(Closed) The Disgrace of Infertility

posted 4 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
1495 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

Sending you tons of hugs. I hope you get your BFP soon. 🙁

Post # 4
11178 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

@jny1179:  I’m so sorry for another let down. Your baby is coming! I am sure it is defeating and frustrating and I am sorry.

We have relatives that tried for 3 1/2 years and finally had twins thanks to a second round of IVF. Amazing things are possible!

Post # 5
8471 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@jny1179:  *HUGS* Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Post # 7
2907 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Keeping my fingers crossed for that little seed of hope to grow into your baby soon!

Post # 8
1534 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@jny1179:  Great article! Thank you for sharing.  TTC is so hard.

Post # 9
374 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@jny1179:  Thank you.

I needed to read this so badly.  I’ve been off the TTC boards for awhile, too frustrated, angry, and hopeless to read let alone contribute anything positive to the discussions.  Yesterday, I had some variation of the conversations he talked about three different times.  And then go take my new metformin prescription and hope it didn’t make me throw up.  I wasn’t sure what possessed me to hop over here today – now I know.  I wouldn’t have seen this on my own and I desperately needed to read it.

Post # 10
7656 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@jny1179:  So sorry you’re going through this. Fingers crossed for a BFP soon 🙂

Post # 11
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@jny1179:  I wish you weren’t going through this.  I’m so so sorry.  Thank you for posting that article.  I’m not going through what you’re going through, but it applies to me in that I feel that same disgrace with my recurrent losses.  Every BFP, every pregnancy announcement… its just so defeating.  Try to stay positive.  FX that this is your cycle <3

Post # 12
2068 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@jny1179:  Thank you for posting this. 

Post # 14
6065 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2012

@jny1179:  My heart goes out to you. You helped me so much in my time of need on the bee, and I wish I could do the same for you.

I believe you will be a mother. Your wedding is coming up so soon. Maybe it will help to be occupied with that very happy and exciting event and then as you said…afterwards the rest will come.


Post # 15
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Thank you for sharing! This is a lovely article 🙂

Post # 16
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

This really hit home with me,and I’m not too proud to admit made me tear up a bit. We will have been trying four years in February,and on Thursday I babe a doctors appointment that I’m fully expecting us to be told our only chance of conceiving is through IVF.

Its a long,hard road and I wouldn’t wish it upon my worst enemy. The only thing I didn’t connect with in the article is the “disgrace” part.

yes ,there is something wrong with me, but no, it is not,and never has been, my fault. There is nothing I could have done to bring about a different outcome and there’s nothing I can do now. Its outside of my control. With all of the other emotions that may come with this rollercoaster journey, I’m grateful that this shame isn’t another thing that is piled in top of everything else.


Also, I just wanted to add, I am ridiculously open when it comes to talking about it. I understand this isn’t for everyone,but it has “helped” me an enormous deal. I feel like the minute I try and hide this huge part of my life from people, that it gives infertility a power over me, and that its something I should be ashamed of. All I can hope to do by sharing my experience is help bring understanding to others, and encourage women to talk about it more, and it not be a “taboo” subject.


The anger,upset and confusion never really go away, but I will say it has become slightly easier to manage and it doesn’t feel as tumultuous now as it once was.


I hope the very best for you, and will keep everything crosse for you!!

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