- 9 years ago
- Wedding: June 2010
Have any of you bees ever been the other woman?
I ask this because sometimes I feel like I am the only person. I said I would never…..and suddenly I was. This is about my life.
Mr3m and I dated 8 years ago, we were both young and crazy and fell in love immediately. We had went to school together but I paid him no attn then. When we met a few years after h.s (he was 4 years older), he alreday had an ex and 2 daughters. Perhaps I should have ran…but i didnt.
We dated for a short time, but in that short time he talked of wanting to plan a future all these great things we would do, then we broke up and I really wasnt sure why we broke up. We remained friends, yet went our own ways and every few months he would call, or I would call. It started off very innocent, then we decided to hang out and catch up.
He was back with his childrens mom and they had a 3rd daughter. He seemed miserable and told me that they fight all the time but he couldnt see himself being a every other weekend dad so endured the misery and stuck it out.
All the while ( 6 years) when I wasnt in a realtionship we semi-secretly decided to “hang out”. Talking of the what-ifs and the dreams we shared. My close friends knew, his close friends knew, but the entire time I knew what I was doing was against everything i believed was right, but I loved him, he loved me. Just because he was unhappy didnt give us the right.
Last year, I decided just after the new year that i was done. I wasnt happy with what had been going on, it was not getting me anywhere so I sent Mr3m and email and said I am done. Besides I am a firm believe in what goes around comes around so I thought if I dont stop doing this one day someone will be messing with my man.
A few days after I sent the email, he called. I ignored it the first 10 times but then he left a message and i jokingly said to my friend “he and *the ex* probably broke up and now he wants me back” haha. After listening to his message sounding so broken i decided to return his call.
I was being short as I just sent him the message asking him to never contact me again. He did get it as he and the ex did break up and she took his computer so he couldnt check his email. So I sent it to his work. He seemed hurt by the break up but I didnt care, I wanted to be done.
Ironically the same night I sent him the email was the same night they split up.
Against my better judgement, we started to hang out. He took me on dates and was the gentleman I remember from years ago when we fell in love.
Here we are almost a year later. He proposed in May, we bought a house and life is great and are planning to get married in June 2010.
However, part of me knows that I was the other woman. We have discussed our insecurities in regard to that. I sometimes fear that now that he has me at home, who is going to be the other woman. He does have a lot of female friends. He continuously reassures me that he was unhappy and now he has his mountain top (me) and he has loved me for 8 years.
I just wonder if I was the only “other woman” Heck, maybe I am but I just wanted you all to know me because maybe someone can relate to my insecurities and sometimes I feel uncomfortable posting to a board because I feel like I dont have the typical relationship some may have on this site. But I trust you all to share.