(Closed) Thank Yous Debacle

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
80 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

My friend (who was under the advisement of an expert wedding planner) wrote the thank-yous right after the shower. Actually, the host of the shower passed around a basket of envelopes and had each of us address ours so that all she had to to was write the notes!

My advice: get on those thank-yous pronto. I actually wrote a post the other day recounting my thank-you note fiasco from our engagement party and…well…just trust me, it’s better to write them now.



Post # 4
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Just think of it this way:  No one ever got upset by being thanked too many times!  I’d play it safe.

Post # 5
1091 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018 - Oakland Manor

I believe you send thank you notes for the gifts received at the bridal shower, and send thank you notes again for the gift received after the wedding. I agree wiht HistoryBride, its best to play it safe.

Post # 7
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2018 - The Desmond Hotel in Malvern, PA

Yes yes, definitely write Thank You notes for shower gifts now!  Your fiance might be confused with the "rule" that you’re supposed to wait to USE shower gifts until after the wedding…. but you need to thank people for them right away ๐Ÿ™‚  (Although we cheated and used some of our gifts before our wedding!  We knew there was no chance the wedding wasn’t going to happen ๐Ÿ™‚ 

Post # 9
2292 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

As long as you’re pretty sure the wedding is happening, I don’t think it hurts to use the shower gifts before the wedding.  The one hard and fast rule that we had was: We didn’t use anything before we had sent the thank you note!  That made us get them written faster than we might have otherwise.  (Actually a couple of weeks before the wedding I made a new rule that we couldn’t OPEN any more presents until we caught up on the thank you notes – that worked beautifully.)

Post # 10
699 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I am so glad I read this post! I had no idea you weren’t supposed to use the gifts till after the wedding. It makes sense though I don’t know if we will do that! ๐Ÿ™‚

I like Suzanno’s idea!

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