(Closed) The 7 biggest fattest wedding complaints

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I love the mention of the cash smashing!  I hate that tradition!

Post # 4
5263 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

I loved this article! And that’s saying a lot, because I usually hate wedding opinion pieces. 

Post # 5
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think it’s interesting that they suggest providing cheap options for drinks with the option to purchase the top shelf items.  I’d say most wedding etiquette would say that’s incorrect.  Nice to see an article that might actually be somewhat with the times.

Post # 6
2767 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

eh I don’t know about this list.  Some of it just sounds like someone whining.  So you have a cash bar, big deal?  If someone can’t fork out $5 for their drink or can’t survive a night without alcohol and they complain about it then they probably don’t love you in the first place.  I had a cash bar.  But I also provided free beer and wine.  The cash bar was for the people who were too picky for the free beer and wine.  Was that wrong of me to have a cash bar?  I don’t think so.  I think it was considerate to allow a full liquor bar.  I could have just stopped it at the free beer and wine.  Then no one would have been able to have whiskey sours, rum and coke, or tequila shots.

I also don’t think the cake smashing is that bad of a thing.  It can be fun.  But I didn’t do it at my wedding because I didn’t want to make a mess and my husband wouldn’t have approved.

And the thing about having hordoevres or appetizers is a little ridiculous.  When I go to weddings I know that I’ll probably be waiting around a bit before the meals are served.  In fact, for my wedding I made sure that guests knew there would be a break before the dinner.  The ceremony was at 2.  The cocktail hour started at 4:30.  I clearly stated this in the invites and the programs.  If they couldn’t figure out that there would be a break in between the ceremony and food then that was their problem.  I think if everyone knew what caterers charged for those appetizers ($3 for a tiny fried mushroom, $4 for one single chocolate dipped strawberry, etc.) they would be fine with you not providing appetizers.  I know I would feel bad if someone paid $5 for me to eat a single bite appetizer.  What a waste of money in my opinion.

Post # 7
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

Overall I agreed…. especially about the ceremony gap (I get why people do it… but as a guest I hate it and I’m not having one at my wedding). The one that I didn’t think was fair was about the pig roast…. you hire a caterer and tell them how many people are attending. Thats basically all you can do, right? I would be mortified if we ran out of food but it wouldn’t be my fault… it is the caterer’s JOB to have enough food and you can’t really put that on the bride/groom. 

My friend told me about a wedding she went to where the buffet ran out of food as well… is this really a common problem? We’re having a stations buffet and this doesn’t seem like something I should have to worry about!

Post # 8
2208 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I thought this article was fine, but kind of only applies to really traditional weddings. It mentions the Destination Wedding, but it doesn’t acknowledge that people are doing so many different things than the standard ceremony + sit-down dinner + dancing approach. Which is fine, it is meant for a mass audience, but it was just a tad traditional for my tastes.

If I wrote it, I would break it down into basic categories:

– don’t make your guests take their wallets out for anything that is normally paid for

– keep your guests fed

– BUT don’t feed too much/too greasy

– cut the standing around time

– skip the insider/awkward/cutesy stuff that means something to only a couple people, and makes everyone else uncomfortable

Post # 9
1385 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Overall agreed as well. Mr. AZ found this a couple weeks ago and printed it off to ensure we are faux-pas-free. Lol!

Post # 10
888 posts
Busy bee

personally, i’m sick of pieces like this.  i’m a very picky person and i don’t ever even think of these things.  when i’m at a wedding, its to celebrate two people getting married.  if the food or some other thing isn’t to my liking well, actually i never think about it.

i want my guests to be well taken care of but me – i don’t think about these things so much.  people complain too much i think


Post # 11
1209 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I totally agree with you Wildstyle!

Post # 12
476 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I’ve followed this pretty well, but I am going to have a cash bar.  I have too many alcoholic (and still drinking) friends that would run my bank acount dry and too many alcoholic (and sober) family members that I want to discourage from drinking by not handing them free alcohol.  So, I’m sticking to this one.

Post # 13
5263 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

I don’t think it even has to be about pickiness. 

I mean, I don’t go to weddings expecting to eat. I’m a vegetarian, I get that that often means there won’t be food for me and I’m used to it. But from being on WB I’ve learned that there are plenty of people who never would have thought of a veggie option, and genuinely wanted to learn about how many people were vegetarian/what they could eat. I really appreciate those people, because they’re making an effort – but if no one ever talked about it, how would anyone know that it’d be nice to have?

I didn’t take the article as “weddings should all fit my standard” I took it as “these are things your guests will appreciate.” 

Post # 14
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Interesting how much of it applies to ONLY the food. Apparently all guests care about is what we feed them? And yet, what percentage of the effort/work you’re putting into this shebang is related to the food?

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