(Closed) “that isn’t a real diamond” vent

posted 9 years ago in Rings
Post # 32
43 posts
  • Wedding: August 2002




Post # 33
802 posts
Busy bee

Um, yes. I had a friend who congratulated me and asked to see the ring. Then she rudely asked why he didn’t get me a diamond? My center stone is actually lab-color-treated blue diamond.

I understood when friends commented on what a lovely aquamarine it was and how beautiful the ring was. I was really pissed off at this friend though because, so what if it really wasn’t a diamond? Hello, Fiance is still finishing his undergrad, and has no money. He worked all summer to buy me a ring, and I just wanted a simple band because I wanted him to save the money for our future. He was so sweet and nice and really wanted to buy me a nice ring that he could afford. It was the thought that counts. He could have bought me a simple band, or just paid to have my grandmother’s ring reset, but he wanted to buy the ring, and he wanted to get down on one knee with a ring that he had picked out. Even now when I look at the ring, sometimes I feel really horrible and guilty because he did spend most of his money. And that money could have gone towards saving for med school, or the wedding, or for an apartment together. 

Why would it have made a difference if it was really an aquamarine? She said it like, what was wrong with him that he didn’t get me a diamond? Like, did he think I wasn’t worth a diamond? She made it out like he was an asshole for not buying me a diamond. When I responded that it was a diamond, then it was like it was all better! What if I had wanted an aquamarine, or an emerald, or a citrine? 

Post # 34
79 posts
Worker bee

I just went ring shopping in “real stores” instead of online shopping, and while me and my bff were there, we were shocked! and frankly a lot paranoid! because they had a “dealer” (idk what u call them, but the sales associates from companies that brin sample rings around to jewelry stores so they can order ones to carry in store), and all these samples were EVERYWHERE in the e-ring area! we were paranoid because there have been alot of thefts in our area lately and we were paranoid that if something went missing they would think its us.  Newho, while i was trying rings on, we mentioned how nervous that made us and what if someone had tried to steal one.  To our suprise, the lady told us (we asked at 3 stores to confirm and we got the same awnser from everyone), that in most actual jewlery stores, such as helzberg, zales, riddles, ect. all the “diamonds” in the displays, are actually CZs, the same with the ones the dealers travel with, that way if they are stolen, they are just out the cost of the setting, and the cost of the CZ which is alot less than the diamond price.  so techincally when u try on any ring pretty much it isnt a “real diamond”, this conversation started in the second jewelry store we went to, when i found a ring i loved and the sales lady stated, just look at how it shines now, just imagine how much more it will shine with a real diamond in it.  To be perfectly honest, even their large carat CZs are of such high quality that we had NO clue they were not actual diamonds in the settings if they would not have told us.  that is why so many jewelery stores, have in house jewlers, so when you buy the ring, while they get it ready to go, apparently they just swap out the stones, and send you with the real diamond.  So that was kind of rude, idk about JCpenny rings…but i was suprised to find this out at some very high end retailers in our area, and it makes since, esp for the people who bring the samples in, i would be so afraid of getting robbed!!

edit: note that the sales lady in the second store, was a good friend of my BFF, that has worked in the same jewelry store for probably 5-6 years, and is very open and honest with me about buying a diamond.

Post # 35
666 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I think she wanted you to ask her to show you a real diamond ring.  She could make more sales that way.

Post # 36
3225 posts
Sugar bee

@Wanderlusty:  Wow that is SO unprofessional. I would have probably told her so too because that would have upset me. Just so you know every time I’ve been interested in shopping for a wedding band with gemstones in it every sales associate manages to talk me out of it. It’s like people don’t want you to buy anything other than diamonds. It’s annoying actually. Get what YOU like!

Post # 37
4634 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

what a fucking bitch. complain!

Post # 38
705 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

This is why I tend to avoid chain stores in general and definitely for expensive items like jewelry.  When my fiance and I were shopping, the jeweler who ended up making my ring tried to talk me down from moissanite to CZ.  He was showing me the cool things that they do with heat to make it a bit more yellow and diamond looking and that if I am going with a simulant, I may as well save some cash.  

Fiance was thankfully not there and I asked him not to say that in front of him, explained how much convincing I’d had to do to get him off of the only diamonds ever thing and that I don’t consider a moissanite a simulant.  We had a really good talk about it and he has been talking about carrying a few loose stones in his store on my advice–I told him how a lot of people hear about it but are afraid to get it because they can’t see it and how many people just take their business to the internet.  The only reason I did not was because I am a picky bitch.

He’s never once tried to upsell me on anything and it was really cool that he listened to what I had to say and took my advice.  A chain store couldn’t and wouldn’t do that.

Post # 39
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I went into a jewelry store and when I told the sales people I was looking for white topaz in silver (it has special meaning and is really what I want) they looked at me like I had grown a second head and said “If you can’t afford a diamond why don’t you get a cubic zirconia and upgrade to a diamond later? Lots of people do it.” Um…because I want white topaz, why is it that if you ask for anything other than a diamond it’s because you can’t afford one? What if I DON’T want a diamond?

Post # 40
116 posts
Blushing bee

I agree with zomgwut. I first started looking for rings jewelry stores in the mall. HUGE MISTAKE. All the salespeople were either not knowledgeable, rude, or both. No offense to any bees who work in one, that’s just been my experience. 

Don’t be discouraged. I would suggest going to an independent jeweler/jewelry store.  

Post # 41
776 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

It’s sad that such a person can ruin a time that is supposed to be happy and exciting.  (Hopefully she didn’t really ruin anything for you, except your opinion of her)  I don’t even know why everyone thinks that if it’s not a diamond it’s not good anyways.  I’m sure it was a sales ploy from way back to make everyone want something more expensive. 

I’ve seen so many rings of different stone types that I think are even more beautiful than diamonds anyways.  You get what YOU want.  What makes YOU feel good.  Not what some snot nosed salesperson dictates that you should have. 


I’d definitely complain.

Post # 42
2116 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Wow, I’m so sorry you were treated that way. I find this ridiculous because who cares about diamonds? They aren’t even rare and they are not worth the price that they cost. It is such a rip off and the diamond industry has manipulated men and women in our country to believe that a big diamond equals love. That is so stupid. 

Post # 43
58 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

I had a bad experence with my love at a JC penny we are on a budget and online I found a ring in our price ringe that looked sooo pretty and said it was a great clearity of dimound I had a feeling that I should see it in person soo me and my love had to drive about 30 mins to get to the store then when I was looking at it in person it looked like forsted glass and the sales woman kept seeing oo it’s the best clearity when I told her we won’t going to buy it that day she gave me a bad look like I did something worng I didn’t expect the best clearity as we can’t get a thousand somthing ring but it looked so fake and she talked like I couldn’t see the bad clearty in my hand

Post # 44
12242 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I’m amazed how many offended people there are! I worked in retail for a LONG time before teaching, and there is just no depth to customer stupidity or misplaced rage. I am sure that poor lady has been screamed at a hundred times for “selling a fake diamond”.

When I bought a pair of feaux-leather boots from JCP, my shoe lady told me they weren’t really leather three times! Those poor people get yelled at so often that they err on the side of caution.


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