Post # 1
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
As I was discussing my ideas with my mom today about what I envisioned for my wedding (an outdoor ceremony, BBQ style food at the reception, some fun yard games during the cocktail hour perhaps…horseshoes anyone?). All she kept saying was “you can’t do that.”
Oh, sorry mom. I didn’t realize this was YOUR wedding. Oh wait. Its not.
She tried to explain to me that you can’t invite people to a wedding and serve them chicken and pulled pork (I think she had a catering hall, chicken beef or fish type of wedding in mind for me). Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Traditional formal weddings can be beautiful. But its just not my style.
My parents are paying for a large part of the wedding, but they offered without me asking. And Fiance and myself will gladly pay for the wedding if they don’t like my ideas. But I was getting so frustrated with her telling me that I “can’t” do what I want. (She has also gone off and made appointments to see venues that SHE likes for us to visit…Momzilla in the making?)
(Side note: Future Mother-In-Law has also made similar comments about serving this type of food)
I say its MY wedding. If you don’t want to eat the food I’m going to serve you, then don’t come. Anyone else having these issues with their parents/future in laws? Or am I the only one?
Post # 3
Member
142 posts
Blushing bee
try sarcasm, Ok mum it was either that or I want to get married abroad I want 500 guests and a three course luxury meal in a 7* hotel so your gonna have to pay all the flights and hotel and food that ok? or do you think we should stick to the original plan?
Post # 4
Member
1014 posts
Bumble bee
Maybe you can find a happy medium. Outdoor location, but more rustic chic than backyard BBQ? Show her some blog ideas so she can see it can be laidback, while still elegant and beautiful. We had lawn games, outdoor venue, and a relaxed vibe, but it was still very nice and none of our guests complained!
Post # 5
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
I’m in an extremely similar situation. My mom actually told me she would rather bring a brown bag lunch for herself if I did that type of reception, even after I explained to her several times that I can’t afford even a “normal” catered affair for everyone (I’m funding the entire wedding – she’s not putting a dime into it). I’ve been so stressed that I’m hardly sleeping at night and started losing handfuls of hair… I had to go to the doctor to make sure this was stress and not something else going on. When she found out about that, my mom backed off quite a bit. In fact, she now denies ever saying the brown bag lunch comment!! She’s so damn infuriating!!
P.S. She also negates any type of entertainment we like… photobooth, caricatures, magician, etc, so just know that you aren’t alone in this “mom hell.”
Post # 6
Member
34 posts
Newbee
My mom does the same thing!! it is so irritating..We are doing a very informal bbq reception too, and she actually said to me “we have some very classy people coming & we just cannot serve them bbq.” I quickly told her that this was my wedding and we will be serving whatever my fiance & I decide to serve. My mother hasn’t put a lot of money into the wedding, which is fine since we have not asked her to, but for her to tell me what we will or will not serve, isn’t acceptable.
I say, have whatever food you want! it is YOUR wedding & you should be able to have the kind of wedding that you want!
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