(Closed) Terrible New Year's Eve.. please read :(posted 8 years ago in Waiting
- 8 years ago
@Claire324: maybe he isn’t ready…yet. is that such a bad thing? you need to talk to him honestly and understand exactly what his new timelines are so you can make a valid decision on your future. if hes genuine with you and explains exactly why hes not ready and gives you a new timeline well then fair enough. if he continues to be wishy washy then you should have a good think about if thats acceptable for you to continue. i know 6 months ago on the bee i was pretty frustrated too my SO wasn’t ready, and he didn’t know why not! we’d been together 3 years, lived together for 2. and he just wasn’t ready. After posting on the bee of course everyone said oh forget about it he’s wasting your time, cos on paper i admit it looked like he was. We had a pretty emotional row that night and we nearly finished things. I decided to stay and trust him that he wasn’t leading me on. He proposed 4 days ago and suprised me by picking the ring completely by himself, and telling his parents weeks before it happened i had no clue. he told me i should have trusted him when he said he wasn’t ready but that it would happen. so my advice is to trust your gut on your guy and have a calm talk. its pretty easy to sit here and type when you’re feeling at your lowest and point out all the bad stuff, we’ve all had days like that.
- 8 years ago
@Bettyboo1982: Thank you for your advice. Typing it out on here was a good way to let it all out in an anonymous way and not completely blow up my relationship. I’m just going to let it settle for a bit before I have a talk with him, because now I am slightly unsure of what I want. I wanted to get married when it was early and special and romantic, not just a logical next step… and I certainly didn’t want to if I pressured him though. He knows how I felt now.
I think I’m still pretty hurt. A lot of the romance and shinyness has worn off and I wonder whether I even need to get married within the next few years. If he doesn’t want me then that is fine! The relationship is fine as it is so I guess I’ll just take a step back and work on myself. If it’s not meant to be, then that is completely okay. I am sad and wondering whether the relationship might have a time limit though
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