Thank You Notes to be sent on 1st Anniversary – Wording/Etiquette help?

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
1987 posts
Buzzing bee

aioa: In this case, I would go with profuse expressions of gratitude, and sincere, personalized professions on the meaning of their friendship, how lovely it was to see them at the wedding, how their gift helped you guys get started together, etc. etc..  I would not attempt to draw attention to the fact that you guys are so late with these notes by pointing out that your first anniversary is coming up, as that will surely annoy some of your guests.  (Make sure to have your spouse help you so that the work gets done more quickly!)

Post # 3
Member
4508 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I would write them asap and don’t overthink it (so as to avoid even further delay!). Please don’t give any excuse for your lateness in your notes — EVERYONE is busy, and there is really no excuse for being so late. 

Just tell people how much it meant to you to have them there at the wedding and how generous it was of them to give you the gift they gave.

Post # 4
Member
2090 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I personally would absolutely apologize for being so late getting the thank yous out. Your guests know when you got married, they aren’t going to forget that your wedding was a year ago. A late thank you is surely better than no thank you at all, but I think the last you can do is acknowledge it. And sorry, I don’t think sending the out around your first anniversary makes it cute. Be grateful and apologetic, and leave the cuteness at the door.

Post # 5
Member
9113 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

People don’t want “cute and nostalgic” thank-yous. They want thank-yous. I wouldn’t draw attention to the fact that they’re late, because trust me — Every single person is blatantly aware of it. Express gratitude for their generous gifts, apologize and leave it at that.

Post # 6
Member
160 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I differ in my opinion from the prior responses.  If someone was a year late in sending me a thank you, I would definitely want them to acknowledge the fact that it was so late.  Otherwise, I would think they thought it was perfectly fine to be so delayed.

Post # 7
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee

Well I really differ in opinion and I am sure I will get flack for this..but if it was a year out.. I wouldn’t be interested in your apology or your thank you card.  If you couldn’t take the time to write me a thank you note before a year…..then the note you are writing now…I wouldn’t take the time to read.  Sorry 🙁

Post # 8
Member
4508 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

katinlc:  I’m not saying don’t apologize; I’m saying don’t give excuses. The master’s thesis excuse should never be uttered to anyone! 

Post # 9
Member
2734 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Yeahhh… there really is no excuse for an entire YEAR to go by. Everyone is busy. EVERYONE. And these people took time out of their busy and hectic schedules to attend your wedding. You could’ve taken the time out of your busy schedule to thank them for that.

I don’t think there is really any good way to go about this. Some people may not care, some will care greatly. Just write out what feels right to you and let it go. You’re gonna piss someone off no matter what. You make an excuse/apologize someone will find it condescending and offensive. You don’t mention it at all someone will find it rude that you just acted like your lateness wasnt an issue. There’s no win.

Post # 10
Member
1459 posts
Bumble bee

If you were family or my friend, I would understand that your school situation kept you from writing thank you cards till now.  A heartfelt apology and thank you for attending your wedding would be enough for me.  Life happens and sometimes we can’t always do things perfectly.

Post # 11
Member
929 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

A year late??? I would apologize PROFUSELY. Do NOT try to make it cute. It’s not cute. It’s selfish, thoughtless, and ungrateful. Everyone is busy. You are not a special kind of busy. Write sincere and very personal notes and hope you don’t offend anyone more than they’re already offended by your rudeness. 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 4 months ago by  Mrs. Honeybee.
Post # 12
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I guess you could say something like, “Whew! We made it through an entire year of marriage, and don’t have to return the gifts! Therefore we’d like to thank you for being part of our big day…. blah, blah, blah.” I feel like humor can go a long way in difusing and awkward situation. 

Post # 13
Member
9546 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

aioa:  Don’t beat yourself up too bad. Better late than never and all of that. I would just keep the apology short, don’t offer any excuses, and thank them for being there. Something like:

“Our deepest apologies at the tardiness of this note, but I wanted to thank you for your gift and, more importantly, for coming to our wedding and celebrating our marriage with us. It was so special to have you there, especially after you’ve been so suportive of me over the years. You really tore it up on the dance floor, and I hope you had fun. We’re so happy to be married and can’t wait to see you at Easter!”

Post # 14
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee

Oh my goodness, why do people get so precious about things?

Yes, it’s a year after your wedding, but it’s better late than never, right? I assume you invited the people closest to you, so the majority of your guests would have been aware you were mid-thesis and should give you a little grace for your lateness.

Acknowledge it, apologise, thank them for their generosity and let them know it helped you greatly in one of the busiest times of your life!

 

Post # 15
Member
742 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

Omg get a grip, she didn’t get time to do it, she’s doing it now. Why do people get so up in a heap over silly things. 

OP just send the thank you’s now. Apologise for being late and move on with your life. Better late than never!!

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