- 9 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
with me (the bride).
I am 99% sure that my fiance’s best friend (and best man in our wedding) is in love with me. He’s kind of hinted at it a few times over the years but last night he made some comments that made me absolutely sure.
I am not trying to flatter myself or anything. Trust me, until I met my fiance I NEVER had any men in pursuit of me AT ALL.
But from the minute I met my fiance’s best friend almost 5 years ago, I could tell he was attracted to me. And it’s become more and more obvious over the past few years, especially since we’ve been planning our wedding with him as best man.
Let me be clear: I would NEVER, EVER forsake my fiance for his best friend. I love him inside and out more than I could possibly ever say.
But I think the reason this bothers me so much is that I know how he feels. Meaning, for most of my life, I have been the girl that has watched her friends and relatives be swept off their feet by boys and men who I had feelings for. I can’t tell you how many times I had to watch girls I was close to fall in love with somebody I loved and didn’t love me back. This is quite possibly one of the worst emotions anyone can feel.
And I feel guilty as sin.
Most people would say “oh he will find his own love one day,” and I think he will, but he has had zero luck with women his entire life. Even though he is an attractive, sweet, smart, honest, hard-working guy, he has serious confidence issues and some deep-rooted emotional problems that stem from his family (bilological father abandoned him at birth, mom has some mental instabilities, border-line alcoholic step dad, autistic/ADHD teenage brother).
It just kills me to watch him go through this. As someone who has been depressed herself, I think that he is also depressed. And I feel like I’ve been where he is mentall/emotionally, and as much as I would like to help him out, I feel like that might be crossing the line in terms of our relationship.
I haven’t said anything to my fiance about my suspicisions/concerns because I have no idea how he’d react. And the three of us have such an awesome friendship that I don’t want to put that in jeopardy.
Am I worrying about this too much? Should I just keep my mouth shut and go about my business? Should I mention it to my fiance? Should I reach out to the best man on a one-to-one basis?
Thoughts would be appreciated, but please be nice. Like I said, I would never in a million years even consider cheating on my fiance physically or emotionally, especially with his best friend.
But I’m worried about the best friend and feel terrible for him.