Post # 1
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
I married a police officer, and he wore his dress uniform in our wedding, and 6 of his coworkers were in his honour guard. Because of this my husband has asked that no photos of our wedding be posted anywhere. Not on facebook, not on weddingbee, not on the photographer’s website, which I’m respecting.
HOWEVER it kind of sucks! I worked really hard on our wedding and want to show it off!
Darling Husband says people have gone generations without being able to share everything with 200 of their closest facebook friends and posting it all over the internet. I agree that we got married for ourselves, and that’s all that really matters… most of the time.
What do you guys think? Has the internet spawned a generation of over-sharers?
ETA: I’m totally not saying that wanting to show wedding photos is over-sharing. I married a bit of a techno-phobe who really doesn’t understand what I get out of keeping in contact with tons of people from highschool, or getting opinions/support from strangers on these boards, so I just though it was interesting!
Post # 3
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
Well, yeah, there are a lot of oversharers, but I don’t think wanting to show off wedding photos is over-sharing. Theres a reason people leave wedding albums on their coffee tables for decades 🙂
Post # 4
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee
i understand what you mean. i think a lot of people ARE guilty of oversharing..i don’t think they understand that what they put out there in cyberspace STAYS out there forever. however, in general i dont think wedding photos are oversharing (though i totally understand your husbands reasoning), i don’t really think they are Too Much Information.
that being said, i know how you feel. i have to be careful what i put out there about my fiance, due to the nature of his job. i have a blog right now, and share very little details about him (but there are photos), but i’m not sure i can keep the blog after we’re married. if i can, i know i will need to give the address to the powers that be at his company. i also had “rules” of what i could put on our wedding website, since his first and last name are on it.
Post # 5
Member
3788 posts
Honey bee
I AGREE! Not entirely, as I have posted pictures on here, but I do think that expanding social media have become vehicles for narcissism and eroded our internal censors. There is definitely too much “look at me” and attention seeking. Arguably, the mere existence of a facebook or such account could be deemed attention seeking, but I think it can be tasteful in moderation. I do not, however, think we need a status update because you went to the bathroom, know what I’m saying?
End rant.
That being said, I completely see your side of it and think that the flip side is that forums like this are great outlets and resources and that sharing a little can help those aims. I know your wedding must have been beautiful, and I am sure your family and friends will love seeing your pictures!
Post # 6
Member
2344 posts
Buzzing bee
I would be frustrated by that too! Could you create a private album on a photo website like Shutterfly that you need a password to access? That way you could send the password out to your family and friends.
You could also post a few pictures on here of just your wedding details or just you in your wedding dress! If he and the members of his honour guard aren’t in the pictures, it would be okay right?
Post # 7
Member
5655 posts
Bee Keeper
Over-sharers DEFINITELY… but most that I come in contact with are face to face. lol. I think the internet sharing is more of a compulsive need to feel like others care rather than over-sharing… nevertheless that’s kinda gotten out of hand too.
I commend you for your awesome submission and respecting your husbands desires…. and like he said (well what i got)… the people that needed to see all the awesome work you put into the wedding were there… everyone else… doesn’t really matter.
congratulations! =)
Post # 8
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
I agree that a lot of people do overshare. The things that really bug me are private or personal information (don’t care that you just had sex and don’t tell me where you are going to be all the time).
Post # 9
Member
988 posts
Busy bee
I am the biggest over-sharer ever! I have no filter and i hate it…I am that person that updates their facebook all the time. I have to make a super concious effort to stop myself from sharing too much.
Post # 10
Member
455 posts
Helper bee
I don’t necessarily agree because I think “community” has become a much larger term. I mean, if you lived in a smaller community, which was normal many years ago, people would have more information and exposure to your life than they did many years ago. The concept of ‘sharing’ within your ‘community’ has expanded as the concept of ‘community’ has expanded.
Um. what was the question again.. :p
Post # 11
Member
3316 posts
Sugar bee
I had to be a bit careful on sharing. I’m a lawyer, and most of my business comes from people who have found me on my Web site. I therefore wanted to make sure that when someone Googled my name, they would get my professional Web site, not wedding details.
However, I still share nonidentifying photos here. And I have identifying ones on “friends-only” sharing on Facebook.
Post # 12
Member
7771 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
You say that he wanted you to not post because he is an officer. Then you make it sound like he just wants it to be private because it is for you two. I guess I am not sure of your exact angle, if you are saying he wants it to be private because of his job, or because it is just meant for the two of you, or if you are asking in general- do people over share?
Anyway, there is definitely something to it. I am a very private person, and I am not on facebook, and niether is Darling Husband. FB is way too “on the grid” for me. I think a lot of mystery is lost, and also- do I really want to know about those people from the past, or have ex boyfriends contacting me? No way. I am an old-school person, and I think it is a very interesting time -everyone sharing everything. Get this- Darling Husband does even have a cell. Super old school! With WB, I don’t mind posting, no one knows us 🙂
Post # 13
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
@cbee: I was asked not to post anything because of the uniform. Darling Husband doesn’t understand why if this wasn’t a factor I would have any interest in posting pictures anyway. He’s kind of like “why do you care whether people you don’t even know think our centrepieces were cute?” and really… I don’t even know!
I was mostly commenting on how it’s so common now to post on facebook, or weddingbee or be “blogged” on your photographer’s website, that it’s strange that I feel kind of left out of “normal” behaviour, that really is relatively new.
Post # 14
Member
7771 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
I know what you mean! My Darling Husband sounds just like yours in that regard! It is just fun and exciting for us to share something that means so much to us, especially to get positive comments. But, I see their point :/ It is such a public generation…
Post # 15
Member
494 posts
Helper bee
Is he willing to let you share the photos that do not have him or his GM’s in them? That way you get to show off your wedding but he still stays out of it. I know police officers dont like having their pictures out there and I can understand why but maybe he would compromise. Granted people would only get to see the BM’s, you, and other family but that something, right! 🙂
Post # 16
Member
2196 posts
Buzzing bee
Wait…I still don’t understand why his uniform is a cause for keeping photos so private? Can you explain more?
I’d be bummed if I wasn’t allowed to show off the wedding I put so much effort into. :/ I mean, I don’t want to plaster all of my photos all over the internet, but a few key ones will go on facebook for sure.
