(Closed) Texan girl marrying a Brit… let the complications ensue.

posted 8 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2010

Hi Tuna, 

I might be able to help a little because I live and was married in Wales 🙂

Firstly congratulations, and can I commend you on an excellent country of choice for marriage! Just to warn you when dealing with registras, vendors, Mr Tuna’s family/friends etc. the Welsh are an incredibly proud nation and are not a massive fan of being called English! I’d hate for you to get a negative reaction for this small thing!

Unfortunately, religious ceremonies are strict. I’m not sure I know of any religious ministers who will marry you outside a religious building e.g. church and the state registras are only legally allowed to marry you in a properly registered building. This could be the registry office, city hall, and specially licensed hotels, museums, castles etc. We really don’t go for outdoor venues as much as in other countries, mainly because of the weather here! No lovely texan days for the British!

As you say i’m not sure i know of any of the main Christian denominations who will do a full wedding ceremony (rather than the marriage blessing) if you’re already married. However if you haven’t done so check with the church in wales as they are the most lenient of the Christian churches. I have been to marriage blessings though and they are lovely and formal and certainly feel very real – if you see what i mean. It might be worth asking to see the wording of the ceremony before ruling it out, it might not be as bad as you fear!

I have been to an outdoor humanist ceremony in the UK. The couple had a fab outdoor venue near a lake. The day before the “public” wedding they went to their local registry office and married legally and the following day had a full wedding inc. dress, wedding party, readings, formal dinner etc. Thank goodness the weather was amazing which was a risk and the humanist minister was great. She worked with them on creating the service and had religious elements and definitely pronounced them man and wife! They had originally asked a friend to be the officiant but he couldn’t do it due to work commitments but the humanist minister they used was great and i would definitely recommend looking into that option. 

I’m sorry you’re disappointed about the differences with options over here, but both the wedding blessing and the humanist option might not be as bad as you think – good luck with whatever you decided and i wish you a lovely Welsh wedding 🙂

 

Post # 5
Member
353 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Hi Tuna,

I’m a foreigner marrying in England too so I know all about it! To tell you the truth, I think you are much better off already being married. As you point out, the legally valid ceremonies are very restricted in several ways. A legally valid marriage ceremony can only be performed in licensed premises and this must include a ‘permanent structure’, which essentially means a building of some sort, so wedding ceremonies outdoors on a beach or a meadow are not possible. Secondly, the language required is very strict, there are certain phrases and declarations which have to be included and cannot be changed. Thirdly, you would not be able to have a legally binding religious ceremony outside of the church.

But because you don’t need your ceremony to be legally binding you actually have a lot more flexibility! If I were you, I would try to talk to the local vicar and explain your situation, maybe they’ll be willing to do a blessing outside of the church. If that doesn’t work you’ll have to try and find an officiant or family member/friend to perform the ceremony for you. It may take a bit of searching but I’m sure you’ll find a good solution!

Let us know how you get on, and if you have any other questions about traditions or expectations! The English/Welsh/Scottish can be tricky to figure out some times 🙂

 

Post # 6
Member
167 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

That location is breathtaking!!

I’m a Texas girl marrying a brit also, I wanted SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO badly to marry in England, I feel your pain, the laws and rules made it nearly impossible, so he’s coming here, we are marrying in Vegas and we’ll have a reception/party in England. His uncle is a vicar so he will do a blessing for us as well so it should work out nicely.

 

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