(Closed) terrified of being a fat bride am I the only one?(dresses)

posted 7 years ago in Dress
Post # 2
Member
472 posts
Helper bee

Sounds like you hit the nail on the head when you said you are a perfectionist. Perhaps you’d benefit more from working on that issue than from working on your already-healthy weight…

Post # 3
Member
161 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

I’m going to be honest and say #1 You look fabulous and gorgeous.  When I first went dress shopping the first dress I tried on was beautiful but in all honesty all I could think about was how big I felt.  In the next dress it kind of made me feel worse because it wouldn’t fit over my booty.  I’m not fat, but I have curves.  Things look different and it makes us feel bad when the super model is a size 00 and has the tiny waste, but everyone looks different.  Embrace how gorgeous you look!

I love the mermaid look on you, you have the perfect body for it! And the boobies for the neckline on #2!

Post # 4
Member
556 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Also vote you need to work in your self esteem. It’s so hard to love ourselves, trust me. When you say that you’re worried about being a fat bride, imagine what larger brides think that means about themselves? 

You are stunning and as someone who cannot gain weight and is tiny I would love your body! Dress number one I amazing on you!

Post # 5
Member
1979 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Dude, you are crazy!  99% of American population would kill to weigh 135 lbs. Work on your self esteem and learn to love your body. I have the same “specifications” as you and I love the way I look. Dress #1 is amazing on you. You have the perfect shape and can rock anything you want. 

Post # 6
Member
5528 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
futuremrscopeland:  I felt the same. At my heaviest (which happened to be when I got my dress) I was 144lbs, which at 5’7″ was far from overweight. But, I’ve always been extremely slim (never more than 126lb) and I felt fat and frumpy. I also have a small bone structure, and that combined with the fact my diet was atrocious, made me know I wanted to lose weight. I went on a diet way before the wedding and lost weight really slowly, hitting my target of 120lb a year before, and pretty much maintaining it (I did gain a few lbs in the winter, but shifted it again). I felt so much happier on the day than I would have done when I was heavier. 

I’ve gained quite a bit since (back up to 133lb) so plan to slim down again (been really depressed recently and have CFS so have been unable to exercise), this time to around 122lb which is more maintainable. 

So,I totally get how you feel. You do look great, but if you don’t feel great, I see no issue with dieting if you would feel it would help. It’s irrelevant IMO what other people weigh; it’s how YOU feel that matters. I also don’t think you have issues or are being a perfectionist, FWIW. 

Post # 7
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I know how you feel, chin up! I don’t necessarily think you have huge self esteem issues, I think you just feel uncomfortable, its normal! I’m 5ft ive put on 5 kilos in the last year and people look at me like im crazy because to other people its not much at all but to me I feel huge! I’m only short so it feels like more plus we know our bodies and what we are comfortable with, we notice more and feel more.

So your not alone! But you do look fabulous from us outsiders looking in. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 9
Member
524 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

View original reply
futuremrscopeland: First off, I think you look great – I vote dress 1 ๐Ÿ™‚ But I feel the same way about myself sometimes. I gained a lot of weight recently – almost 20 pounds. I used to be anywhere between 106 and 112 and now I am 130! That’s overwhelming for my 5’1″ self. Technically I am a healthy BMI, but I don’t like BMI scales anyway. Even being a “healthy” BMI, I sure don’t look good because I am short. People tell my that I’m crazy too for wanting to lose weight but they don’t understand how hard it is when you’re used to being one way for practically your whole life then all of a sudden you get bigger. And white just makes me look larger, so I end up feeling horrible. I picked a dress but I really hope I can get to my average weight before the wedding so I look better in it. Good luck! You can do it, you have a good ways to go until March ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 10
Member
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

First off, that first dress is crazy gorgeous on you. You are rocking those classic curves in that dress, I’d hate to see you flatten them all out!

I came in here expecting to see someone that was actually overweight, which you are clearly not, so you calling yourself fat can be really disheartening for women who are actually struggling with being overweight. You have what I (and science) would consider a perfect body, and the fact that you still think you’re fat just makes me sad for you and society. If you want to lose more weight to feel better about yourself and do it the healthy way, go for it, but I’m not going to pretend like you need to or that it will make you any more beautiful if you do.

Post # 11
Member
470 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

i dont think you look fat at all. I think you have beautiful curves but arent like a big girl. I think you should just have a good workout routine to tone up a bit and then you wont have to worry too much about un pleassant wobbly bits. Also just gettign a dress that is flattering will help.

Post # 12
Member
911 posts
Busy bee

I’m with those that say it may be a better idea to work on your self esteem/image of self than go crazy working on your body. You look great and if you don’t have a problem with how you look in regular every day situations then just imagine how you’ll look all dolled up in a gown? amazing!! i’d think.

I’m the same height as you and about 60lbs heavier and I’m concerned about losing too much weight before my wedding lol. My biggest concern is I want to tone up without losing much and then how to make sure I maintain once I get to where I want to be. I think finding a dress that works and makes you feel great the way you are right now is the way to go. Weddings are enough stress to add quick weight loss to the equation.

Post # 13
Member
1641 posts
Bumble bee

Lady, I think you need a bit of perspective. There are FAR more worse things than being a “fat bride”.

You’ll look beautiful regardless if you lose a few pounds or not. Just live a healthy lifestyle and look less at the scale.

Post # 14
Member
1070 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

 

View original reply
futuremrscopeland:  I totally understand how you feel!  I am the same height and was always around the 120 – 125 mark but as I have gotten older – darn it.  I was 145-ish when I was trying on dresses and it was a big eye opener for me.  Its slowly coming down although I have gained a few back.  FOr me though I just wasnt doing enough physical activity and just felt down.  I am only down to 137 but really would like to be down to 130 and more fit then caring about getting to 125 (besides I think the alterations would be too much if I lost that much and there probably isnt time lol).

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