Post # 1
I don’t know why, but recently I began to feel a glimmer of hope that Mrs. Crazy would decline our invitation. No such luck. Doesn’t she know that I hate her, and don’t want her there? Why can’t she stumble upon weddingbee.com, read my posts, realize they’re about her, and be so offended at my blatent rudeness that she refuses to come? That would be ideal.
My heart sank when I saw she reserved a hotel room. I typically try to always maintain myself gracefully, but I don’t know that I can in this instance. I think I will completely ignore her. Or say “oh. I’m so surpised you made the trip” and walk away.
For those of you who are just joining the story:
Mrs. Crazy is a stranger who lives on the other side of the country from me. Fiance and her son were childhood friends. As a young teen, her son died of a drug overdose. (ten years ago) Fiance and Mrs. Crazy fell out of touch when the Crazies packed up and moved across country. I’ve been with Fiance for 6 years and have never heard of the Crazies. Last Fall, Mrs. Crazy finds Fiance on facebook, sees his status says “engaged” and sends him a facebook message. It said: ” Hi Son, ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED?? Where is our invitation? We miss you. We would love to fly you out to _______ so we can see you. Our daughter, little Miss. Crazy, would love to take you snowboarding. She’s still single by the way 😉 Love, Mom”
Vomit, vomit, vomit!
Fiance says to me, “VM, I know that email was rude….but I feel like I owe it to my dead friend to invite his parents to the weddng….”
And now, Mrs. Crazy is coming to my wedding.
**disclaimer: we all agree that the death of a child is tragic, and horrific, and something you never “get over”. She’s grieving, that’s not the point of my frustration. Recognizing that he’s getting married, demanding an invitation, and then trying to set him up with your daughter is what has me fuming.
Post # 3
I think the only thing I can really add to this is…
That sucks…plain and simple. Don’t go out of your way to be nice, but don’t go out of your way to be mean (even though every part of your being wants to!). There will be enough other people at the wedding that can distract you and allow you to ignore her with some dignity. Good luck!
Post # 4
Oh no! Hopfully she wont be so crazy at the wedding!
Post # 5
I agree. At the wedding, there will be so many people that you won’t see her too much since you’ll spread your time with everyone. Try not to think about it too much. I missed your original thread-I can’t believe she wanted to set him up with her daughter after knowing you two were getting married. That’s crazy alright!!!!
Post # 6
Oh wow…what a really werid and sticky situation.
The only thing i can say is that you dont know her so she will (hopefully) be a flower on the wall at the wedding and you wont even remember that she is there 🙂
Post # 7
@Baileyh: I hoped the same thing. But apparently Mrs. Crazy is a bit of a wine-o. Awesome.
Post # 8
Ugh! Just stay away!!! Hopefully she doesn’t sniff you out and demand attention! What a yucky situation!! Good luck!
Post # 9
First of all, I adore you. Seriously, you always make me laugh, and I always read your posts because of it.
This woman sounds like a nutter, and like she has no “inside voice”. I can’t imagine what it’s like to lose a son, especially at such a young age. I also can’t imagine addressing someone you haven’t seen in years as both “son” and then offering up my daughter to said fake “son”. Creepy. Vomit. Ugh.
((hugs)) for you, my dear. This is a tough one.
Post # 10
Oh NO VM! I’ve been following your posts on the Crazies and I’m so sorry to hear she’s coming. You said that you only invited Mr. & Mrs. Crazy, right? There’s no chance that her daughter is coming…right?? Ugh…I feel terrible for you. I give you permission to be as rude as you want to be to her on your wedding day. Ick, and vomit.
Post # 11
@Ms. MoxieMonkey: Well thank you for the love. I need that right now. Because I am sitting here slowly morphing into a monster. This isn’t what weddings are about. I shouldn’t be so angry that someone is coming. I hate how I’ve let this bother me so much.
But she’s such a crazy, thoughtless, slimy, rude, tactless, asshole!
Post # 12
Don’t stress! There were quite a few people that I REALLY did not want at my wedding, but when the day came, I didn’t even notice they were there. Seriously. And this was with a guest list of only 100. So just plan on ignoring her and hopefully it will be like she is not even there at all!
P.S. I have read your other posts, and I can’t help but feel sorry for her just a tiny bit. This is probably the closest thing she will ever experience to her own son getting married, so as long as she doesn’t make a scene on your day, hopefully she will just use the experience as part of the mourning process and move on.
Post # 13
@2PeasinaPod: Thank you, peas! Their hotel reservation says “2” adults. I think we made it very clear that daughter isn’t invited. If daughter shows up, I will just lose it. 🙁
Post # 14
Hm. It honestly seems like maybe she was just joking around about “where’s my invitation?” but you never know! Either way, the attempt to set up your VERY ENGAGED Fiance with her daughter is NUTS, and would have me absolutley fuming. If it’s any consolation, she will likely end up embarassing herself and hopefully won’t bring anyone down with her…
Post # 15
oh, awkward. hopefully it will just result in a good story?
Post # 16
@rachel_leigh: I agree with you, I always pity the pathetic.