Post # 1
My husband and I tend to be a little… frugal. Our parents paid a portion of the wedding and we’re both pretty good savers, so the cost of our wedding and honeymoon were completely pre-paid before I even set foot down the aisle.
I’m just starting to sit down and write thank you cards, and a lot of our guests gave us very generous cash gifts. Etiquette books suggest you write how you’re planning to use a gift to personalize the note. Honestly, our only intention with the gift money is to put it in our savings account, and let it sit there, but that sounds so boring! I’m leaning toward saying it went toward the honeymoon…
It’s pure semantics at this point, but if you give a cash gift at a wedding would you prefer to hear that the couple spent it to offset wedding costs, spent it on their honeymoon or put it in savings, or something else??
Post # 3
I voted savings because I am frugal too.
I would just be truthful. That is what people vaulue the most. If you are going to put it in saving, maybe you can mention something that you are saving for, if you want to elaborate.
Post # 4
Are you saving for anything in particular? If I got a card saying “thanks we put it in the bank” I’d probably be a bit disappointed, because I’m not frugal at all! I would have given you cash so that you could spend it on something you actually wanted, not so it could sit in the bank 🙂 If your savings are for something like travel or a house, I think that would be worth mentioning. Otherwise you could just say we haven’t decided how to spend it yet but we really appreciate it.
Post # 5
It’s a running joke in our families that we store it in our mattress/floorboards etc, and my mother still gives me a hard time about suggesting an engagement RRSP (Canadian retirement savings fund) contribution.
Houses in our area are about $600,000 and closing in on a million plus if we wanted to get within a 30 minute commute to work, so we have a condo and are saving up for a down payment, but that’s a pretty long term goal at this point.
Post # 6
I would be fine with hearing anything other than “offsetting wedding costs.” I can’t quite put my finger on it, but it doesn’t appeal to me.
Perhaps you could say “your generous gift helped us start our married life on the right foot” or something vague like that.
Post # 7
@spinach: I agree. Totally not my favourite option either. We had a couple guests who specifically told us in advance that they were buying our cake as a gift, or wanted me to put their gift toward getting my dream dress (and will thank them accordingly), so I was curious if it would be a popular choice in general.
Post # 8
I know my family members would be happy to hear I put money into a savings account (something I never do!)
I would just dress it up a little say you are saving it for a rainy day or something like that.
Post # 9
- Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School
I said we were putting into the “House Saving” fund, which is not really true but does sound better than just saving it for a rainy day!
Post # 10
Ditto on the saving for a house–even if its really long term, it still sounds better than just saving the money.
We said something like “thanks for your generous gift. we’re really excited to start working on our house together.” For a few people we listed a specific project, but mostly just said something about working on our house in general.
Post # 11
Honeymoon. Things on the registry I really want and will use a lot but wouldn’t spend money on otherwise. Toward the down payment on a house. I feel that people are contributing the start of our marriage – I want them to know I respect that. I think the house is the only way you can get away with putting the money in savings.
Post # 12
I have never once received a thank you card specifying what they plan on doing with my gift (and we always give cash). I think it would be rather odd to hear it anyway,and would really just prefer ‘Thank you for coming to our wedding and for your generous gift.’ Keep it simple.
Post # 13
We used a lot of our wedding money to keep us afloat these past couple months while I don’t have a job. The rest is in savings. But I didn’t like how that sounded, so I say the same thing for every cash gift: “We are using it towards furnishing our home.”
Post # 14
Honestly, I always give a cash gift for weddings and I do not care one way or another what they use it on… and i dont even feel its necessary to explain what you used it for… A simple thank you that we gave them a gift is enough for me…
Post # 15
I would not care what the couple spent it on. Who am I to say what they should/should not be spending their money on? Once I give it, it’s out of my hands and out of my mind. I know that when we get cash for the wedding, there isn’t one particular thing that it will go toward. I’ll have to figure out how to word that in the thank you card–I might just say, “Thank you for your generous gift.”
Post # 16
I think I would say that it was for savings for a home downpayment (even if it’s not in the near future).
We said that we were using ours for a honeymoon/furnishing our new place after moving but we didn’t really do either. Oh well!