(Closed) The Name Change?!?

posted 10 years ago in Married Life
Post # 17
Member
744 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I had my own reasoning for not being comfortable changing my name but I will be when I get the proper documentation in the mail, and I’ll change things as I renew it, not going out of my way to do it.  I’m also not changing my name at work – as long as I’m in the same industry I’m keeping my maiden name, but if I change industries I’ll go with my married name. 

 

Post # 18
Member
3343 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I thought you had to make the choice to change your name or not when you obtained the marriage license?  I guess it’s different in Canada?

Post # 19
Member
3313 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

It was an easy choice for me and I’ve had no qualms about it since then.  🙂  I love my new last name!!

Post # 20
Member
311 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

It was a hard choice for me, so I decided to hyphenate.  I couldn’t bear the thought of giving up my last name, not just because of identity, but because I am really the last one left in my family with my name.  It was hard to even hyphenate, but DH wanted me to take his name and that was our compromise.  Do what is most comfortable for you and your husband.

I don’t think the rhyming is really a big deal, though it does make me think of the Married with Children episode when Marcy married Jefferson and said “my name is Marcy D’arcy?” 

 

Post # 21
Member
144 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2006

I decided to keep my entire name and add his to the end– so I’m MyFirst MyMiddle MyLast (which is now a second middle) HisLast. I got to keep everything, plus I get his last name too. To me it’s a win-win! They made me hyphenate my two middle names on my drivers license, but other than that no one gave me any problems!

Post # 22
Member
222 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I have a beautiful maiden name and it will be hard to let it go.

My sister chose to hyphenate and she regrets it because it’s so long and has caused her some headache.

I have been playing with the idea of adding my maiden name as my middle name. I don’t think I would mind having 2 middle names, but I would have a hard time with 2 last names.

Post # 24
Member
747 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

i am having a very similar issue! now, my last name is one of the most common last names, but it works well with my first name. Fiance last name rhymes with my first name- it sounds bad, really bad, even he laughs at it! I am leaning toward dropping my middle name (starts with the same letter as Fiance last name) and replacing it with Fiance last name and leaving my last name at the end- that way i get to keep my initials & it somehow doesn’t sound so bad! i’ve assured him that i will be Mrs (his last name), because Mrs means the wife of Mr, but that the name just doesn’t sound good. he agrees. so keeping your last name & adding his as a middle is another possibility!

Post # 25
Member
2004 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

I went the two-middles route. My married name rhymes a bit too with my first name (both end with the same sound). It’s not a total rhyme, but there’s a sing-songy quality to it, I think. I kind of like the rhyme! Why don’t you try out a different name informally for awhile and see how you feel about it? 

Post # 26
Member
2343 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I don’t have any personal issue with changing my name. I go by DH’s name at work and socially now and I tacked it on after my maiden name on Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn. But I am just too freakin’ lazy to go through all the steps to make it legal. And what difference does it make? I probably won’t until we have kids.

Post # 27
Member
3756 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I am definitely going to take his last name =) that is a huge part of who I am going to be so i will proudly take his name 

Post # 28
Member
785 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I am definitely taking his name.  Right now the choice seems really easy, because my last name is really annoying.  90% of the time it is misspelled and mispronounced, and I am sick of it.  My last name doesn’t really mean that much to me because it is such a hassle, and at this point it seems like it’ll be a relief to finally shed it for a more manageable name.  My middle name means much more to me and my identity, as it is my grandmother’s name, so that one is definitely staying happily in place. Also, another incentive to take his name is that we will have the same initials if I do, and I think that that’s really cute and fun 🙂

Post # 29
Member
744 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@Jojo Bananas – you’re not forced to do it at any point…you can’t legally have your name changed on any documentation until you get your marriage certificate, which once you’re married when you since your “marriage licence”, you can apply for 8-10 weeks later and the official certificate comes in the mail.  That’s your proof to take to the financial institutions/government offices to change your ID and everything else over.  If you choose not to change your name you just keep the certificate, or not apply for it at all.  I know a lot of women who didn’t bother ordering the official certificate because of no intention to change their name, you don’t need it to prove anything on your taxes when you mark yourself as being married.

The only other time it comes into play is divorce and remarriage.

Edit: you have the option of “assuming” your partners name, which means, you take the certificate as proof to the places you want to change your last name to (i.e. license, bank, etc) and in the event of divorce you take your birth certificate back to those places to change your name back to your maiden name

or

you legally change your name – as in – you go to the government and change the name that’s on your birth certificate.

Post # 30
Member
987 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

I knew that I definitely wanted to change to his name but I struggled a little bit actually doing it.  However once it was changed, I was pleased and have almost forgotten my maiden name now!  It didn’t end up being a big deal. 

I didn’t want my future children having a different name to me and I felt it did make us more of a family unit with the same name. 

 

Post # 31
Member
115 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I didn’t change my last name. My mother didn’t change her last name either so it seemed pretty natural for me- I’m not really concerned about having kids in the future because I never really thought twice about how my mom’s last name was different from mine. She was still my mother. No one at school got confused either.

I was thinking about changing my last name for a while, since my husband’s last name is simpler than mine, and I think he would have secretly liked it (even though he said that it didn’t matter to him). However, I started looking into how complicated it was- not just with the forms but also because I’m a scholar who has some things under my belt with my maiden name. In the end, it made more sense for me to keep my original name.

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