(Closed) the f#$^ kitchen is always dirty

posted 6 years ago in Home
Post # 3
Member
3374 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Why do you have to clean it? I would just let it sit there if I were you. I only clean up after Darling Husband and I!

Post # 4
Member
856 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@Mrsgurzakovic:  Maybe try to set up a rotating schedule so that it isn’t too much of a burden for you. It’s not exactly considerate of them to do that to you. They are busy, yes, but I am sure they can account for five extra mins in the morning so they can at least put the darn box of cereal away! 

Post # 5
Member
2959 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@PinkMagnolia:  Exactly! There is no way I would clean up after them!

Post # 7
Hostess
23597 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

HAhaha dude, my sentiments exactly!

Post # 9
Member
5428 posts
Bee Keeper

Being a part of the family doesn’t mean you have to clean up after EVERYBODY! That’s not fair and I would talk to the offending ones, Mother-In-Law and SIL about cleaning their own messes. And about sharing the cereal… I would put my name on the box and that should tell them all to get their own!

Post # 11
Member
2118 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@Mrsgurzakovic:  Exactly, you’re a PART of the family. You do your part, they do theirs. If they are making a huge mess and not cleaning up, that does not mean your part is to be their maid. I’d clean up your mess, DH’s mess, and just to show you really do want to help, SOME of their mess. But then you need to be strong and not get taken advantage of. What does your MIL/SIL do around the house to clean up after you? If you completely clean up after yourself and they do nothing to help you out, how are you expected to do everything for them as well? Tell your Darling Husband that it’s a terrible mess every morning that they do nothing to help with and you’re BUSY. Just because classes are online does not mean you aren’t busy. Heck, some classes I’ve taken online have required me to do MORE work than my classes I went in for, because you have to teach yourself so much more.

I’m not sure what to tell you about them eating your food.. Do you eat theirs as well? That would annoy me so bad. My freshman year of college I’d buy myself food and one of my roommates would eat ALL of it before I had any… we definitely didn’t share anything besides bread/milk/eggs, so I started putting my special/expensive food in my room.

Hugs! I’m sorry your living arrangements are like this.. it would drive me nuts. How much longer are you going to be living with them? Any chance y’all are working your way out of there? Just because you’re new to the home doesn’t mean you get to be taken advantage of, which is what your MIL/SIL sound like they’re doing. I have a strong suspicion they wouldn’t leave such a mess if you didn’t live there…

Post # 13
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

Why are you living with the Mother-In-Law and SIL and how long do you foresee this arrangement? I would not put up with messy people and clean up after them. Everybody should do their share. It sounds as if your husband is more concerned with his mom, than you and that is not OK. Sounds as if the living arrangements are affecting your marriage big-time. 🙁

Post # 14
Member
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

@Jenn23:  Agree.

This sounds like an awful living situation.  Can you move out on your own? 

Post # 15
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

So I saw this picture on pinterest and I love, love, love it.  I am constantly cleaning up after my Fiance and his daughter (she’s 15 and helps out so much, so not really peeved at her).  But maybe this would help?

Source:  hahafunnylol.com

 

If not, at least it might give you a few minutes of laughter.

 

On a more serious note, is this a cultural thing, or is this a temporary living situation?  I can see that perhaps sucking it up for a little while is one thing, but I don’t see how this is fair to make you do this each time.  I don’t like how your hubby is lecturing you either.  I don’t mean to be rude or anything, but this is an equal partnership and if he wants you to feel like a queen and be sure to know that your Mother-In-Law and SIL are helping you out then maybe he needs to spend a week learning what you do to keep the house “ship shape.”  While you are now part of the family, you are stil you and he doesn’t have any right to tel you to conform and lose sight of who you are.  Sorry to be tough and I say this with a lot of kindness, so please don’t take this the wrong way.  Just want you to feel supported.  

Post # 16
Member
9139 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

I can tell you from experience that if you leave it they will leave it longer.  I have a roommate that is not nearly as clean as I am and the kitchen is the worst.  He will cook a meal and leave all of the dishes in the sink and there it will sit until kingdom come.  Even after I make sure to clean out the dishwasher and leave it cracked so he can see that it’s empty and ready to be filled with dirty dishes.  My advice?

Deal with it.  If you like things to be cleaned up you clean them up.  You can say something to them about helping but honestly they will probably go right back to their old habits after a few days.  If you absolutely cannot stand it then it’s time to move out.  My FH and I are getting our own place after the current lease with this roommate expires.  It’s way cheaper to live with a roommate but we are tired of playing Cinderella by always being the ones that clean up the house.  We are both pretty clean and the mess level will significantly drop once we have our own place.

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