Post # 1
I’m just curious ladies (and the few gents out there), whether you are engaged, married or waiting…. what do you consider to be the steps of a relationship? If you don’t call them steps, maybe the progression or sections?
For example, what I generally think of is; Talking -> Dating -> Serious -> Sharing Things (residence/banking/pets/whatever) ->Engagement ->Marriage
But I’m just wondering if I am completely off or if there is a generic that everyone else considers to be the way a relationship moves. I know there are special circumstances and that’s fine, but I’m just wondering what everyone else thinks. Thanks!
Post # 3
@Booknerd: I don’t like to generalize relationships. Everybody is different and I really do not care how they choose to go about it. I also never really felt that I had to stick to a certain path and just went with the flow of things…
In my own relationship with my husband, the steps were the same as yours except we conceived shortly before marriage. That might not work for everyone but having a baby so soon was not an issue for us.
Post # 4
For us it was: Friends – Talking – Dating (from talking to falling in love) – Engagement – Marriage. We moved in together after we were married, we also combined finances then too although we had deposit rights to each other’s bank accounts before we were married.
Post # 5
It varies from person to person. Ours was acquaintances–friends–talking–dating/hanging out–making it official & exclusive–becoming best friends–engagement–and later this year marriage.
Post # 6
For us it was:
- Talking/gaming (we met online playing WoW)
- Dating (LD for a few weeks)
- Meeting each other in person
- Moving in
- purchased a home
- marriage (04/26/13)
We only dated for about 2 months before he moved in with me. We’ll be together for 5 years when we get married in a few months.
Post # 7
- Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium
We dated for two weeks – became exclusive- moved in together – joined finances – got engaged – got married. In the span of 6 years, with a one year engagement.
Post # 8
Ours went like this:
Found each other online > First date 3 weeks later > Officially dating 2 weeks after first date > Saying “I love you” 3 weeks after first date > Getting engaged 1 year after first date > Moving in together 2 months after engagement > Getting married 2 years and 3 months after first date, 1 year and 2 months after getting engaged, 1 year after living together.
I didn’t want to live together or combine our belongings or finances until after we were engaged and he fully agreed.
Post # 9
Mine was a bit backwards…
sex->talking->dating->the sharing of residences and finances will be done after the marriage.
Post # 10
I’d agree you can’t really generalize the steps. Everyones relationships go different routes and end at different places.
Our steps were:
A day of talking nonstop —- one date and then a week apart
bf/gf status after that week apart
moved in together after a month (but he seriously had a drawer at my place a week after we became offical, he spent a lot of time there)
i love you’s about two months, maybe three into the relationship
co signed a loan on a car for him at 6 months in — engaged at a year and half into the relationship —-bought a house two years into the relationship
marriage will be 2 years and 11 months exactly into the relationship—marriage in july and then babies and raising our family and retirement will round us out…haha
Post # 11
Our steps were:
First date a month later
Said I love you 2 weeks later
Engaged 6 weeks after that
Moved in 6 months later
Married 2 months after that
Post # 12
I think that every relationship is different. But for the sake of adding some stats:
Met Online (Oct ’10)
First Date (Nov ’10)
Talked Marriage – two weeks in! (Nov ’10)
Said ‘I Love You’ (Dec ’10)
Travelled Together (June-August ’11)
Moved In Together (September ’11)
B Ordered Ring Through Family Member – Never got delivered, very long story (Nov ’11)
Got Engaged (July ’12)
Civil Marriage (Jan ’13)
Jewish Wedding & Celebration (August ’13)
For us, we were sure in a few weeks. My husband is nearly 34 now and was 31 at the time – he was ready to settle down and was just waiting for the right girl. We were engaged after 18 months because of a ring never being delivered, the plan was to be engaged in Jan ’12 for my birthday. In the end we got engaged with a placeholder ring last July and jumped in and got married a couple of months back.
I think it is best to take your own relatipnship at your own pace.
Post # 13
Our steps were:
Saying I love you
Building our friendship
Hopefully up next…Engagement
Post # 14
Met (and I brought him home from the bar! No sex though)
Dating (starting about 3 days after we met, dated about 2 months. Sex would go in here too.)
Exclusive/Serious (after dating 2 months)- all happened about pretty much the same time. “I love you” was about 2 weeks later
Moved in (1.5 months after we were “official”)
Engaged (8 months after I moved in)
Married (will be 2 years since our first date)
Those are just how our relationship went, but I don’t think there is any specific list or order you have to follow. I never tried to follow a list either, we just kinda went with the flow of things. We haven’t officially merged or opened any bank accounts but we think of it as our money.
Post # 15
Post # 16
-Met at work (training class)
-Moved in together