(Closed) The rudest thing I've every seen printed on a wedding invitation

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 122
Member
855 posts
Busy bee

WHAT?!

I don’t see the problem with asking for cash if it’s done in a nice way (my friend did a cute poem) but THAT?!

Not nice.

ETA: I agree with @JoolyBee though – I wouldn’t retract a gift just because someone had no manners. That makes two rude people. Manners should come from both parties!

Post # 123
Member
9129 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

@WannaBeeMrsB:  I’m with you.  This asking for money is super rude, but it’s also SUPER rude to withold your gift because of it!  Just be the bigger person, sheesh.

Post # 124
Member
688 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

asking for money on the invitation is completely normal in my country. Perhaps they phrased it a bit bluntly, but I would never think of this as rude or offensive to the guests. Most invitations here just show an envelope icon as a suggestion for money. We never have registry lists at stores. 

 

Just give them what you had in mind at first. It’s rude not to do so. 

 

 

Post # 125
Member
1602 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@AB Bride:  “I would be tempted to gift them an etiquette book.”

This.

Post # 126
Member
674 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@babecake:  I don’t think its rude, but it is strange (I think I have a different definition of “rude”, and honesty isn’t one of them), especially for them to put their bank account number on there.

Post # 129
Member
996 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Sorry but you don’t need to be a member of this site to know that saying :“We’re going to be completely honest here. All we want is money for our wedding.”  is rude and shows a clear lack of manners. In the event that you DON’T realize that saying something like that is rude…well it’s time to learn some manners! I’d send her a $10 gift certificate to mcdonalds.

There is no excuse for bad manners. Not one.

Post # 130
Member
1900 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I don’t think it’s rude for them to ask for money – where I’m from, it’s pretty normal to include information about gifts (including cash gifts) on the invitations. However, I do think the way they have phrased it is very poor. It’s possible they meant it as a joke “Hey, look how rude and blunt we’re being, isn’t that hilarious?” sort of thing, but the actual statement is incredibly rude.

Post # 131
Member
5107 posts
Bee Keeper

@AB Bride:  LOLOLOLOL!

I dk, I have a friend getting married and all I want to give her IS money. If they are THAT desperate, give them money. If you have $200, I’d say give them the $200.

Post # 132
Member
5107 posts
Bee Keeper

@PinkMermaid:  I go back to the golden rule of “two wrongs don’t make a right.” just because one person didn’t have manners does not give another person a “free pass” to do something bitchy like give them a $10 gift certificate as a wedding present lol.

Post # 134
Member
996 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@ChuckNorris:  It gives me a free pass lol. I might even do a $5 gift certificate depending on how irritated it was that day. Cool

Post # 135
Member
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would never (in a million years) wire transfer money into someone’s account for a gift.  First off, I’m not paying a $25 transfer fee.  That’s bullshit reason number 1.  Secondly, how is the couple going to even know whom has tranferred funds into their account?  Are they going to get a print out of that and be able to send thank you notes?

 

If you were originally going to give $200 to this classless couple, I say write a check for $150 and put it in the card to be given the day of the event.  Don’t reward bad manners.  

 

And yes, this totally sounds like they can’t really afford their wedding and are expecting the guests to forward cash to foot the bill.  No shame in not being able to afford weddings, but this is kind of like charging your guests a cover fee.  

Post # 136
Member
2268 posts
Buzzing bee

Wow. Just…wow.

@AB Bride:  “I would be a little tempted to get them an etiquette book as a gift.

Please, please do this.

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