Post # 1
Today at work when I went on my break one of the ladies in my office asked me if there was a “bun if the oven yet,” and everyone at work knows I just got married so of course the question comes up a lot as to when I’m going to have kids. I replied and told her “no not yet, we just moved into an apartment and we just want to enjoy being married.” Then she asks well what if you did have a bun in the oven? I said well then I’d keep it ( I don’t know what she was getting at). She then asks me how old I was (I’m 27) and made a big ol face and said oooh you don’t have much time you don’t want to have kids with down syndrome. Now of course I know that pregnancies after 30 can cause potential problems but I just found that rude of her to say. I’m kind of annoyed that it’s getting pointed out to me that my biological clock is ticking but me and Darling Husband are in no way TTC just yet. It sure puts pressure on us women though.
What do you ladies think? Anyone in the same boat and find it annoying? Just a little vent lol.
Post # 3
If it’s someone close to me I’ll say something like, “We’re not ruling it out completely but it’s not really a priority for us”. For just plain nosey people I tell them “It’s not ticking, it’s broke, or missing.”
Post # 4
@kryssbride: Seriously? I’d report her to HR. I’m not usually like that, but that would make my blood boil!
I’m 27 and no one has even hinted at me needing to have kids yet.
Realistically it’s 35+ when birth defects start.
Hell, my mom had my sister when she was 40.
Post # 5
Wow, first of all, I think that woman should be ashamed of herself for saying that to you, and especially trying to THREATEN you by mentioning Down Syndrome. One of my closest friends has a child with Down Syndrome (she was 25 when her little girl was born), and she is the light of their lives. So first off, ANYONE can have a child with DS, and additionally, I’d just not even worry about this lady–she sounds NUTS, and 27 is young! Just enjoy being married!
Post # 6
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
Um, 27 is not old at all to still be childfree.
Post # 7
@MrsTangerine: I like that reply lol i’ll use that one next time.
@Wed2Attn: Thanks! I plan to enjoy the married life and some people don’t get that ugh! lol
Post # 8
Where do you live? I find that it’s very regional where people feel ike 27 is “old” to be a mom.
The stats don’t start dramatically changing for Downs Syndrome until 35, by the way. Average age of first child in my peer group is well into the 30s. I’m about to turn 29, don’t have a kid, and not a single person bats their eyes at that!
Post # 9
She is tactless and has a reliable connection between mouth and foot. I’ve had coworkers like that and though it doesn’t always work, what I try to do is to limit conversations with them to the most generic, neutral topics… shopping, movies, hobbies, etc.
Post # 10
Your coworker sounds very uninformed. Ignore her.
Post # 11
Tell that things have changed a lot since she was young 😉
Post # 12
I forgot to put in the batteries.
Post # 13
Bleh. I’ll be 28 shortly after we get married, but we won’t be TTCing for at least a year after that. We’d like to enjoy being married and be in a house, plus Fiance will be going into his program right after we get married, and I’d rather not have a baby on just my income.
Post # 14
If it makes you feel better, when I was 22 I taught at a different school than I do now. It was very inner city and a lot of the mothers were VERY young. I had a parent teacher meeting one time where a mom asked me why I didn’t have kids. When I replied that I had recently graduated from college and still had plenty of time for that (not that I owed her an explanation), she said to me “well, you better do it soon because you don’t want to be old!
I’m pregnant now and thrilled about it…because I’m actually ready!
(And FWIW, everyone is “ready” at different times…I have a friend who is younger than me that has FOUR!)
Post # 15
That is just rude! I get that “when are you having kids” all the time and I HATE it! Yes I know I am 29 and have been told by many I don’t want to be 30 and have kids, or we are getting too old…DH’s mom made a comment before we were married when he would give her a grandkid…um she has 20 already!! I slso have friends who cannot have kids and people asking those questions and not knowing the circumstances is just rude and irritates me. I also have friends older than me who do not have kids yet and do want to have them.