- 5 years ago
So, here’s the condensed version of why I don’t have a good relationship with my dad and stepmother:
They’re kind of those people who want to show off their child like a prize (not always a bad thing, but stick with me). My stepmom wanted me to go to college and major in science. She sent me to college via a special program when I was 16. I couldn’t handle the workload and my GPA lost and I was 1200 miles from home and wanted to transfer closer. That was part one of me being a “disappointment”. I transfered closer to home, and they’d get mad because I wanted to visit family or them or my boyfriend at the time (mostly family, seriously). I switched majors because I wasn’t good at science but it was insisted that I take foreign languages and at least one science class a semester plus what was needed for my degree and I was supposed to graduate on time, which wasn’t possible in that situation. I ended up leaving college after I turned 18 because my GPA was shot from the classes I couldn’t handle. I got married and I got divorced a year later (he cheated, got on cocaine, and drank constantly, and started coming home at about 2am every night).
I had a best friend during all this, and we’re together now. We were friends for 3 years, before starting to date a little over a year ago. We want to get engaged this year.
Here’s the hard part- While at Christmas at my dad’s, I was asked why I was “tying myself down” and wasn’t “open to dating more people”. I’m incredibly happy with my SO. I learned a lot from my mistakes and won’t make the same ones again. We share the same values and goals. He’s supportive and responsible. Everything I could ask for. But I don’t think they’ll really give their blessing. My mom and stepdad adore him and my mom asks when we’re getting engaged all the time. How do I handle things with the other side, though? Do I just do what makes me happy? I’ve never made them proud, and I don’t really know what to do. I don’t care that much what they think, but I’m afraid that maybe I should.