Post # 1
Just a little PSA-
I normally HATE ‘self-help’ type books, but our officiant (my childhood religious leader) asked us to read “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. I just want to recommend this book to absolutely EVERYONE- engaged, waiting, married, etc. The main idea (in case the title didn’t give it away) is that there are 5 ‘languages’ that people ‘speak’ to interpret emotional love (words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, physical touch,and giving gifts). There’s a quiz at the end of the book (or you can take it here) to determine what your ‘love language’ is.
Fiance and I never had any trouble making each other feel loved, but this is really a great way to think about why your SO might feel the way he/she is feeling towards you at a given time, why you might feel the way you do towards your SO, and how to make each other feel more loved. It also gives suggestions that correlate to each language- for example, if your SO is a ‘words of affirmation’ person and you’re not, it gives you ideas for how to make your SO feel appreciated in a ‘love language’ you don’t speak.
Even if you think you have the perfect relationship, this book is a really really good way to reconsider the way couples interact and how they can improve their connection. Just wanted to put that out there.
Did anyone else read it?
Post # 3
I love love love that book!!! I have applied it to other relationships as well such as with friends and parents. It’s pretty easy to figure out someone’s love language.
I think DH and I must have clicked early on because we have the same love language, but different secondary languages.
Post # 4
Us too! We’re both ‘quality time’ people, but then he’s ‘physical touch’ and I’m ‘acts of service’ after that.
You’re right- it’s definitely worth applying to other relationships 🙂
Post # 5
I’ve been thinking about getting that book! Thanks for the review! Did it take long to read?
Post # 6
I just started reading this book. I haven’t gotten very far yet so I’ve not read about the specific love languages yet. The book came highly recommended. I’m looking forward to really diving into it and seeing what I can learn!
Post # 7
- Wedding: May 2012 - The Chapel of the Sir Christopher Wren Building, 2007 Legacy Hall
This sounds like a great read. Thanks for the recommendation! Amazon, here I come…
Post # 8
Agreed! Three snaps in a Z formation for that book! Loved it.
Post # 9
I’m reading it now. I really like the part about how everyone has a love-tank that needs to be filled. For me, I need technology-free quality time with DH. Often, we’re both very into our computers, him especially (video games) and even if we’re in the same room together, we don’t pay much attention to each other. I found myself getting resentful of his video games, so we made a rule that twice a week we turn everything off and just focus on each other.
Post # 10
I LOVE this book. I’m still trying to convince DH to read it..he’s not a reader.
Post # 11
This book should seriously be require reading. So spot on and it was a real eye-opener for me.
Post # 12
Hm, I don’t think the quiz was very accurate for me, since I have a feeling I take FI’s acts of service for granted because he’s more of the cook and cleaner than I am, lol. But I definitely want to read this book at some point, if I ever have time.
ETA: Also, I just went through the husband’s quiz because I was curious, and there are quite a few different questions from the wife’s quiz… but since I think Fiance and don’t fit the stereotypical gender roles in our relationship it really affects the results… anyone else notice this? Just curious.
Post # 13
It’s pretty short. I read it in 1 night 🙂
Post # 14
I’m working on reading it now. It has def made me think. I cant wait to finish it so I can make DH read it.
Post # 15
Fiance and I did a sunday school class for about 8 weeks with this as the lessons. The class was for “married” couples, but we did long before we were engaged. The quiz was pretty accurate and revealed Fiance and I’s biggest miscommunication issue…we have different love languages! As a PP said, I’m not usuall into these self-help type things, but this was highly recommended by several people so we did it and we are glad we did. The biggest thing we learned other than our love languages was the “love tank”…full or empty. On occasion, we still use that to express our feelings and what we need from the other person. I think this is a great book, and I’d do it a second time for sure!
Post # 16
I have read this book, as has Fiance, both long before we met each other. It should be a required read as should his other book the five languages of apology. The latter book helped me in every relationship.