(Closed) The One with the Expensive Wedding?

posted 7 years ago in Money
Post # 47
Member
254 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

We spent around 60K and that was in So Cal…and that was trying to be on the low end compared to our circle of friend. That kind of money is pretty customary in NYC.  Going to a rhode island newport mansion wedding later this year that is going to be insane. did not discuss the budget with anyone though…just Fiance and I knew. just ignore people who talk smack bout stuff..at the end of the day its your wedding and it will be beautiful! =)

Post # 48
Member
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@MrsWBS:  +1

 

People probably “found out” the same way you’re splashing it out here?

Post # 49
Member
526 posts
Busy bee

@mockblock:  +1

Who cares what you spend?  But make it a good wedding, if you’re spending that much.

One of my friends got married at the Hilton right on the beach.  I know she spent about 60K.  The food SUCKED.  The beef had way too much wine in the sauce, and the pasta was dried out.  It was a very bland wedding in general, and we sat around the whole time, bored to tears, because they didn’t even start the dancing until they cut the cake.  We were so happy to leave! 

Another of our friends spent 15K on her wedding, and she got her catering company to BBQ tri tip and chicken on site.  The food was phenomenal!  There were lots of activities besides dancing, an amazing dessert bar, a fun photobooth. 

So in the end, it’s not the amount of money you spend that determines how good of a wedding you have.  🙂

Post # 50
Member
2447 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Don’t talk finances amongst your friends, it never leads to anything good. At best, you’ll make people feel bad that they don’t have that kind of money. At worst, you’ll have a parade of haters outside of your door.

Post # 51
Member
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

$40,000 isn’t surprising if you are getting married in the NYC area at all.  We are having 200+ guests at our wedding which is what is driving our budget WAY up there, but even without that, all our vendors/attire/beauty/etc still came out to roughly $20,000. It’s expensive up here! Do what you want and don’t worry about what they say.

Post # 52
Member
1462 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I have an unlimited budget it is what my Fiance wants and I am giving him what he wants. I could careless what anyone thinks about what WE are doing. How we choose to spend our money may not be what others think based on their lives or how they would spend the money if they had it.

I am not mentioning the amount because I am not in the mood for comments on why it is a waste. What people dont understand is when you plan a wedding and you spend what they think is too much we are adults and we know what we can afford. We dont need anyone to tells us what they think.

I totally understand how you feel it is very frustrating when you are trying to plan a wedding and enjoy the process only for someone to be a Debbie Downer.:( You are going to have to decide whether you will continue to share your plans with them or not.

Everyone who knows us knows this is our lifestyle so they dont bother to question us. I am not going to convince anyone why we are doing what we choose.

Enjoy planning your wedding without feeling bad.

BIG HUG

 

Post # 53
Member
7456 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

We shared our budget with friends. Not in a “oh By The Way our wedding costs $$” but a lot of us are getting married around the same time. A couple friends forwarded me their budget breakdown and mine on. We didn’t do this to brag, it’s just helpful for a bride to see real numbers when she’s starting out. Also, some of us helped others venue search and to do that you need a rough idea of the budget. I don’t think people should be judging the OP because her friends know. You don’t know the situation.

 

 

 

Post # 54
Member
3570 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I dont understand how anyone knows your budget… even if they looked on the knot.  I guess I’m not understanding what really happened.  My budget was almost double yours, but no one in the real world has any idea what my wedding cost

Post # 55
Member
8439 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@SomeoneBeautiful:  I think it’s because of your area.  I’ve heard that the NY/NJ area is notoriously expensive for weddings.  It’s your money, you should be able to spend it how you see fit.

Post # 56
Member
2902 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I am going to quite a few weddings of good friends this year and I have no idea how much they are spending. It’s not a discussion because no one cares. It sounds like you have put yourself in this position. 

Post # 57
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2015

With the size of my SO’s family, I’d be lucky to get away with a 60K wedding. The average here is about $50K. It all depends on the number of people you’re inviting and where you want to have it. It’s your day, they’re just jealous.

Post # 58
Member
216 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

If its people in your bridal party commenting did you think perhaps they are worried they won’t be able to attend or not afford to be in your bridal party based on what they would need to contribute? Maybe they can’t afford to be part of something that involves buying an expensive dress and shoes, not to mention the extra party type things. Are you buying their outfits and paying for their accommodations? 

Also stop discussing your budget with people, if you bring it up you leave yourself open to commentary

Post # 59
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2013

A good friend of mine spent over $50,000 on hers mine is less than $5,000 its not what you spend that matters yes it would be nice to have the extra $$$ but in the end its just one day. People are giving me crap about $5,000 because they think it’s too much and, my family wanted it to be a small CH wedding its not what i wanted so I’m doing it my way on my small budget and I’m ok with it in the end your the one who its for

Post # 60
Member
3795 posts
Honey bee

@SomeoneBeautiful:  Everyone has different budgets, but here’s a tip, don’t share financial information with other people, if you don’t want to hear their opinion! By The Way, I’m having one of those barn/rustic/bbq weddings, and its costing me 50K…don’t judge a book by its cover, and they won’t judge you by yours.

 

Post # 61
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@SomeoneBeautiful:  My budget is 65K (and we’re pushing that…) but we’re in the same boat as you…we waited 6 years to get married, are financially stable and still saving, and are excited to have a bomb ass classy wedding (not that smaller budget weddings aren’t nice and classy, they are awesome too!), but my point is I totally get where you’re coming from.

 

However, I haven’t heard a peep from anyone about the budget because no one but Fiance and my parents knows the budget. Frankly, it’s none of their business. My dad just told me ysterday he’s so proud of us for being able to throw such a lavish party, but still being financially responsible about things.

 

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