(Closed) The dreaded A & B lists – when to request RSVPs

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
303 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I don’t think it’s impolite. Your timeline sounds very good, I’d stick with it.

Post # 4
7300 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

Why does your caterer need the final number so far out? most I have talk to say they get the final number about a week before the event. In any case, your timeline seems okay.

Post # 6
643 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I love this!

I am July 9th as well. We are asking for RSVP’s earlier than you.

Our caterer wants 2 weeks in advance, the needing RSVP’s is more for us and space!

Our B list folks are A list caliber, but we are SO tight for space, we had to just have family in the first round, friends in the second.

For me, the company I work for asks for our vacation requests by March 1st for the year, so like….I don’t think what we’re doing is unreasonable.

Most of our guests are Out of Town (17 hour drive, or flight away) so like….by April 1st (when we are asking for RSVP by!) you have to be thinking about the travel plans for 3 months away. We are taking invitations to these guests at Christmas when we visit, super early, and they will have had the invite for three full months before being asked to commit.

As we get “no”s we will send invites to friends….so important!

Post # 7
987 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

timeline is ok. 


to speed things up with the A list – I’d talk to your close friends and get them to help RSVPs happen quickly as possible.  Obviously can’t fasten things up for all people, but if you get some done it may help. 

Post # 8
190 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Timeline sounds good….just be ready to be on the phone. People are BAD about RSVPs and since you need accurate numbers without much cushion time, you’ll have to call some people.

Post # 9
392 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Timeline sounds good.


I’m getting married June 10th.

We are sending out the first round March 18th and requiring them back by April 29 and then round two will be May 6th and requested back by the end of May.

Our b-list is old friends and more co-workers that we’d love to invite but ran out of room.

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