(Closed) "Thanks for letting me go do ______"

posted 5 years ago in Married Life
Post # 76
Member
3208 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

urchin:  My Fiance and I share a google calendar that we input our lives into (seriously! We’re both really forgetful otherwise!) so needing to clarify plans with each other is quite rare. 

Also, I have a more demanding job, whereas FI’s hours are really stable. It’s not rare that I send the 7pm text saying I’ll be at work all evening, and show up at home at 11pm to find him out somewhere. If I’m having a particularly shitty day, I will text him on my way home to give him a heads up, and he usually meets me on the way or comes home so I can vent before bed.

I think it has less to do with permission and more to do with thoughtfulness and civility. Seriously, some of my guy friends are total dolts. There have been numerous times that they’ve crashed on our couch blackout drunk, only to wake up the next day to find their girlfriend/wife freaking out about whether they’re dead. If you can’t send a text out of courtesy letting your SO know what you’ll be up to, that will lead to needing to ask permission later on, and rightfully so. My Fiance tends to roll his eyes at his buddies’ girlfriends being controlling tyrants, but if either of us went missing for a night, I’m sure our relationship dynamics would change too.

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