(Closed) thank-you’s to people who gave nothing?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1986 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Yes, you send them a thank you card for them attending

Post # 4
Member
7311 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

Take the high road and thank them for attending.

Post # 5
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

“Thank you so much for attending our wedding” is the nice thing to say.

Post # 6
Member
1048 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I didn’t send a thank you to anyone that didn’t give a gift (there were only a few).  

Post # 7
Member
1252 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Its not necessary to send a thank you card for attending your wedding, and it could potentially come across as though you are fishing for a gift.

ETA:  Our wedding favors included a tag that thanked people for sharing our day with us, and we thanked people in person at the wedding.

Post # 8
Member
526 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Definitely thank them for attending.  Maybe it’ll make them feel guilty. 

Post # 9
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

 We are still sending them a “thank you for celebrating our special day with us” type card to the people who came giftless and or cardless.

Post # 10
Member
1061 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

We had a few folks (mostly friends of DH’s who came alone, don’t make much money and traveled to be there) who didn’t give gifts, which I understand.  We plan to send them our photo card with a “thank you for attending”.

Post # 12
Member
883 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Definitely thank them! In our culture, we don’t send out thank you cards. LOL so it was so new to me to see the Traditional American way, per say.

Post # 13
Member
726 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

“Thank you for living up to our expectations and being aloof the entire wedding. We hope you enjoyed the food!” Of course don’t listen to me. That’s just what you should write if you feel like starting a war. Oh, the things I think up when I should be napping…

Post # 14
Member
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I sent thank you cards to everyone who attended.  It wouldn’t have been a party if people did not show up.  It truly meant a great deal to me to have family and friends I love there to celebrate with me.  They took time from their day to enjoy it with me and that matters.

Gift or not, I was thrilled for each and every person to be there and I want them to know that.

Post # 15
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

We had two people who didn’t give us gifts at our wedding (neighbor and my husband’s boss) so I simply told them thanks for spending our special day with us. My Darling Husband and I found it odd that they hadn’t given us a gift, but we were still thankful that they came to our wedding!  Within two weeks, we had gift cards/money from both of them. They said they had just forgot.

It is my opinion that you should always thank somebody for attending, whether they gave a gift or not.

Post # 16
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

You might feel bad if you don’t send a card (or worse, say something rude! Not that you would do that, but some would…), and then a gift shows up the next day or something. Things happen, gifts get left in the car, things go out in the mail late. You never know!

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