(Closed) the ring dilemma

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2577 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Get a totally new ring. I get the feeling you will not be happy otherwise.

Post # 5
Member
1160 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Can you get it engraved…or have a small gemstone hidden in the band?

Post # 7
Member
509 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@LaTortuga: I understand that you want it to feel like it’s yours but it is an heirloom. “Everytime my dad tries to show it off he talks about how it was his grandfathers, blah blah blah.” He’s proud of it! I am almost in tears writing this because it frustrates me (brings back memories of an heirloom that was taken away from me). Let him brag about it. The sentiments go both ways now with you having the memory of the proposal. If it bothers you that much then have Fiance get a promise ring. They’re affordable and just as pretty. Or better yet, (if you’re broke) get creative! Find or make something. If all else fails talk to your Dad and tell him how you feel. You may hurt his feelings but you may also open up his eyes as to how he’s hurting yours. 

Post # 9
Member
3969 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I’d love to see a picture! I think in time it will feel like yours, esp if he backs off talking about the grandfather. I think it’s sort of like taking a new last name.. it takes a while to get used to.

Post # 11
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

You’re stuck in a bind if you are uncomfortable with it but dont want to part with it, and you can’t change it either.

 

 

Post # 12
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Am I *seriously* the only one that’s confused here????

Are you saying that your fiancee proposed to you, giving you an engagement ring that once belonged to your own grandfather (presumably not originally an engagement ring)?

 

Post # 13
Member
4663 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

i think that since the only time you are uncomfortable with it is when you are around your dad. so this might be something you just have to bite your tongue about and enjoy the ring. i think with time your dad might ease off talking about it. he is probably just very proud now and happy.

since you admitted that you do like the look of the ring and the significance, this might just be something you have to work with. see if you can find it within yourself to embrace it or else just get a new ring.

Post # 15
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

@LaTortuga:  It definitely sounds like what other posters are saying, that it’s mostly about how your dad views it and is bragging about it, not as an engagement ring but an heirloom. It seems like he’s very understanding about it, so I hope you can find a way to really have a deep identification with your ring. It is yours, no one else’s. It just has some history to it, and you’re adding to that history now. Good luck with it 🙂

Post # 16
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@LaTortuga:  OK, thanks for explaining. Sorry to trouble you, I just didn’t get it at first.

The topic ‘the ring dilemma’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors