Post # 1
Hi there Bee-Girls!
I am sure this has been posted to death… but … here’s my quandry…
Should our parents meet BEFORE or AFTER an engagement? What is the ettiquette on this?
My b/f has recently offered to host dinner next month so that our parents can meet. My parents live about 3000kms away (in the maritimes) and his parents live in our city.
I am “over joyed” that he has offered such a sweet gesture… as he is very traditional in his outlook when it comes to dating and courtships. I see this as a very positive sign forward in our relationship!
So to the Ladies … how soon before or after your engagement did your parents meet? Is this a sign of an impending proposal on the horizon?
The same day that my b/f offered to host the “meeting” dinner at his house he also noted that he’s planning something in secret for me… that he can’t tell me yet because all the plans aren’t ready yet.
I also heard him talking to his mother on the phone (whom I adore) after Valentine’s day noting he “hadn’t done it yet” … and that there was a “special milestone coming up that he is waiting to instead.” I asked him outright what “milestone” was scheduled this month and asked him if it had to do with work… he shrugged it off and noted he wasn’t sure what I was talking about.
Maybe I am reading too much into all of this… but we have been talking ALOT about marriage and engagement lately. We’ve more or less moved-in together (i literally have spent 10 hours in my loft since the Christmas holidays) … and he’s even entertaining conversations around “jewelry purchases i’d like” as of late.
Last weekend we were out for dinner with his parents. My b/f slipped to the bathroom and his mother was talking the entire dinner about a mutual friend of my b’fs who had announced his engagement and wedding plans. When my b/f excused himself to go to the washroom… his mom proceeded to tell me that my b/f is VERY happy with our relationship… and that they are very happy as well. I almost felt like they were giving me their blessing about something. I responded by telling them how happy i was as well.
And one other big… huge… change that seems to be a “tipping point” that is leading me to believe that my b/f is considering proposing soon is that he is seriously contemplating selling his sportscar. He keeps stating that it was a “phase” that he’s outgrown… and how it doesn’t fit in his life anymore.
Sorry for the long-winded posting… but I would love some feedback as to what is the right time for our parents to meet and whether it is a sign of “more to come”?
Post # 3
My family lives around 350 miles away and met his family within 6 months of us dating. We didn’t get engaged until 5 years into the relationship…
Post # 4
Our parents met after our engagement. I think it just depends on the people and situation. Every situation is different.
Post # 5
We’ve been engaged for 5 months and our mothers just met last weekend. Our fathers have not met, and my mother hasn’t met his father/vice versa. I’m from New England and his parents live in Florida, so it’s a big trip for anyone to meet anyone else!
Etiquette says that the groom’s parents are supposed to reach out to the bride’s parents immediately following the engagement, but that’s just one of those old-fashioned rules. Do whatever works for you guys!
Post # 6
My mom met his mom and family about 6 months before the proposal. But when my dad met his family for the first time, he proposed the same weekend.
I would definitely say the proposal is in the works.
Post # 7
Our parents met around the 7 month mark, and we’re just celebrated our 5th anniversary as a couple. There hasn’t been a technical proposal because that’s really more of a signal that we’re ready to start putting down deposits and the like on a wedding for us. However, the point where we transitioned to a domestic partnership was probably about 2 years in. Considering that’s the level of commitment you’re talking about, I presume that’s the more important timeline.
Because the parents meeting each other is so radically different for every couple, I personally wouldn’t put much into it. It sounds like you’ve detected other signs that may point to a proposal. Just enjoy the dinner for what it is. For us, our folks got along very well, and we now host holidays regularly with both of them. In that regard, it wasn’t anything special about a ring on a finger, but rather about us starting our new traditions that involve both sides of the family instead of picking one over the other.
Post # 8
Our parents still haven’t met! Sounds like an engament is looming though….
Post # 9
Well technically our Dads met before Boyfriend or Best Friend and I met. They used to work together! Our parents officially met when they helped me move in with my Boyfriend or Best Friend, and they’ve met a few times since then. I suppose it’s a little easier though since we live 10 minutes way from BF’s parents 15 minutes away from my parents. And our parents live like 5 minutes apart…
Post # 10
Our parents all met eachother at our wedding. Ha ha!
Post # 11
I think our parents wll meet at the wedding. Due to various reasons, may be too difficult to get together ahead of time.
Yep, definitely feels lilke a step forward in the relationship!
Post # 12
Definitely sounds like the relationship is moving forward !!
My parents met my Fiance parents a few months before we got engaged. We knew for a longtime that we had planned to get engaged but when they met we weren’t. Also, Fiance family is from another country on the other side of the world so it was a convenient time for them to meet because they were all in the same city for Fiance graduation. Additionally, FI’s father passed away in October so if they didn’t get to meet when they did, my parents never would have gotten to meet him 🙁 my brother and his wife also got to meet them which I’m so happy about. My sister was out of town so she didn’t get to meet him. But I’m grateful that it worked out the way it did as my parents got to meet my late father in law at least once.
Post # 13
Our parents met each other the week before our 2nd “official” wedding. We’d been legally married for 6 months by that time. 🙂 Our families live 6k miles away, sooooo…..
Post # 14
Our parents met…on our Wedding Day!! lol and I knew they wouldn’t get along, which is why I warned his parents how catty my parents can be, and why I made sure it was mandatory that we have wine at the table!
As for a sign of more things to come…I’d put money on it!! *crosses fingers for you*
Post # 15
We set up a dinner for our parents after we got engaged! Sounds like he’s going to propose!
Post # 16
Our parents met about 4 months after we got engaged! It went well!