(Closed) Thank you card etiquette help

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1014 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

how did you respond today?  if i was in your situation, i would have probably told her i hadn’t sent out all the thank you cards yet, and hers would be arriving sometime soon.

it totally sucks she missed your ceremony, but what can  you do?  be rude to her or end the friendhsip are options, i guess.  for me, it just wouldn’t be worth it to confront her or be mean by telling her she didn’t deserve a thank you card.  she knows what she did, and hopefully feels bad about it. 

Post # 4
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

That’s pretty rude of her, and weird that she’d expect a thank you. I agree with the pp though, it’s just not worth it. Tell her that you’re still working on thank you’s, and send her one.

Post # 5
3572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Honestly, it was rude of you to only thank guests who gave you gifts. Even if they were late, they cared enough to take time out of their day, their weekend, whatever and come support your marriage. You should have sent thank yous to every person who came, regardless if they brought you a gift. Also gifts are not even required at weddings. 

Did she get you a shower gift? 

I’m sorry if this sounds harsh, but if you want to know what to say to your friend, I would suggest, “I’m sorry, I may have made a mistake. My bad, and I do really appreciate your friendship and your support on my wedding day” and then send her a note.


Post # 6
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

If someone didn’t bring a gift to my wedding, they didn’t get a thank you card. I mean, heck they had free appetizers, dinner and unlimited drinks so i surely did’t need to send them a thank you card for eating the food i paid for. I did, however, send a few thank you cards to people who didn’t bring gifts but helped out. Like my sister in laws best friends was in charge of sending the bridesmaids and kids down the aisle.  She was also the only one there for me when i came out and started crying, so her support meant alot to me so i thanked her for that.

Post # 8
1126 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I was planning on sending cards to everyone that comes, regardless of whether they bring a gift.  Almost all my guests have to travel and stay in hotels for my wedding, so while most of them will probably bring gifts, I’m not going to be angry if they don’t.  As for your friend – I hate to ask, but do you think she gave you a gift that you didn’t receive?  Either a present or a card that somehow went missing or got lost in the mail?  I just think it’s weird that she’d ask about her thank you card if she didn’t bring anything.

Post # 9
10571 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

I agree with Miss OBG, presents can get lost.  Did you have favours at your wedding?  From what I’ve heard those are enough of a thank you for people who attended (although it doesn’t hurt to send a Thank You card).


It’s also not that long after your wedding, if you want to send her one even if she didn’t give a gift, you still have time!

Post # 11
2 posts
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’m suprised she asked for a thank you…thank you for what?

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