losing way more than mom. Recently, she decided to cut out wheat and gluten totally in addition to keeping with her Weight Watchers points. WHAT A DIFFERENCE! That was obviously the thing that was holding her back. Ever since she cut out the wheat and gluten, the pounds have been melting off!! Try different tweaks to your diet before you jump into surgery.
Post # 11
your aunt is a bitch! who says that?! Anyways, you should talk to your doctor if you’ve given it your all with weight loss and aren’t budging. Ultimately, it’s about your health not what you look like. You’ll need to rule out any medical conditions (e.g., thyroid issues) that is causing your weight gain/inability to lose weight). Also, you’ll need to tackle any emotional eating issues if any that you have. I know someone that had surgery and she was a hard core binge eater and couldn’t stop eating once she had the surgery – and as you know, it can be not only uncomfortable, but also dangerous to eat large quantities afterwards. Good luck, hun! Do what’s best for your physical and emotional health and wellbeing!
Post # 12
@AdriannaJean: Whilst I realise this, it depends on just how big you are. If you are overweight and you KNOW that you are storing it as fat, it’s a pretty good tool. It’s only when you reach the normal weight range, or you are extremely fit, that it’a not a great indicator.
It’s also not great if you are very tall or very short, because it is normalised along a bell curve for height. But it is a good indicator for a lady of average height who is not carrying much extra muscle mass.
Post # 13
@s2bmrscook: +1 Yeah, definitely try cutting out gluten before doing anything drastic. I’ve seen some pretty amazing success stories when people get rid of it. The book Wheat Belly explains the science behind it pretty well. And it’s not misguided “low carb” advice, have carbs, just not from wheat.
Post # 14
@Rachel631: But that’s the problem, the “normal weight range” dictated by the BMI scales doesn’t work for a lot of people. It would say that my Fiance is pretty overweight when he isn’t. It says I’m at a normal weight and I’m carrying way too much around. I know a girl who, granted, could stand to lose some weight, but is told she is “obese” by the BMI scale when the reality is that she has a large frame; even if she had way less body fat than she needed, her BMI would say she’s overweight. There are some cases when it’s useful, sure, but the amount of people it misleads is significant enough that it shouldn’t be used.
Post # 15
Firstly.. It definitely sounds like there are underlying medical issues to your not being able to lose weight regardless of diet and exersize. I have found that losing weight is all mathematical because I have a VERY slow metabolism that runs in my family. You calculate your BMR (basal metabolic rate) which is the amount of calories your body burns by doing nothing daily, add 20 percent if you’re not that active, 30 if moderate, 40 if quite and 50 if extremely. So for example, for my height, weight and gender, I burn 1700 by doing nothing, an added 20% is 2000 calories, so if I have a deficit of 500 calories a day by eating right or working out, I can lose up to a pound a week (3500 calories, 7 days X 500 calories a day), and it works for me! I know it sounds confusing, and it can be annoying to track everything (I use a great app called “Lose it!” to count everything) but it is a numbers game in my experience. Of coarse this can vary if you have a very slow motabolism and/or thyroid issues. I would definitely go get some blood work done to figure that out and then try doing the numbers game.
Secondly, you are beautiful!! I know this because I looked at a previous post on your page and found picture of you in your dress, you have lovely curves and rock the dresses you were wearing. Also – it sounds like your Fiance loves you no matter what.. health is important but being happy with yourself is important too! As long as you’re taking the steps to eat healthy and exersize regularily, you are doing the best you can, it’s not easy, I know because I have to work very hard at it to see any results. At the end of the day, you’re getting married! And he is marrying you, the person inside, not the waistline! *hugs* I know how being discouraged feels but definitely visit some other avenues before drastic surgery. If that is the best option for you, go for it! Many people are happy with the results.
Post # 16
@BeeRod527: I’ve had bariatric surgery and let me tell you it will not cure obesity or magically fix any eatting problems/disorders. I had what is called verticle sleeve gastrectomy, opting for this surgery to help me get on the right track to a healthier life. I did lots of research and chose this surgery as the upkeep on the band and so many reported issues with wasn’t worth me driving 1.5 hours every 6 weeks for a check up. And gastric bypass was to severy for the amount of weight I needed to loose.
Just so you are aware, you physician will likely want you on a 6 month monitored diet, you will be given a goal of loosing approx. 105 of your current body wwight as they want to make sure you can adhere to the rules of this diet. I can tell you it’s painful and for the first 3 weeks I regreted ever doing it, then I things got better, the pain subsided and I started to see results and I’ve lost 86lbs to date.
This is not something you just decide to do. Please try onlyour own first then consult your physician, go to the classes and meetings and meet with other bariatric patients to see what their stuggles are and how they deal with everything.
I found http://www.obesityhelp.com very helpful, you can choose a specific surgery in the forums section and ask questions and the peopl there are very helpful and I watched alot of youtube vlogs documenting ppls weightloss with different surgeries.