(Closed) Terrible Bridesmaids/MOHs.. What about the good?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 16
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Country Club

I’m getting married in September and have four bm’s (my three BFF’s and SIL) they have been secretly facebook group messaging. I love all of them so much. My Maid/Matron of Honor drove with me and my mom to Boston to go dress shopping with my aunts and I went bridesmaids dress shopping with 3/4 of them to make sure they all were happy with the dress I picked. One of my bm’s went to the florist with me and all of them are always checking up on me asking if I need help with anything. 

I just started a migraine med I’ve taken before and my memory is shot because of it so my Maid/Matron of Honor sat down with me last night and helped me brainstorm a list of everything I need to work on still. I would truly be lost without these girls. I have known all of them for more than 10 years, some way longer than that!

Post # 17
193 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

View original reply
rendezvous89:  I really like this thread. I have posted on here before about a couple of ny bridesmaids (though really one in particular) who has caused some problems (not in terms of fulfilling expectations but other stuff) . I have two incredible bridesmaids though. My sister who is my maid of honour has been amazing, she is younger than me and we have always been close but I feel like during the time I’ve been planning the wedding she’s become my best friend as much as she is ny sister and I really love that!

My other bm has also just been a great support even though she lives in another country. She’s always totally honest if I ask her opinion which I love and really appreciate and is just always such a great friend, hence why I need her by ny side on the day!

Post # 18
855 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I had the greatest bridal party ever!  My Maid/Matron of Honor is extremely creative and took the lead in planning my bridal shower with my mum, including running the evening, coming up with all the games and baking a colour coordinated cake for the event.  They all helped to decorate for the event, too.  I didn’t ask for any of this.

We went together to select the dresses, I wanted her to choose something that she’d enjoy wearing.  She drove 1.5hrs to see me in my dress and learn how to tie the bustle.

At our stag and doe, my Maid/Matron of Honor and one Bridesmaid or Best Man worked the room, selling tickets and recruiting people to participate in games and activities.  The other Bridesmaid or Best Man donated movie tickets for us to raffle off, she couldn’t make it (understandably, she’s LD and has no car).

The day of, they were amazing.  Helping hold my dress while I walked, dabbing my face when it was shiny, making sure I drank enough water, telling me how beautiful I looked, etc.  My Maid/Matron of Honor is not a fan of public speaking and boy, did she surprise me!  She and my cousin (BM) blew me away with their speeches.  My Maid/Matron of Honor also made our favours, beautifully packaged mini colour-coordinated macarons.

My thank you cards were pretty disgustingly barfy, but rightly so, they went above and beyond what I expected from them!

So yes, there are such things as amazing, drama-free bridesmaids… 🙂

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 7 months ago by danier.
Post # 19
1575 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Dallas, TX

I felt so so loved during my bachelorette party. Half the girls drove down early to decorate the hotel. When I got there it was completely decked out with bachelorette stuff and really cute sign about my relationship with each girl at the party. We had SO much fun! Everyone was really there for me and there was no drama. Second best weekend of my life after the wedding weekend.

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 7 months ago by kimmo416.
Post # 20
578 posts
Busy bee

Love this thread idea!

My cousin is one of my bridesmaids, and she’s gone SO far above and beyond. When I originally asked her to be a bridesmaid, she was moving from Canada to Europe, so I asked if she’d be one if she’d moved back to Canada (she was originally moving for one year, and my wedding was around the one year mark).

Well, she’s staying there for longer, but has already bought her flight tickets. AND before she moved, she took the train 4 hours to come wedding dress shopping with me (I made it very clear that she was under zero pressure to come, and we’d happily Skype her in, but she was excited to participate).

Her and my sister (my MOH) are SO excited about wedding planning, they listen to me obsess over little details happily — they’re genuinely excited (I’ve asked them a million times if it’s getting old, and try to not go overboard, but when I don’t tell them all the little details they say they miss hearing about them and want them).

And all of my bridesmaids were super easy when it came to the look, accessories, etc. I’m so insanely lucky. 

Post # 21
1413 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

My matron of honor is my best friend, and she lives literally across the country (America… so a big country).  And yet, she has been available to send dress photos too during shopping, she’s talked me through my Future Mother-In-Law nightmare situations, and she is beyond thrilled to be a part of my wedding day.  She wants to plan a shower and a bachelorette with my sister (maid of honor) despite how far away she is, and has already offered to fly here for that in addition to for the wedding.

Post # 22
29 posts
  • Wedding: July 2015

I had a horrible experience with my Maid/Matron of Honor and BMs. They ignored my calls/texts about the wedding, didn’t order dresses on time, didn’t want to plan a shower, basically complained about everything and offered no support. Even told me I was crazy for asking them to take TWO days off work for the rehearsal and wedding, which they knew about a year and a half ahead of time. My Maid/Matron of Honor even booked her hotel for the wrong day, she had a save-the-date AND invitation with the date on it. We’d been friends since elementary school. I was dumbfounded how my friends could treat me this way.

However, a few weeks before my wedding I reached out to an old friend, she actually used to be my boss a few years ago, and always had great advice for me. I was so frustrated and stressed from dealing with the drama my BMs and Maid/Matron of Honor were giving me, I needed to reach out to someone for advice. She and I got talking and she was so supportive and asked me to come over for wine and chocolate and offered to listen while I let out all my frustrations. She asked what I needed help with, grabbed a notebook, made a list and said she was going to do everything she could to right their wrongs. She told me I deserved friends who would stand by me through this time in my life. I ended up asking her to be in my wedding just a few months before! She was the only one who offered me any help, support, and just was a great friend to me. I don’t think I would have made it to my wedding day without her, she truly saved me and now we are closer than ever. As for the others, we rarely talk and don’t see eachother anymore. I’m happy it worked out that way. I found out the hard way who my real friends were. <3

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 7 months ago by julybride93.
  • This reply was modified 6 years, 7 months ago by julybride93.
Post # 23
87 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I have two awesome BM! 🙂

My best friend is my first wonderful Bridesmaid or Best Man.  She was suppsed to be my Maid/Matron of Honor, can’t make the wedding because of $$.  (I’m not upset, its just the hazard of having a best friend who lives on another continent.)  My almost-MOH has been awesome with everything prewedding-related.  She has been helping me pick out dresses and flowers through text and pintrest, as well as listenting to my wedding drama.  So she is so lovely, but she won’t actually be there at the wedding to stand up with us (so sad).  

My second Bridesmaid or Best Man, well, lets just say she belongs in one of those other posts…

So I asked my cousin to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man last weekend, kind of out of desperation because I know she is coming to the wedding, but she has been amazing.  In one week she has tried on dresses (with small children in tow), helped me pick out my jewelley, and started looking at shoes and jewellery for her and the other Bridesmaid or Best Man. All this energy has actually shamed my second Bridesmaid or Best Man into being more helpful too!  So relieved!!!

Post # 24
35 posts
  • Wedding: March 2015

We didn’t have a wedding party but my best friend did a kind of Maid/Matron of Honor role. She was amazing. Despite being a single mother working full time she took time off work to come to fittings with me, listened to me for hours about wedding crap, made my button/brooch bouquet, surprised us with a photo album she made of our lives having collected photos of us as kids from our families and wrote an amazing poem about my and DH’s relationship that she read in the ceremony which was so emotional. I’m so lucky to have her and hope I get to do the same for her one day. 

Post # 25
1306 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

View original reply
rendezvous89:  i had the most AMAZING bridesmaids (all 9 of them!). i really can’t say enough good about them. my Maid/Matron of Honor plus 3 of the others went to 2 rounds of dress shopping with me, planned the most beautiful shower and bachelorette weekend, just really thought of everything and were so easy to deal with. it was amazing…

my favorite – they all know i’m not really into lingerie, so they went in together and bought me a pair of Duke University cowboy boots as my “shower” gift. it was the best. i feel so blessed and lucky.

Post # 26
2921 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

My Maid/Matron of Honor was my bestie and that lady was unreal. She stayed up til three am every night the week before my wedding, despite working a full time job, to perfect my gorgeous, free of charge wedding cake. She helped me pick out my flowers and then put together my bouquets and boutineers all by herself. She did my hair, my SILs hair, my mums hair on the day with no complaints. She got up with me at six am and helped me stay calm and get ready. She made it SO fun. I could not have done it without her. Love that girl to death!

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