(Closed) The dreaded Thank You cards.

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3051 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

@figgnewton:  Well geez that was rude! I’m not married yet so I can’t tell you what I’ve done but I usually send thank you cards out ASAP. You do have a certain window though (I’m not sure what it is, I’m SURE another bee will let you know) and 2 of my cousins took about 3 months to get the cards out because they had professional pictures to wait on. I didn’t mind that.

If you didn’t have pictures I would probably wonder what took so long but I definitely wouldn’t say it out loud! Also if you had other things going on…moving in together after the wedding, a long honeymoon, etc….then I would understand as well.

Post # 4
13891 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Well, she was rude for making a comment, but I personally believe that four months is too long.  I think thank you cards should be prompt and personalized, and that four months is really pushing that.  (The rule is guests have a year to send a gifts, not that the couple has a year to get out thank you cards). 

Regardless, it was tactless for the recipient to respond like that. 

Post # 5
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

It was rude of her to comment, but the couple is encouraged to get notes out ASAP – after the grace period of the honeymoon, of course.

Post # 6
938 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969 - City, State

I’m JUST sending mine out now and I got married in June.  DH and I moved to a different country after the wedding, and not getting our photos back until January also delayed them.  If someone has a problem with that, then don’t accept our “thank you” is really all I can say :S 

I think you are spot on timewise in terms of sending them out!  I’ve been to weddings and didn’t receive one at all!

Post # 7
3625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

View original reply
@abbie017:  +1

It was rather tasteless of her to respond like that. She should’ve just said “thanks” and kept the comments to herself. That said, 4 months is a rather long time to get Thank You cards out. We got ours out in 2 months (and even by then, DH was antsy). To your credit, a lot of people don’t send them out at all.

Post # 9
8469 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Um, I got married in July and haven’t done them yet. I have reasons, but too many to type while I’m on my phone. 

Post # 10
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

It was rude of her to call you out on the lateness, but you are sending them out late.

Post # 11
1102 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: City, State

Her comment was rude but IMO 4 months is way too long to be sending out thank yous.

Post # 12
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Her comment was rude, you waited way too long to get them out. Both of you made mistakes, consider it a wash and let it go.

I don’t really get “dreading” thank you notes? I am excited to write ours (and have been writing them as gifts have been received). It gives me a warm fuzzy to make sure my guests know how grateful we are…

Post # 13
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

Her comment was really rude. I think 4 months is on the boundary of getting too long so I won’t say that it’s too long.

Post # 14
2555 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

View original reply
@NAvery:  I completely dread them too. I don’t understand why I can’t just thank them in person or make a call. Oh well.

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