(Closed) The Name Change?!?

posted 10 years ago in Married Life
Post # 32
Member
457 posts
Helper bee

I’m at the 5 month mark and still have not changed mine and probably won’t.

I was always said I would never change my name though, it’s me, it’s who I am, and I just couldn’t change it. I was engaged once before my DH and my ex Fi didn’t care that I felt that way so I didn’t think much of it. However now, my DH would never make me change my name and understands my feelings, but I know he would love to have me to share his last name, so to make him happy, on our address labels I put his last name as mine and when I write out things to people like our Christmas cards and such I’ll put his last name as mine. I am just not legally changing it and in my professional field I still go by my maiden name and all our banking is still with my maiden name, and we both agree it’s more of a pain to change all that. So we get the best of both worlds, he can still see me use his last name with things but I still get to be me. I think when we have kids I may hypen, but not sure as my last name is 10 letters long and so is his…so that is mighty long!

Post # 33
Member
2066 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m super traditional and always knew I’d change my name.  Then I changed it and was in tears after getting my new drivers license.  I guess I wasn’t prepared for how hard it would be to do it.  Five months post name change, I’m still getting used to it.  A big part of that is because I changed my name in my 30s.  I don’t regret changing my name, but it was a lot harder on me than I thought.

Good luck with your decision.

Post # 34
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

This was not an easy decision for me due to both personal and professional reasons.  One thing that you also need to be careful of is what the state laws will let you do.  In NY, I had to be somewhat sneaky to get the name change I was comfortable with (myFirst myMiddle myLast newLast).  I do not like hyphenated last names, at least for me.  It has been six months and I’m getting used to being MyFirst NewLast. Professionally I have two last names and it has been great.    

Post # 35
Member
4410 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010 - Savannah, GA

It was so easy for me to change my name.  I wanted to take my maiden name as my middle name, but I was told in Michigan, I’d need a court order. I could have hyphenated my last name, but I never liked that. 

So I just took his last name, and I’m so glad I did.  I mean, it is worth it to see him beam with pride every time I get mail with his last name on it.  It makes him so happy that I took his last name, that it was more than worth it.

I’ve never been attached to my last name. I’ve never considered it part of my identity. My first name is my identity, so changing my last name wasn’t an issue at all. I didn’t have any remorse or sadness about changing it. And again, it makes him so happy, that if it had been a sacrifice, it would have been a small one.

But I will admit I still have to think when I have to give my full name, but it’s only been a month.

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