(Closed) thank you notes

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: How should thank you notes for the couple's shower 2 weeks before the wedding be handled?
    Separate thank yous for the shower gifts and the wedding gifts : (16 votes)
    62 %
    Thank yous for the shower gifts can be on the same card as thank yous for the wedding gifts : (9 votes)
    35 %
    Separate thank you cards, but they can be mailed together in the same envelope : (1 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1391 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I would think someone was silly if I got two seperate thank you cards in one envelope lol. I would just mention the shower gift and the wedding gift in one card especially since your shower and wedding were so close together.

    Post # 4
    Member
    5921 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2010

    If it were me, I would just write one thank you.  We had two showers, one in October and one in November, so I had time to write all of them before the wedding.  If my situation were like yours, I would have just done one.

    Post # 5
    Member
    4137 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    always one thank you per gift. otherwise you’ll appear lazy. 

    eta: people easily could have given you just one gift that said “happy shower and wedding!” but they didn’t. they bought you 2 separate gifts. why wouldn’t you do the same for the thank yous?

    Post # 6
    Member
    9056 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I think people would understand getting just one thank you card that mentioned both gifts since they were so close together. 

    I definitely wouldn’t do two cards in one envelope.  That’s just really odd to me.

    Post # 7
    Member
    1872 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    I don’t know what the exact traditional etiquette on this, but I can say that if I was the giver, I would be fine with having both gifts mentioned in the same thank-you note, just so long as there hasn’t been an obscenely long time since either gift was given (I’d like to know that the gift was received). I’d also be fine with two thank-yous, but in all honestly, if we’re talking about receiving one thank-you note next week and then a second one the week after, I’d smile, but kind of wonder why the bride just didn’t do two in one shot!

    Either way, doing two cards in the same envelope seems unnecessary to me.

    Post # 8
    Member
    505 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2012

    I’m a not an etiquette person at all. I wouldn’t be upset if I received one card with a mention of both gifts in the card.  I think because the shower is so close to wedding date people are not going to care.  

    Besides…2011…times change

    Post # 9
    Member
    536 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    If the shower was 2 weeks before the wedding than I would just write 1 Thank you Card for both.
    If the shower had been a few months before than I would have done 2 separate thank yous.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1920 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Tough call but I tend to agree with Kitzy. People could  have just given you one gift because they were close together but they didn’t therefore they deserve two cards as well. I would get your shower thank yous sent out asap and your wedding ones can wait a bit especially if you are including pics or anything.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1757 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    Etiquette says that you should write two totally separate notes. However, if I were one of the gift givers, I’d be completely okay with just getting one note. (I voted for the “one note” option.)

    Post # 13
    Member
    1126 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I would just do one note, but specifically mention the shower as well.  Like, “thanks for coming for our wedding and the beautiful blah-blah, which we love and will think of you blah blah blah.  Also, it was so wonderful to celebrate with you at the shower last month, and the lovely blank was such a generous gift, which we will always cherish, etc.” 

    Personally, I would be fine with that, though I’d get on sending those thank you notes first, before you get to all the ones of guests who only attended the wedding.

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