(Closed) thank you cards – timeframe

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Is 2 months long enough to expect a thank you card?
    Yes, she's being rude : (14 votes)
    33 %
    No, you're being impatient : (27 votes)
    63 %
    Obligatory other : (2 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    4439 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

    Speaking as someone who couldn’t sleep the night after my 2 showers until I did my thank you cards and then sent them out ASAP – YES.  She should have sent a thank you card by now.  One for the shower and one for the wedding.

    Post # 4
    Member
    10453 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    It wouldn’t bother me personally. She likely had a billion other things to do between the shower and wedding and I’m assuming a honeymoon since then. And maybe they’re waiting for pro pics to get cards made up. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    1902 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Yeah, some people want to use photos from the wedding as thank-you cards. Also, strictly speaking, I think anything up to a year from the wedding is the ‘allowable’ time for thank-you cards to be sent out (at least, I read that somewhere). Two months is a bit of a pain, but I’m sure your gifts were appreciated nonetheless!

    Post # 6
    Member
    7312 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    2 months is nothing. Ettiquett rules say that anything up to 12 months after the wedding is still within the realm of acceptability.

    Post # 7
    Member
    1297 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Hah, I just did a thread about this. I was curious how long it took other people to send out their cards… we got them out 5 months after the wedding. Undecided 

    Post # 8
    Member
    5784 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I don’t buy the 12 months nonsense, they don’t take THAT long to write. Maybe she wants to do combined Xmas/Thank You cards? I’d wait 3-4 months before getting annoyed.

    Post # 9
    Member
    2999 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Fiance and I waited 3 months for a Thank You card for a wedding. I didn’t care that they were waiting for pics to be delivered (which turned out to be a postcard), its still came off rude. I had started asking where they were at 1 month.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1927 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I go against what Emily Post says. It takes less than 10 minutes to write a think you card, so I really start expecting them within the month. My bridal shower thank you cards were in the mail 2 days after my bridal shower, most of my thank you cards for the wedding were in the mail 4 days after the wedding, some were 2 weeks later because my husband was being lazy. Hahaha. But I do admit that I am an over acheiver. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    777 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    I sent mine at about the 3 month mark since we were waiting on pro pics to include on the thank you cards. I wouldn’t get annoyed just yet.

    Post # 12
    Member
    2968 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    i think they should be sent out within 3-4 months of the wedding, but i also think it’s never too late to say thank you, so if it takes a year to send them out, then better than never.

    i would have had my cards sent out a month ago if i’d had my pictures, but i just received them yesterday, so i’m definitely going to get them done soon.

    i think you also need to consider what kind of post-wedding madness they had going on. traveling (destination wedding, honeymoon), moving, etc. those things can delay thank you cards.

    Post # 13
    Member
    546 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I had a similar situation but it was October 2011. I am still annoyed by it. I know they say 12 months but I think 3 is a better time frame. I am also they type that cant sleep until they are done.

    Post # 14
    Member
    1583 posts
    Bumble bee

    I am an avid thank you note writer and I have heard that 3-6 months is respectable. They are building a life and making a home so it may take a bit longer to get them all out. Calm down!

    Post # 15
    Member
    9209 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    @vorpalette:  Not everyone is super on the ball about these kinds of things.  I just got a thank you last week from my friend who got married in July, and I haven’t yet received a card from friends who got married in August.  Whatevs.  I think a year is way too late, but up to 6 months isn’t rude in my book.

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