(Closed) THE RING IS THEIR PROBLEM AND SO IS EVERYTHING ELSE

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
9130 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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juju27:  Sorry your mom is being like that. You don’t even need a ring at all to be engaged. You got a proposal AND a ring — you’re engaged. Congratulations!

Post # 4
Member
1667 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2018 - Our Backyard

No ring needed to be engaged. That said, I’d still like to see it ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
Member
534 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

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juju27:  I’m so sorry your parents are reacting like that. They might not have realized how serious you two were until the engagement.  

You are definitely engaged. I got engaged without any ring at all and a lot of other people have too. The ring sounds like a sweet and heartfelt gesture on his part. ๐Ÿ™‚

Congrats! 

Post # 6
Hostess
1711 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: City, State

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juju27:  It’s a shame that your family is treating you the way they are, but probably they just have their own notion of how things should be done and what happened with you and your Fiance doesn’t fit into that mold.  Try not to be too upset because at the end of the day you are engaged to the man you love and you have your whole lives together to show them that they were wrong to doubt your engagement and committment to each other.  Regardless of their lack of enthusiasm, it is good to hear that your Fiance is focusing on just you guys and that your friends are happy for you too.  Ring or no ring, if you have both decided to spend your lives together and have decided on a date, then you are engaged to be married.

If it makes you feel better, my Fiance didn’t tell his family he was going to propose and we came back from a cruise (it was actually to Jamaica ;)) and we went to his mom’s house first to tell her and show her the ring and she was very blase about it.  She just kind of briefly glanced at the ring and said, “Oh, nice.” and then moved on with the conversation.   There was no gushing over the ring, no asking how he proposed, nothing.  It was pretty obvious she wasn’t that excited, but I didn’t let her rain on my parade and I suggest you don’t let anyone else rain on yours.  Congats on your engagement and also, congrats on almost being done with nursing school!  ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 7
Member
1887 posts
Buzzing bee

Congratulations! I’m sorry that your relatives are being such jerks. I’ve never heard of needing witnesses to get engaged, or needing to be in a church. Your story sounds super cute to me. Rock that ring with pride!

Post # 8
Member
6905 posts
Busy Beekeeper

That sucks and appears to either reek of snobbery or your families are both so extremely traditional that it simply won’t do.  He proposed, you said yes, you are engaged even if he dumped a jug of water over your head afterwards and never gave you a ring at all.  I think both families are being rude – people can be excited about an engagement while still thinking a ring is unappealing.  Look to your friends and his aunt for the support you would wish of your parents.

Post # 12
Member
460 posts
Helper bee

Congratulations โ˜บa ring isn’t the be all and end all so hopefully both of your mums realise this soon. Easier said than done but try not to let it get you down too much.

Post # 13
Member
4037 posts
Honey bee

I didn’t have a ring, for weeks after I accepted my FH’s proposal. My grandmother gave him her engagement ring, to give to me. Because of arthritis in her fingers, she was no longer able to wear it. We’ve been married almost 40 years.

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