(Closed) The Buzz: What length of time did you date before getting engaged, and…

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 77
Member
2609 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

We dated for 14 months before getting engaged. Fiance is 34 and I am 29, I think we both knew what we were looking for and knew that we had found it in each other. I told Fiance before getting engaged that I wanted about a year to plan a wedding. It seems like once I told him that he immediatly started looking for rings! I think his reaction was “well I’d like to be married to her by this time next year so I better get moving!”, by the time we get married we will have been together for 26 months.

Post # 78
Member
110 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Engaged at 6 months. Married at 9 months.

 

Every relationship is different. What works for one won’t work for the other.

Post # 79
Member
2362 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - B&B

Fiance and I dated for 2 years and 9 months or so before becoming engaged. I was honestly expecting to be together almost another year before being engaged, but Fiance knew that I wanted a long engagement. He knew he wanted to marry me, but he wasn’t on a strict timeline, per say, until he realized when he wanted to start trying to have kids. From there, he realized that he needed to get the ball rolling on an engagement, so we could have a long engagement and then a few years to ourselves as a married couple before we start trying!

We just recently celebrated our 4 year (together) anniversary on May 30th, and we’re getting married in two months!

Post # 80
Member
2587 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - UK

Man, we got engaged like 6 weeks before our 7-year anniversary, and two years before I thought we would! I thought we wouldn’t get engaged until my FH had finished his PhD, but instead we got engaged with two years to go. My thought had been that he wouldn’t have the time to plan whilst studying – his thought was that he’d be too busy applying for jobs to plan once he’d finished!

 

It has almost certainly worked out for the best though – odds are good that he is going to have to apply to all and sundry, and we may end up moving very far away, which would make wedding-planning difficult! And equally, if he ends up having to move abroad for work, being married would certainly help with regards to any visas we might need!

 

 

 

I would certainly say we weren’t ready to get engaged before we did though – the first three years of our relationship were during our undergraduate degrees, and the fourth year was spent doing postgrad courses – his MA and my PGCE. By the time he’d proposed we’d lived together for nearly four years, had a steady income, and had been making plans towards our future whilst he did his PhD, and what we would do following that. It’s also been good to give me something to distract myself with whilst at my boring just-pay-the-rent job, until he gets a job and we switch so I can try and find something I love as much as he loves his job.

 

We’ll be married about two weeks before our 9-year anniversary.

Post # 81
Member
12 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2015

Well my Fiance and i have known each other since the start of highschool when we were both 13. I only said yes to dating him when i turned 18 and we got engaged just before my 22nd birthday. So for us it was officially 4 years. We just thought the time was right and we were planning on buying a house together so it had to happen ๐Ÿ™‚ 

Post # 82
Member
836 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

We were together six yrs before getting engaged. It’s actually my fault as he wanted to much sooner. I had a terribly abusive marriage which my fiance is aware of as we were great friends at that time. We have been together for eight yrs now.

Post # 83
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

A year and a half we dated, which was perfect for us because even three months into our relationship, people were asking how long we were married and how many kids we had. It gave us just the right amount of time to build trust and see how we work together. We got engaged and are one year in to a two year engagement, and we are spending that time getting to know each other better on a more intimate level (IE: living together)

Post # 84
Bee
615 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012 - Mother of the Bride\'s residence

We were together for about one year, nine months before getting engaged. I think at that point, we both felt we really knew one another quite well — especially after taking on a harrowing cross-country motorcycle road trip together! While in the grand scheme of things it wasn’t a huge amount of time to be together, Mr. D and I meshed really well together from the start. We were dating within weeks of meeting, moved in together after a few months, and after getting married jumped pretty quickly into parenthood and home ownership.

Post # 85
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: May 2015

We dated for about 5.5 years before we got engaged. Since we started dating while I was still in college, we knew that we were going to wait awhile until we had semi-established careers and were more “grown up”. After moving in together a few months ago we figured it was the logical next step, and that worked for me! I didn’t want an engagment that went on 2, 3, 4 years, so it just made sense to wait until we were a little more settled so we could afford a wedding within (hopefully!) 18 months of the proposal.

Post # 86
Member
3419 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Manhattan Church Rec Center

We dated or 5 years and 4 months before he popped the question.

It was right for us because we spent the first 3 years getting to know each other, stuggling financially, playing house and FIGURING OUT what it is to be in a mature relationship. Also getting our financial selves together

At year 3.5 we officially moved in together into our first apartment. That was very important to us that we lived together first before moving on to the next phase.

I was disapointed that he did not propose on our 5 year anniversary, and I think he knew that, but I found out later that when we went to meet his family 6 weeks before, he had told his family that he was going to marrry me. Which made me feel like crap because I remember having a meltdown on vaca about my fear that he wasn’t going to propose. At the time of our anni – he was figuring our his finances in order to get the rign.

On Christmas Eve he proposed.

I think it was the right time. We were BOTH ready and understood the significance of what we were promising each other.

Post # 87
Hostess
2555 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

We dated for about 3 years before getting engaged.  It was great for us because we lived together about 2 of those years.  It really allowed us to test our dynamic under the same roof before committing to forever.

Post # 88
Member
1409 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

He proposed a year and five months after we started dating. We first said I love you two and a half months in, and basically I started a gradual-moving in a week after that lol. A little soon, but I was living a half an hour away, with 3 roommates in a 2 bedroom apartment, and starting my last semester of college, so I basically only would have seen him on weekends, and that was not enough. ๐Ÿ˜› Before I met him I had always thought I’d want to be with someone for at least two years before getting engaged, but I revised it to being in love for at least a year, and at one point after we’d been talking about it told him I’d be very disappointed if we got to the 2 year mark without getting engaged,  he’d gotten me too excited lol! We’re having a 15 month engagement, so when we tie the knot we’ll have been together for almost two years and nine months. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 89
Member
1540 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

he proposed on our 6 year anniversary. It did feel long. I would have been happy with him proposing after 5, but we’re still only 26. He wanted to get me a ring that I love especially because we know some people who don’t love their ering because their Fiance didn’t have the money for it.

We’re not religious, and we’ve already been living together for 4 years. We don’t see marriage as making the commitment because we’ve already commited to spending our lives together. We see it as a celebration with our families, and we want to make sure we do it right. So, we wanted to wait until we had the time/money to throw the party that we want.

Post # 90
Member
3448 posts
Sugar bee

@Mrs. Penguin:  FH and I were dating exactly 9 months before I proposed to him. It was perfect because (for me) it was love at first sight, and I knew I did not want to let him go. I also wanted him to know I was committed to him and wanted to be with him for the rest of my life.

 

Part of this is also our 7+ year long engagement. Since, when I proposed, was so shortly after we started dating, we needed time to get to know each other by living together, loving together, and growing together.

 

 

Post # 91
Member
1684 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

We got engaged after 8 years of dating and 1.5 years of living together.

We started dating when we were 18, so waiting made sense for us. 

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