(Closed) The Hyphenated Name

posted 7 years ago in Names
  • poll: What are you doing with your last name?
    Only Bride is hyphenating : (7 votes)
    35 %
    Only Groom is hyphenating : (1 votes)
    5 %
    Both Hyphenating : (3 votes)
    15 %
    Keeping Birth names, giving kids hyphenated name : (2 votes)
    10 %
    Keeping Birth names, kids get his name : (4 votes)
    20 %
    Keeping Birth names, kids get her name : (0 votes)
    Keeping Birth name, don't know about kids : (2 votes)
    10 %
    Using Birth name professionaly : (1 votes)
    5 %
    He is taking my name : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    4653 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I wanted Fi to do this but he wont… I am either Hyphenating or not changing mine at all. 

    Post # 4
    5118 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Mr.ND won’t hypenate, but I will. I’m actually ok with that, and happy that my kids will have just our shared last name, not mine as well (the line of work I plan to do makes me NOT want my future kids easily associated with me).

    Today we took our graduation photos, and I got to write out my new name for the first time! It was more fun than it should have been 🙂  We aren’t married yet, but by the time they go to print, we will be, so I used the new one. Wee!

    Post # 5
    266 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    the fi actually offered the both hyphenating option first.

    i really couldn’t see not hyphenating. If changing your name is really supposed to symbolize the beginning of a new family, then why do I have to change my name to show that I have joined one but he doesn’t? it was so perfect.

    I probably will not in the end have him follow through with this, his family is quite traditional and I think explaining this to them makes him uncomfortable. Any future children (though we aren’t planning any) would carry both names.

    Post # 6
    1798 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    We’re not doing that. We are each keeping our own last name, but we agreed that when we have kids, their lastname with be hyphenated

    Post # 7
    686 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Yeah, I didn’t take the poll because I’m not taking his last name or hyphenating mine.  We’re both keeping our birth names.

    Not sure yet what we’re going to do when it comes to children – we’re both open to either last name, but I don’t want them to have a hyphenated last name because in my experience, it comes with assumptions and well as confusion on the record-keeping front.  (One office will file Mrs. Smith-Rice’s records under “S,” another under “R” another will not include the hyphen, etc.)

    Post # 8
    14496 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I changed my name to his.  He was very traditional in this sense and wanted me to take his name and not even hypenate, much less change his to include mine as well.

    Post # 9
    284 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I’m hyphenating–for professional purposes, I’m keeping maiden name. In my personal life I’ll use my new last name. Our kids will not be hyphenated but have the new last name

    Post # 11
    686 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    So should I vote “no” above because we’re keeping our birth names, but not giving kids hyphenated names?

    Post # 13
    1240 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    not sure what to do with this. I really REALLY have a love/hate with my last name. It’s 11 letters. My first name is 9, middle is only 3. So to hyphenate is just… Well It’d be Elizabeth Ann Abcdefghij-Abcdef (obviously changed the last name… My name is just SO long already…

    Post # 14
    686 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @currentbee:  I guess where I’m coming from is that I’ve seen the other side of it, which is that it can easily become a hassle because there’s not a single system for how to catalogue last names, especially when combined they’re over, say, 12 characters.

    Whereas in Mexico and in other countries, your name reflects your paternal and maternal heritage, and everyone knows how to deal with two last names because everyone has them.

    With regard to last names of our children, I am deeply set against a hyphen, but open to them having my name or his.  Possibly mine because it’s more unique, but I see us going with a first name that reflects my cultural heritage and his Anglo last name.  (My current last name is not Latino, but that is what I identify most strongly as.)

    Post # 15
    330 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Not sure! 🙁 I really like my last name. It just goes so well with my first name. I also hate to lose that part of me. Not sure if I want to hyphenate either, because then it may be too long. Yet, if I take only his last name, my name would sound kind of common. Hmm.

    Post # 16
    2550 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I took DH’s last name.  I was going to hypenate and then decided when we were getting our license, I didn’t want a long last name.  My maiden was 3 letters and I’m now 4 letters.  But actually when I thought about it, I was more than thrilled to take his.  Its a new phase of my life and after 41yrs, I my family name will live on through my nephews.

    The topic ‘The Hyphenated Name’ is closed to new replies.

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